>> YEAH.
ALL RIGHT.
HAPPY MONDAY, EVERYONE.
[APPLAUSE]
>> STILL THE WEEKEND FOR SOME OF
THESE PEOPLE.
I HOPE YOU HAD A DECENT WEEKEND,
BUT NOT TOO DECENT, FOUND WHAT I
IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
GOOD TO SEE BILL HAMMERS WITH US
[APPLAUSE]
>> BY THE WAY, THANKS FOR HAVING
ME OVER.
>> WELCOME.
>> YEAH.
SO THAT IS NOT PHOTO SHOPPED.
ALL RIGHT.
SO THE LEFT TO MAINTAIN THEIR
OFTEN UNFORTUNATE POLICE, THEY
HAVE TO ASSUME THE VERY WORSE
ABOUT THE PEOPLE THEY CLAIM TO
DEFEND.
REMEMBER, IT’S THE PARTY THAT
TOLD YOU BLACKS CAN’T GET IDs.
BUT ALSO THE POOR THAT THEY
STEAL, RIGHT?
THAT’S WHAT WE ALWAYS HERE AT
NYC.
THAT AND GUNSHOTS.
BUT WHENEVER GOODS ARE STOLEN,
THE DEMOCRATS WILL SAY IT’S
BECAUSE THE PEOPLE STEALING
CAN’T AFFORD TO BUY THEM, EVEN
THOUGH THE OF THESE SELL THE
STOLEN CRAP IMMEDIATELY AFTER
IT’S GRABBED.
REMEMBER THE LOOTING HAPPENED,
AOC WAS SAYING IT’S ’CAUSE THE
POOR NEEDED THIS STUFF.
IF ANYBODY THESE A DIAPER, IT’S
HER.
SHE’S SO FULL OF CRAP.
OF COURSE, MOST POOR PEOPLE DO
NOT STEAL.
HOW MUCH MONEY YOU HAVE HAS
NOTHING TO DO WITH HOW HONEST
YOU ARE.
THE PROBLEM HERE IN NEW YORK IS
CLEAR.
STEALING IS SIMPLY INCENTIVIZED
SO THE ALREADY CRIMINALIZED
SIMPLY GET MORE CRIMINALLY.
AND I INVENTED THAT WORD,
CRIMINALLY.
IT’S NOT LIKE POOR, DECENT
PEOPLE JUST EMBARKED ON A LIFE
OF CRIME BECAUSE WALGREENS GOT
LAZY.
NO, WE OR OUR LIBERAL D.A. JUST
MADE RECIDIVISM ACCEPTABLE.
TAKE NEW YORK’S INFAMOUS THIEF
WHO LED THE LEAGUE IN
SHOPLIFTING BUS WITH 46
ARRESTEES.
FOUR MORE AND HE GETS A FREE
TOASTER WHICH IS WEIRD ’CAUSE HE
ALREADY STOLE SEVEN.
IT WASN’T POVERTY THAT DROVE
HIM.
I’M GUESSING HE DROVE HIMSELF,
PROBABLY IN A STOLEN LEXUS.
BUT DID HE USE THE PRODUCTS HE
STOLL LIKE EVERY DEMOCRATS
CLAIM?
NO.
HE FLIPPED THE BOOTY FOR CASH.
I KNOW THIS FOR A FACT BECAUSE I
BOUGHT IS IT MEN SPEED STICKS
OFF HIM.
WHAT CAN I SAY?
HAVE YOU EVER DIPPED THEM IN RANCH DRESSING?
RANCH DRESSING?
THEY’RE DE-LIBERIA US -- A NEW Y
LIFE ALERT INTERVIEWED THE GAME
-- THAT WAS A JOKE AND HE SAID
EVERYTHING THAT YOU KNEW TO BE
TRUE, HE KEPT ROBBING ONLY
BECAUSE HE COULD KEEP ROBBING,
THANKS TO THE SOFT CRIME
PROSECUTORS.
HE ROBBED WALGREENS SO OFTEN, HE
BRING IN HIS OWN REUSABLE BAG.
I DON’T BLAME HIM.
