♪ ♪ ♪ >> Stephen: OH, HEY,
EVERYBODY!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU, BECAUSE YOU KNOW
MY GUESTS TONIGHT AS TWO BELOVED COMEDY LEGENDS AND ONE OF THE
MOST POPULAR SINGERS TODAY.
THEY ARE TEAMING UP TO SOLVE A MURDER IN THEIR NEW SERIES,
"ONLY MURDERS IN THE BUILDING."
>> OLIVER?
>> I'M IN HERE!
>> HEY, WHAT HAPPENED?
ARE YOU OKAY?
>> THE KILLER POISONED MY DOG.
>> WHAT?
>> MY SON HAS HER HELP HE'S A VET.
SHE RECOVERED, THANK GOD.
BUT, CLEARLY, WE ARE GETTING CLOSER.
THEY'RE SENDING A MESSAGE TO THE LEADER.
>> IS THE LEADER YOU?
>> DID THEY POISON YOUR DOG?
THEY LEFT THIS.
>> "I'M THE PODCASTER."
>> WHAT IF WINNIE HAD DIED?
IT WOULD BE ME AGAIN AND MY STUPID... DAMN VISIONARY
AMBITIONS.
>> OKAY, WHOEVER POISONED WINNIE CLEARLY KILLED TIM, SO WHO DID
THIS?
>> GATHER AROUND, I'M GOING TO RORD THIS.
SO, I KNOW THIS SEEMS IMPOSSIBLE.
IT'S BANANAS, BUT I THINK THERE'S A VERY STRONG CHANCE
THAT THE PERSON WHO POISONED WINNIE WAS-- AND THIS GIVES ME
NO PLEASURE IN SAYING THIS-- MUSIC SUPER STAR STING.
( LAUGHTER ).
>> THE GUY FROM U2?
>> Stephen: PLEASE WELCOME TO "THE LATE SHOW," STEVE MARTIN,
MARTIN SHORT, AND SELENA GOMEZ!
♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> STEPHEN!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ).
♪ ♪ ♪ >> THANK YOU SO MUCH!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
YOU ON.
STEVE, ALWAYS GOOD TO SEE YOU.
MARTY, LOVELY TO SEE YOU AGAIN.
SELENA, NICE TO MEET YOU.
THANKS FOR BEING ON.
IT'S THE FIRST TIME WE'VE HAD A CHANCE TO DAWK.
>> IT IS.
I'M SO EXCITED.
A BIG FAN.
>> YOU LOOK FANTASTIC, BY THE WAY.
>> Stephen: THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
>> YOU HAVE THAT-- THAT -- >> Stephen: THANK YOU.
>> THAT THIRD COVID SHOT BLOW.
THE BOOSTER GLOW THEY CALL IT.
>> Stephen: THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
>> AND THIS IS RIGHT OUT OF THE FREE PARKING GUY FROM MONOPOLY,
WHICH I LIKE.
>> Stephen: UNCHGEM PENNYBAGS.
>> SORRY, YOU'LL GET TO SPEAK IN A MINUTE.
I HAVE A THEOR ABOUT YOUR MUSTACHE.
WHICH IS YOUR HAIR APPEARS VERY DARK AND STARTS TO GET GRAY AND
COMES OUT REALLY GRAY.
AND I'M ASSUMING THAT YOUR BODY HAIR JUST GETS GRAYER AND
GRAYER.
>> Stephen: FROM THE NECK DOWN, I'M ANDERSON COOPER.
>> NO, YOU LOOK REALLY GOOD.
>> Stephen: THANK YOU, SO DO YOU.
>> YOU LOOK LIKE-- YOU LOOK LIKE A MATURE BOB SAGET, AND I ALWAYS
WANTED YOU TO LOOK THAT WAY.
>> Stephen: THANK YOU QUITE A MUCH.
THAT'S QUITE A COMPLIMENT.
>> WE CAN CUT THAT, AND THAT.
>> THIS WAS MY LIFE EVERY DAY FOR FIVE MONTHS.
>> Stephen: THE NEW SHOW "ONLY MURDERS IN THE BUILDING" IS
GETTING GREAT REVIEWS.
CONGRATULATIONS ON THAT.
>> THANK YOU
( APPLAUSE )
HAVE YOU ENJOYED THE RESPONSE?
>> PERSONALLY, I'M-- >> FANTASTIC.
