700.
Not allowed to use basic economics to crash the evil empire's economy by spending all
my swag there at once.
701.
Cannot take the moniker "the Hyperpolysyllabicsesquipedalinist" 702.
The Banana of Disarming is not a real magic item.
703.
Cannot sharpen Ioun stones for increased headbutt damage.
704.
No using my hideously low Charisma to get the villain to do the opposite of what I suggest.
705.
Need to stop using my reality altering ability to make every day Mardi Gras.
706.
Cannot base my barbarian after Wink Martindale. 707.
A throat punch does not give a bonus in a contested philosophy check.
708.
My paladin mini is vetoed if it's obviously Private Drake from Aliens.
709.
Any plan is vetoed if it was obviously inspired by Boromir.
710.
My info gathering mission must include info that wasn't obviously obtained in a brothel.
711.
If almost all the words in my character's background start with the same letter, he's
vetoed.
712.
When told to leave a trail for the rest of the party to follow, they didn't mean with
cigarette butts. 713.
Even if the rules allow it, can't sink a battleship with a stapler.
714.
I do not get a bulk discount on ninjas. 715.
Even if the rules allow it, I can't invent the strip joint.
716.
I cannot play a race the GM can't pronounce. 717.
I cannot start the game in post-apocalyptic Poland driving a Porsche.
718.
Warnings given retroactively in battle aren't appreciated.
719.
A fluffy tail does not add to my comliness if I'm already 1' tall, furry and a squirrel.
720.
Don't have to include the line "And then stab them a lot" in the plan; it's already assumed.
721.
Even if my super power is invisibility, still have to provide a model for my character.
722.
Can't intentionally fail all my secret door checks so I don't have to play Tomb of Horrors
again.
723.
If my character is related to a god, it can't be as a parent.
724.
The time machine is not for finishing my set of Disciple autographs.
725.
No, there is not a Mr. Of Arc.
No, I still can't hit on her.
726.
My black ops experience does not include panty raids and beer runs.
727.
Cannot singlehandedly make Starfleet Academy the #1 party school in the Alpha Quadrant.
728.
Not legal to retroactively challenge anyone I just shot to a duel.
729.
Cannot take the flaw Obsession: Elf Chick's lingerie.
730.
No part of the plan includes: You give me the idol, I give you the whip.
731.
No matter how many called shots to the neck I make, I'm still not going to cause a cool
pyrotechnics display.
732.
Not allowed to trade in my X-Wing for a Gunstar. 733.
Cannot make a plan that hinges on the villain first being allergic to peanuts.
734.
My character's background cannot be a wikipedia biography with "Falco" crossed off and my
character's name written in.
735.
Adding hydrolics to my R2 unit does not give him an intimidate bonus.
736.
No taking the party to Kara-Tur just because my character has a thing for Asian chicks.
737.
Will not color code everything on the ship just to piss off the Vargyr.
738.
Though highly educational, no more slipping the anti-paladin sodium pentathal.
739.
Can't make the blacks ops super easy by sending a couple of strippers to the guardroom first.
740.
Not allowed to give my character a name from a bushman click language.
741.
Not possible to tap a keg for mana. 742.
Apparently Chaotic Angry and Neutral Hungry aren't real alignments either.
743.
Even if the rules allow it, can't takes out an MBT with a shotgun loaded with slug.
744.
My second wish can't be for a new, more open minded genie to grant my remaining wishes.
745.
Can't wish I was the GM.
746.
No making up holidays for my cleric. 747.
Can't just walk the obstacle course, even though I beat everybody who tried to run it.
748.
Holding a pillow over a sleeping person's face is not a gnomish expression of affection.
749.
There is not a Spent Clip Fairy. 750.
A bag of holding is a bad place to stash bear traps, badgers or crushed glass.
751.
If the party has to pose as classical German composers, I will not declare "I'll be Bach"
752.
Cannot take the spetum as my favorite weapon just because it sounds dirty.
753.
No encouraging swedish accents. 754.
Even if the rules give no maximum encumbrance, still can't pick up the bank and walk away
with it.
755.
There is a reason no game has pasties in it's starting equipment list.
756.
The Power Armor skill does not have a cascade skill dance.
757.
I will not build a character with a skill from every single expansion book.
758.
Not allowed to take a toad for a familiar just for it's pharmaceutical properties.
759.
Restricted to one blue chip for humor per game.
760.
Can't use the time machine to rename famous historical discoveries after myself.
761.
Not allowed to forge the 1.1 ring.
762.
Fighter can't put points in Perform just so he can hammer dance after each fatal critical
hit.
763.
No slipping the juicer Ritalin. 764.
In the middle of a chase in a commandeered car can't spend an action to change the radio
presets. 765.
Can't parry with a called shot to the face.
766.
No more Crazy Ivans while I'm driving the AT-AT.
767.
When challenged to a high noon shoot-out, that means in the time zone I'm currently
in.
768.
Burning my bard song on CD and putting it on repeat does not mean the effect never ends.
769.
Before turning undead, make sure the assassin didn't take the vampire template.
770.
My mythos investigator doesn't talk in his sleep.
771.
Mashed potatoes do not add to my damage resistance.
772.
Not allowed to base a paladin off Lee Marvin.
773.
My great axe priviledges can be taken away.
774.
If I've leveled up 5 times to the Dragonkin's 0, that doesn't mean I'm lapping him.
775.
My investigator's motto is not "99% Mythos Lore, 1% Sanity- don't push me"
776.
Even if it was obviously in self defense, my character is not allowed to kill George
Takei. 777.
Tai Kwan Doberman is not a real martial art.
778.
It is not possible to bioengineer a kosher pig.
779.
Even if we are in Ravenloft, Paladin can't go up ten levels in one night.
780.
When told I have to join the RPGA to play in a game, can't sign the membership card
"D. Duck." 781.
My tribe's trial by combat ritual is not best described as "Calvinball with axes"
782.
My paladin's job is not to enforce happiness.
783.
The following are also not acceptable Ironclaw characters: Mortal Wombat, Dalai Llama, Boom
Orangutan. 784.
Monks do not make 3 Stooges sounds in combat.
785.
Even if the rules allow it, can't shoot 20 guys in one round with a musket.
786.
No I cannot keep the drow priestess we just found as a pet.
787.
"Start a career in modeling" is not an appropriate use of the Suggestion spell.
788.
"You take the scary one" is not our default battle strategy.
789.
Even if it's for his own safety, can't secretly remove the firing pins from the powergamer's
guns.
790.
If I have access to warm water, I don't take watch unsupervised.
791.
Not allowed to give any birthday gift to a child that immediately earns me a dark side
point.
792.
Despite the movie's claims, Wookies get no racial bonus for chess.
793.
When building a superhero, can't spend half his points on radar sense and the other half
on cooking.
794.
Pregen characters do not have cutesy nicknames, even if their real names are pretty lame.
795.
Improved Evasion is not solid proof "Duck and Cover" works.
796.
In the middle of the black ops can't lock a bunch of long haired molting cats into the
CEO's office.
797.
If in the middle of our dressing down our CO strokes out, we took the joke too far.
798.
Not allowed to use guppies as buckshot. 799.
Can't hunt drow with a spotlight and 30.06.