IF ESSENTIAL DID PAY FOR THE
GOODS, IMAGINE THE LENGTH OF HIS
RECEIPTS.
THOSE ARE LONG FROM ALL -- I
DON’T UNDERSTAND IT EITHER.
ISAAC RODRIGUEZ ROBBED ONE
WALGREENS AT LEAST 37 TIMES LAST
YEAR.
THIS GUY WAS ON CAMERA MORE THAN
-- IN THE LAST TWO YEARS.
HE’LL BE ACTUALLY SUBBING FOR
KILMEADE ON FOX & FRIENDS
WEEKENDS.
YOU CAN MOVE THAT DOWN.
THAT’S STUPID.
BUT HE STOLE EVERYTHING FROM PRO
TEEN DRINKS TO BODY LOTION,
WHICH WHEN YOU MIX TOGETHER IT MAKES A DELICIOUS YOGURT.
MAKES A DELICIOUS YOGURT.
YES, HE ALSO STOLL TAM UPON --
BUT THEN AGAIN, MEN CAN NOW HAVE
BABIES, WHY NOT PERIODS.
HE THEN STOLE THE STUFF ON
STREETS AND PAWN SHOP AND CASH.
AND HE KEPT GOING BECAUSE OF THE
REVOLVING DO JUSTICE SYSTEM THAT
KEPT HIM IN BUSINESS WHILE
PUTTING STORES OUT OF BUSINESS.
THIS NEW CRAZE WAS BROUGHT TO
YOU BY REFORM GOT RID OF
PRETRIAL DETENTION, WHICH
INCLUDES GRAND LARCENY.
THIS IS WHY CRIMINALS LIKE THIS
DUDE COULD BE CAUGHT OVER AND
OVER ONLY TO BE RELEASED LIKE A
LAKE TROUT ON A FISHING SHOW.
MEANWHILE IF YOU WONDER IN AN
OPEN DOOR IN THE CAPITOL, YOU
MIGHT STILL BE IN JAIL SIX
MONTHS LATER.
ONLY IF THEY ATTACK THE
COURTHOUSE -- 42%
AND 51% RESPECTIVELY COMPARED TO
THE SAME TIME LAST YEAR.
AND IN THIS PRECINCT, GRAND
LARCENIES ARE UP 99%.
THAT’S ALMOST DOUBLE.
THANK YOU.
EVEN JANET YELLEN COULD FIGURE
THAT OUT.
ISAAC BOASTED I MAY HAVE GOT
CAUGHT 46 TIMES, BUT I GOT AWAY
A LOT MORE THAN THAT.
FINALLY GOT NAILED FOR RIPPING
OFF A STORE WHERE THERE WAS
ALREADY AN ORDER OF PROTECTION
AGAINST HIM.
AND THAT’S THE AMAZING PART,
REALLY.
THAT YOU ACTUALLY HAVE TO GET AT
LETTER FROM A COURT IN ADVANCE
IN ORDER FOR THEM TO STOP A
CRIMINAL.
HOW INSANE IS THAT?
BUT THIS IS HOW INCENTIVE AND
DISTRICT
DISINCENTIVES WORK.
CRIMINALS REACTED EXACTLY AS
YOU’D EXPECT.
SO CAN YOU BLAME THE THIEVES?
APPARENTLY, WE’RE NO LONGER
ALLOWED TO.
MAYBE THAT’S HOW IT GOES.
AND YOU WONDER WHAT EVEN HAPPENS
WHEN THE COPS DECIDE TO IN
INTERROGATORY THESE PERPS.
>> OKAY.
DEBRA, I’LL KEEP THIS BRIEF.
WE CAUGHT YOU 35 TIMES STEALING
FROM THIS WEEK.
>> BUT IT WASN’T ME, THOUGH.
>> WE HAVE YOU ON TAPE.
LOOK.
HERE’S A PICTURE OF YOU STEALING
TIES FROM JC PENNY.
>> THIS IS LOOKS NOTHING LIKE
ME.
