Meghan has claimed over and over again that she's a feminist and she stands for women's
rights.
But interactions like this one, not reaching out to this woman, cast serious doubts over
that statement.
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The clip that I want you to check out is this one.
Meghan and Harry are talking with some attendants to this event, and at some point she just
steps in inside the group to greet the two men that were standing opposite her.
I guess you noticed that in the middle of both greetings she turned around to see this
woman, and nodded without extending her hand.
Now, to decipher these kind of riddles, we have to borrow a little from game theory,
that helps a lot with body language analysis.
Because there is always the possibility that Meghan had already greeted the woman before,
so she did not need to greet her again.
That would make sense, right?
But there are a few contradictions with that.
First, the fact that she nodded towards the woman, or acknowledged her in the middle of
greeting the two men.
The fact that she nodded to the woman is because the woman is important or relevant in some
way.
Well, if she is in that circle, of around 9 people, then you know that her rank or status
would be similar to those around her.
This is important to consider and part of the natural dynamics of a group.
In every scenario that involves large groups of people, you're gonna see that these circles
naturally form over time.
And the size of the people circles always max out at seven or eight, before they collapse
into smaller groups.
This is natural dynamics in human behavior because it's very difficult to have any relevant
interaction between seven or eight people at the same time.
Between three and five, that's the sweet spot.
You can use this information the next time you're at a meeting, or a networking event.
If you want to enter groups and present yourself, always aim for groups of three or four.
That way, when your enter that group, it will remain stable.
But I was also mentioning that groups will naturally form around people with the same
rank, or experience, or status, or fame... you name it.
Of course, people that already know each other will naturally form groups too.
So in any way or another, these kind of groups form with people that have something in common.
So, if this woman was in this group, it's because she's at the same level of everyone
there.
Again, this is natural behavior of groups.
At some point I thought that she could be one of the hosts of the event.
That she could be introducing these gentlemen, and she's telling Meghan who they are, or
their names.
But we cannot see her speaking.
But, if she's actually introducing them, there is no reason for Meghan to make such a long
pause, looking at her.
If I'm the woman, And I'm introducing them, I name man number one, and then name man number
two, and there is no reason why Meghan would have to make that full stop to acknowledge
what I was saying.
Especially, because you see that Meghan was proactive and just went inside the circle
to greet these two men.
Meahwhile Harry, well...
I think he was just being himself, there.
Now, I want to make a very important remark about why, what Meghan just did is not good
etiquette, under any circumstance.
When you're in a circle of people, that is more than six or seven people, you CAN get
closer to some of them, shake hands, that's alright, but you should go back to your space,
so to speak.
And this is regardless your rank.
It doesn't matter if you're the Duchess of Montecito.
Meghan stepped in, shook hands and began to talk to them, staying in the middle of the
circle.
When you do that, you're physically cutting everyone else out of the interaction.
You're making yourself the literal center of attention, especially because you're effectively
breaking the interaction circle.
And even if the circle is not going to break instantly, the people that are not Meghan
or these two men, are going to feel uncomfortable.
A better approach, as I mentioned, is to reach out, shake hands, mention that you would like
to talk to them later, and go back to your space.
That is being a civilized person.
And to prove my point, Harry gives a perfect example of how should this be done.
He reaches out to shake hands with a man in the other side of the circle, and as soon
as he does that, both of them go back to their places.
That's how it's done.
Shiny golden star for Harry today.
Now, there's this other gentleman to the right of Harry.
Let's call him Blue Tie Man.
He actually makes a gesture like he's introducing the second man to Meghan.
But the fact is that Meghan was already facing and going for the handshake with the second
man BEFORE Blue Tie Man began the introducing gesture.
Blue Tie Man could be the host in this case, or part of the team of organizers because
he's beside Meghan and Harry.
And it makes sense that he's presenting these two men.
Now, I understand that these kind of interactions can be hard to follow, let alone analyze,
especially if we don't know who most of the people are, but these exercises are important
precisely because we need to be able to read a room in seconds.
And I must confess that this was something that really triggered anxiety in me, many
years ago.
Because when I attended an event like this, the first thing that came to my mind was,
"I don't know anyone".
And for an introvert, you know how taxing these kind of social situations can be.
But in reality, you don't have to know the people.
You just have to know how to read the room.
Once you learn to spot these kind of interactions, starting with the knowledge that you just
acquired about groups and circle numbers, it makes so much easier to navigate situations
like this.
Of course, they can be really difficult, especially when you should keep track of the body language
of many people at once.
It is possible, but you should start with exercises such as this one.
And making good use of body language signals like this.
How Meghan treats people differently.
The first man... she leans in, she looks straight into his face, and she does a... rather genuine
smile.
But what happens when she turns to face the woman?
Well, there is one very important principle in regards of the axes of the body.
Our attention and interest is defined mainly by the invisible arrow that points from our
chest forward.
It doesn't matter where the person's head is pointing.
Their attention and interest is defined by their chest direction, and this is especially
relevant if the people are standing, such as this case.
So, Meghan acknowledges the woman, but just with her head.
She doesn't extend her hand, or turns her body in her direction.
It could have been just a few degrees.
But no, Meghan is stiff.
Also, notice that when greeting both men, Meghan relaxes her neck.
This is important because when she nods to the woman, she almost covers her own neck
completely with her chin.
I mention this all the time.
Try to mimic this pose and you tell me if it feels comfortable.
That's the posture you assume when you are threatened.
That's why Harry has his chin down all the time, like in this case, being hunched and
covering his belly.
He's almost always in that terrified state.
Especially when Meghan is getting away with this kind of behavior.
So, let's say that I'm wrong.
And that there is a very good reason why Meghan did not extend her hand to this woman.
Then...
why did Meghan feel threatened by her?
And she cannot escape the fact that she was projecting that.
The most ironic part is that this was a women's empowerment event.
And Meghan calls herself a feminist all the time.
And that she's all out for these kind of initiatives.
But then, we got ten seconds of Meghan not extending her hand to this woman, even showing
signs of being threatened by her, and at the same time staying in the center of the circle
to talk, well...
She keeps using those words, "women empowerment", but...
I don't think they mean what she thinks they mean.
If you want to refine your observation skills, all you have to do is download my 100+ body
language tips, right in the description of this video.
My name is Jesús Enrique Rosas and it will always be a pleasure, my body language buddies!
Much Love, and Bliss.