(person groaning)
(Jordan laughing)
- It's no use!
It just doesn't want to come out.
- Honey, you've been in here for hours.
- I'm sorry for laughing so much.
Medical procedures gone terribly wrong,
kidney stone fairies, and so many wild medical things
we have to talk about.
Prepare to laugh and learn a little
as we react to Cyanide and Happiness, number five.
Let's dive right in.
(person groaning) (Jordan laughing)
- It's no use.
It just doesn't want to come out.
- Honey, you've been in here for hours.
- I'm sorry for laughing so much.
If you're pushing so hard that you're sweating,
you're gonna increase the risk of a rectal prolapse,
internal or external hemorrhoids,
which can cause anal fissures.
You need to adjust your diet.
A high fiber diet, a lot of water.
Make sure you're moving around.
Make sure that you don't end up in this circumstance.
- Maybe a good night's sleep would do you good?
- Oh god!
Kidney stones are the worst.
- Oh, he's not even talking about poop.
He's talking about kidney stones.
- Kidney stones.
- Kidney stones are horrible.
It's an excruciating amount of pain.
We give fluids, we give anti-inflammatories,
we give pain medication to help relax the tubing
so it can get out easily,
but they're so painful.
And some people are just more apt to get 'em than others.
What have we got here?
What is this fairy?
Oh gosh, oh gosh, oh my gosh.
Oh!
It's the kidney fairy stone.
It's the fairy kidney stone.
It's the kidney stone fairy.
Amazing.
Some are spiky.
We call them staghorns.
You can give it to the doc
and figure out what the stone is made up of.
Majority of it's calcium.
It could help in maybe readjusting your diet.
- Oh my god, it's worse than ever!
- What happened?
- I think I need to go to the hospital.
(Jordan laughing)
- I don't know why the fairy put a coin in the urethra.
Good anatomy, good picture.
Obviously, we're seeing the pelvis.
We're seeing the vertebrae.
We're seeing arms and we're seeing a femur
and then just soft tissue relating to the genitals.
- Almost there, Mrs. Larrison.
- Oh my gosh, the doctor again with this mirror on the head.
They don't wear those anymore.
Oh, we're delivering a baby.
(popping) - Oh, there he is!
- I love the pop noise.
It doesn't make that kind of noise.
- There's your little bundle of--
(baby screaming)
- We didn't see the cord getting cut.
You potentially will clamp the cord right away,
give the baby to the mom.
And then you actually wait
because then you have the second birth,
which is actually just the placenta
separating from the uterine wall.
- What is it, doc?
What's wrong?
- I'm sorry, but your baby,
little baby Larry, he's sad.
- A screaming baby is a fantastic thing.
We want screaming, pissed off kids.
That means their airway is good and intact.
- You miserable little (beeping)!
You're ruining the happiest day of my life!
- It's not the baby's fault.
The baby's either got poop in its butt, a wet diaper,
uncomfortable, hungry,
or sometimes there's something called a hair tourniquet
that you need to look for.
- They're usually happy to be alive!
- Do you know how long I gave up drinking
to grow your stupid (beeping) in my womb, Larry?!
Three months!
- Typically, a pregnancy lasts about 10 months or 40 weeks.
We shouldn't be drinking.
It can cause something called fetal alcohol syndrome.
It increases all these other risks during pregnancy.
- Let me try.
Nope.
- If a baby comes out and they're not crying,
you vigorously rub and clean the baby.
You're trying to stimulate the baby to breathe and cry.
- Hit him harder!
Keep hitting him!
- This is all sorts of wrong.
We have patients come into the emergency department,
we have a suspicion that there's abuse at home.
We'll do full skeletal surveys
and then we'll actually get social work involved
anytime we have a little bit of suspicion
there might be something wrong.
- This is the worst day of my life!
Why can't you be normal like that baby?
- Oh my gosh.
(baby babbling) What?