>> WE ALSO CAUGHT YOU ON CAMERA
STEALING A MONKEY HEAD FROM THE
NATURAL HISTORY MUSEUM.
>> I WOULD NEVER WEAR THAT.
>> YOU’RE WEARING THE SAME THING
RIGHT NOW.
>> YOU’RE WEARING THE SAME
THING.
>> WE ALSO CAUGHT YOU STEALING A
MALE MODEL FROM THE
INTERNATIONAL HOUSE OF MALE
MODELS.
>> HE HIT ON ME.
>> NO, THAT’S THE BIGGEST LIE I
EVER HEARD.
YOU EXPECT ME TO BELIEVE THAT?
>>, HEY, BABY.
YOU READY TO GET OUT OF HERE?
>> WELL, I’LL BE DAMMED.
>> THEY MAKE A BEAUTIFUL COUPLE.
[APPLAUSE]
>> SO THE QUESTION IS WITH ALL
THIS STEALING GOING UNARRESTED
-- IS THAT A WORD?
WHY ARE WE PAYING FOR THINGS?
ARE WE THE SUCKERS OR WHAT?
IN THIS NEW WORLD, YOU’D BE
STUPID NOT TO STEAL.
LIKE YOU’D BE STUPID TO PAY YOUR
STUDENT LOANS BACK.
I MEAN, HOW IS THAT NOT
WHOLESALE THEFT.
THE GOVERNMENT REACHING INTO
YOUR POCKET TO PAYING OFF
SOMEONE’S DEBT.
IN THAT CASE YOU’RE THE
DRUGSTORE AND THE GOVERNMENT
JUST WALKED IN AND CLEANED OUT
THE REGISTER.
[APPLAUSE]
>> SHE LOOKS LIKE A STOCK
PHOTOGRAPH IN A PICTURE FRAME
YOU BUY AND PRETEND SHE’S YOUR
GIRLFRIEND.
OUR COHOST.
>>
[APPLAUSE]
>> I CAN’T IMAGINE HOW MANY DOG
PICTURES HE HAS TO LOOK AT EVERY MORNING.
AMERICA’S NEWSROOM COAN COR.
>> AND THIS MAN IS SO BRIGHT, HE
KICKS OUT OF MOVIE THEATER.
AND BEST SELLING AUTHOR OF THE
BOOK WOKE.
[APPLAUSE]
AND SHE’S LIKE A SOUR PATCH KID,
SWEET ON THE INSIDE AND OFTEN
FOUND STUCK TO THE THEATER
FLOOR.
KAT TIMPF
[APPLAUSE]
>> BILL, GREAT TO SEE YOU.
YOU HAD A NICE TEN DAYBREAK FROM
DOG PICTURES.
>> IT’S STILL ONLINE, GREGG.
>> HE WAS SENDING THEM.
I TOLD EVERYBODY THAT YOU WERE
SUSPENDED FROM FOX.
>> SO I HEARD.
>> ARE YOU GETTING TIRED OF
HEARING -- IS IT WEIRD HOW WE DO
THIS STORY OVER AND OVER AGAIN
AND NOTHING HAPPENS.
>> THIS IS KIND OF LIKE WE’RE
LIVING OUR OWN LITTLE SCIENCE
EXPERIMENT.
BACK IN GRADE SCHOOL WHEN THE
TEACHER SAYS WE HAVE A SCIENCE
FAIR, GO HOME AND COME UP WITH A
PROJECT.
THEY CAME UP WITH A PROJECT ALL
RIGHT.
IT INCLUDES LENIENT SENTENCES,
OPEN THE BORDER, LEGALIZE DRUGS
AND MAKE STREETS HOMELESS.
THAT’S JUST NEW YORK.
>> I KNOW.
>> SO WE’RE THREE YEARS INTO
THIS EXPERIMENT.
LET’S CALL IT THAT SCIENCE
EXPERIMENT AND WE’LL FIND OUT IN
NOVEMBER HOW PEOPLE ARE GAUGING
HOW IT’S GOING.
>> WHAT IF YOU AND I DECIDED TO
GO OUT TO A DRUGSTORE AND
SHOPLIFT?