>> I MEAN, I THINK THEY'RE-- I DON'T KNOW.
I WAS SHOCKED.
>> YOU WERE SHOCKED?
>> Stephen: SHOCKED PEOPLE ENJOYED YOUR SHOW.
>> YOU THOUGHT PEOPLE WOULD HATE US?
>> A LITTLE BIT.
>> YOU ALWAYS LOVE GETTING A GOOD RESPONSE TO THE SHOW.
AND MARTY GOT THE REVIEW OF HIS LIFETIME IN THE "NEW YORK
TIMES," AND WHEN I READ IT, I WAS SO PROUD.
AND ALSO SHOCKED.
( LAUGHTER )
AFTER YOU HAD READ IT AND YOU WERE BREATHING IN THAT BAG.
I REMEMBER THAT.
>> Stephen: STEVE, BESIDES BEING ONE OF THE STARS, YOU ALSO
CREATED "ONLY MURDERS IN THE BUILDING."
HOW DID THIS IDEA COME ABOUT?
>> I COCREATED IT WITH A GREAT WRITER NAMED JOHN HOFFMAN, AND
WE HAVE SOME AGREEMENT WRITERS ON THE SHOW.
>> Stephen: THEY'RE NOT HERE SO I'M GOING TO GIVE ALL THE
CREDITS TO YOU.
>> YOU NEED A LONGER SOFA.
I JUST HAD THIS THOUGHT OVER 10 YEARS AGO.
AND IT WAS FOR THREE OLDER GUYS WHO LIVE IN A BUILDING IN NEW
YORK WHO REALIZE THEY HAVE A COMMON INTEREST IN SOLVING
CRIME.
BUT BECAUSE THEY'RE OLD, THEY DON'T WANT TO GO OUTSIDE THE
BUILDING BECAUSE IT'S TOO TIRING.
SO THEY DECIDE THEY'LL JUST DO ONLY MURDERS IN THE BUILDING.
( LAUGHTER )
KEPT THIS IDEA IN MY HEAD FOR 10 YEARS.
AND THEN I WAS EXPLAINING IT TO MARTY ONE DAY, AND HE SAID, "YOU
KNOW, WE'RE OLD."
( LAUGHTER )
SOMEBODY'S BRILLIANT IDEA.
>> IT'S AN AMAZING SHOW.
IT'S VERY MUCH LIKE STEVE AT THE URINAL IN THAT IT STREAMS FOR--
IT STREAMS FOR 35 MINUTES, YOU KNOW
( LAUGHTER )
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
>> Stephen: 10 TIMES A SEASON.
>> 10 TIMES A SEASON.
>> Stephen: WERE YOU FAMILIAR WITH THESE GUYS' WORK BEFORE--
DID YOU KNOW WHO ED GRIMLY WAS, FOR INSTANCE?
>> NO.
( LAUGHTER ).
>> YEAH, BUT I, OBVIOUSLY, KNEW "FATHER OF THE BRIDE," "THREE
AMIGOS," "DIRTY ROTTEN SCOUNDRELS."
( APPLAUSE ).
>> WHEN WE MET IN THE HALLWAY, SHE CAME UP TO ME AND SAID, "I'M
SO HONORED TO MEET YOU, ANGELA LANSBURY.
>> Stephen: WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST IMPRESSION OF SELENA,
MARTY?
>> I MET HER IN THE MAKEUP CHAIR THE FIRST DAY WE SHOT.
AND I WAS RIGHT AWAY STRUCK BY THIS BEAUTIFUL, ENGAGING, AND
RIGHT AWAY CHARMING PERSON.
>> Stephen: REALLY?
>> IT WAS A-- IT WAS A VERY EASY SHOOT THAT WAY.
BECAUSE WE ALL-- I THINK THE THREE OF US LIKE TO WORK IN
GREAT EAVES, AND SHE WENT RIGHT ALONG.
I DIDN'T KNOW HER.
YOU COULD HAVE BEEN HORRIBLE.
>> I KNOW.
I'M GLAD I'M NOT.
>> NO, NO.
>> Stephen: WE HAVE TO TAKE A QUICK BREAK, BUT STICK AROUND.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE STEVE MARTIN, MARTIN SHORT, AND
SELENA GOMEZ, EVERYBODY.
( APPLAUSE ).
♪ ♪ ♪