Okay, that was just a very intense,
unnecessary high energy, high stress environment.
I bet if they were calm and quiet, the baby would be fine.
- Huh, listen to this.
It says here that a person is still conscious
15 seconds after their head is cut off.
- So maybe this from back in the day
when they used guillotines,
there are potential movements of the body,
even though the head is not attached just for a few seconds.
But typically, the patient's not talking.
- Yeah, right.
Sounds fake to me.
- Oh yeah?
How much you wanna bet?
- I'll bet you five bucks.
- You're on.
- (laughing) I wasn't expecting that.
It looks like a humerus on top where his spine is,
so it doesn't pop off like that obviously.
It's not that easy
to disarticulate your head from your spine.
- [Narrator] But modern medicine was able to rebuild him.
- Modern medicine?
That's now!
- [Narrator] Terrible accident, modern medicine.
- Oh my gosh, it's like "Universal Soldier."
I don't know if anybody's seen that movie.
All the doctors, of course,
they're wearing their lab coats,
their white coats,
but they're also wearing those darn mirrors again.
Oh my gosh.
On head trauma,
you can cause a nose bleed.
You can have a nasal fracture.
Obviously, that's not really gonna do much
unless you're on a blood thinner
that's gonna have you bleed more and more.
(bees buzzing)
Holy cow.
Even if you're not allergic to bee stings,
you can cause a reaction where you vasodilate enough
to where you can die
by just not having enough blood pressure.
Wow.
Falling out of a tree, that's a major trauma
so he needs to go to a trauma center.
- Well, you're a little scraped up,
but it looks like you're going to be fine.
- Yeah, okay.
You have all those needles and syringes.
We don't know what those are from.
We have those containers to put our sharps in
and they're changed out almost every day,
especially at the hospital I work at.
We know that's a fall greater than three times his height,
and landed on his head.
Likely, this would actually take somebody's life.
Holy cow.
- Looks like you may have a fracture here.
Wait, no, that's just a hair.
You're perfect! - Damn it!
- Oh my gosh.
Imaging for that type of trauma,
in the United States, we do CT scans, head and neck,
and then you'll do a CT chest, abdomen, and pelvis.
- Any last words you want to have with her,
you should have with her now.
- Oh, that's kind of sad.
- I'm sorry.
- Okay.
- This is common.
Unfortunately in the emergency department,
the family shows up and we'll discuss what's happening.
We will tell them the worst case scenario,
so that way, you're kind of mentally prepared.
- (coughing) Who's that?
- It's me, your son.
- No!
I have a daughter!
Get out!
- Aw, that's so sad.
It's so sad 'cause it happens.
Sometimes when somebody has dementia,
they may not remember who their loved ones are,
family members are.
It's pretty common to not know,
but they know your energy
and I've seen it enough
that just being in the presence of a family member
in that situation is really important.
Oh my gosh, he put on a wig.
- Hey mom, it's me, your daughter.
- Son?
You look like a (beeping) jack.
(machine beeping) (Jordan laughing)
- That was really funny
'cause then she had a lucid interval,
but it doesn't happen that fast.
Somebody doesn't roll over and just.
They basically will just slowly fade typically.
- There there, everything's gonna be all right.
So would you like to go out to dinner sometime?
- Oh my gosh!
You don't date patients,
you don't talk to patients' family members like that.
It's a big no go.
It has to do with the fact
that you're in a position of authority.
It's just not appropriate.
Some of the Cyanide and Happiness stuff
is actually really good,
really good to react to
and kind of pull and tease thing that we can talk about,
which is really important to learn
and understand about your body,
about medicine, and about how medicine is handled,
especially here in the United States.
So if you guys enjoyed this, please do me a favor.
Binge watch this whole series right here.
And as always, make sure you subscribe,
turn those bell notifications on,
hit that like button.
It helps the channel grow.
Thank you so much for watching
and stay healthy, my friends.
(upbeat pop music)
What am I supposed to do?