The majority of Churches have children’s and youth ministries, but is this type of
age-segregated ministry doing more harm than good?
It's time to UNLEARN the lies.
UNLEARN
Hey, welcome to UNLEARN.
My name is Lex, and I'd like to invite you to join us each week as we UNLEARN the lies
and dig deeper into the truth of God's Word.
Now, let's get started.
Age-segregated ministry is a very new development in the Church.
The implementation of Children’s Church and Youth Groups is less than a hundred years
old.
Prior to the 20th century, Church was a family-based community.
Children would worship with their parents, pray with their parents, and hear the Bible
taught with their parents.
This family model allows children to be part of the Church community, and as they grew
up they would be firmly grounded in that community.
However, since the early 20th century this is no longer the standard.
Now, from a very early age children are separated from their parents and placed in age-segregated
classrooms.
It begins in the nursery, moves on into children’s church, and continues into their teenage years
as the youth group.
Basically, the first 18 years of a child’s life in the church is spent away from their
family and away from other adults.
Instead of having one church community with the family as it’s foundation, we end up
having three distinct churches with children’s church, youth church, and adult church.
I see two major problems with this model.
First, it’s not working.
Statistics show that significant numbers of young people are not transitioning into the
adult church from youth ministry after graduation from high school.
The research shows that 70-75% of youth leave the church after high school.
That is a huge failure.
The Bible says: “Train up a child in the way he should go,
And when he is old he will not depart from it.”
- Proverbs 22:6
This shows us that youth ministry is failing because if they were training children the
right way, they wouldn’t be leaving the church in droves.
The second problem I see is that this type of age-segregated ministry is completely unbiblical.
This model is not based on Scripture but is actually based on the secular school system.
I’m speaking as a former youth pastor who once saw youth ministry as an important part
of the Church, and I want to be clear that I’m not picking on youth pastors and youth
ministries.
They sincerely want to make a difference in the lives of young people.
It’s not their fault, it's a faulty church model that’s to blame.
People want to blame a number of different things for why young people are leaving the
church after high school, but the primary problem is that those kids were never part
of the Church, they were simply part of the youth group.
“They went out from us, but they were not of us; for if they had been of us, they would
have continued with us; but they went out that they might be made manifest, that none
of them were of us.”
- 1 John 2:19
Think about it, we separate kids from the adults until they graduate high school, then
we are surprised when they don’t want to be part the church.
All they have known is children’s church and youth group.
They don’t even know what its like to be part of the Church.
One result of age-segregated ministry is that many parents have left the spiritual education
of their kids to the children’s pastor and youth pastor, and in so many cases parents
are no longer discipling their own kids.
Far too often, parents see children’s church and youth group as free babysitters, giving
them time away from their kids.
This mindset has become so deeply set in their minds that they don’t want to be part of
a church that doesn’t have programs for their kids.
The Bible expects parents to teach their children about the Lord.
“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.
“Honor your father and mother” which is the first commandment with a promise “so
that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”
Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and
instruction of the Lord.”
- Ephesians 6:1-4
The age-segregated church model is separating families.
It removes kids from their parents during Church and leads parents to become uninvolved
in the spiritual development of their own children.
We need to bring back the Biblical family-based model of church that builds a community around
the whole family, and we need to equip and encourage parents to be the primary spiritual
influence in their own children’s lives.
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