MA P WHAT WOULD HAPPEN TO US?
>> THIS DUDE IS THE LEADER.
>> I KNOW.
>> 37 TIMES IN ONE SHOP.
>> YOU THINK WE’D BE TREATED THE
SAME OR DIFFERENTLY IF WE DID
IT?
IF WE WENT IN.
HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT ABOUT THAT
WHEN YOU’RE IN THERE?
>> I HAVEN’T CONSIDERED THAT,
GREGG.
BUT I WOULD SUGGEST THAT IF
THEY’RE THIS LENIENT, YOU CAN DO
IT.
>> I’M JUST JOKING.
I WAS THINKING OUT LOUD.
>> MUSING OUT LOUD.
>> EMILY, VERY GOOD.
YOU’RE A LAWYER AND YOU’RE FROM
WASHINGTON.
DID YOU SEE THAT PEOPLE ARE NO
LONGER STOPPING?
IS IT THE STATE OF WASHINGTON?
THE POLICE ARE TRYING TO -- THEY
TURN THIS SIRENS ON.
YOU DON’T HAVE TO PULL OVER
ANYMORE.
THAT’S ANOTHER INCENTIVE TO KEEP
DRIVING.
>> THAT’S RIGHT.
AND ACTUALLY, THE SIMILAR
ANALOGY OF THAT IS GOING ON IN
THE SOUTHERN BORDER.
WHICH THAT THE LAW STATES IN
YOU’RE A JUVENILE DRIVER LAW
ENFORCEMENT THERE -- WHICH IS
WHY THE CARTELS HAVE NOW
ENLISTED JUVENILE DRIVERS FOR
THEM.
THE POINT IT LEADS TO BAD NEWS.
I HAVE TO SAY BACK ON THIS
LEAGUE MVP, THE IRONY TO ME IS
THAT PART OF THE ADVOCACY BY THE
PROGRESSIVE ELEVENTH-- THAT DE
DEDETERIORATES HUMANITY.
HE HAS 200 DAYS LEFT ON HIS
SENTENCE.
I’M NOW CLEAN, I’M SOBER.
HE’S GETTING HIS GED.
HE SAYS I WOULD HAVE DIED IF I
STAYED ON THE STREET.
HE SAID THIS IS A BLESSING IN
DISGUISE.
>> I HOPE HE WAS TELLING THE
TRUTH BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO
SEPARATE THE PERSON FROM THE LIE
AT SOMETIMES.
BY THE WAY, YOU CAN JUST SAY
GED.
YOU DON’T HAVE TO SPELL IF OUT.
G-E-D.
I WAS GOING, IS THIS FOR REAL?
HE’S GOING TO GET OUT.
BY THE WAY, OBVIOUSLY YOU CAME
AT THE RIGHT TIME.
WOKE.
GREAT BOOK.
WHY ARE COMPANIES SPEAKING --
YOU DON’T REALLY HERE THE
COMPANIES THAT ARE BEING
VICTIMIZED.
WHY IS THAT?
I THINK THEY’RE APOLOGIZING FROM
THE PEOPLE.
YOU CAN STEAL A LITTLE BIT FROM
OUR SHOP BUT GET THE REGULATORS
OFF OUR BACK.
SO THIS IS A GAME THE COMPANY’S
PLAYED.
I THINK FOR A BUSINESS GUY, THE
INCENTIVE THING IS RIGHT.
MORE INCENTIVE TO COMMIT CRIMES.
I DO THINK THERE’S ONE MORE
ELEMENT TO THIS AND I THINK IT’S
IMPORTANT.
IS THAT YOU HAVE A PHILOSOPHY
BEHIND BLM, BEHIND CLEAR THE
JAILS, BEHIND DEFUND THE POLICE
MOVEMENT.
THE SYSTEM IS SO CORRUPT.
THE SYSTEM IS SO RACIST.
>> YES.
>> THAT YOU ACTUALLY JUSTIFY
WHEN DO YOU IT.
YOU’RE STICKING IT TO THE
SYSTEM.
YOU’RE DOING THE RIGHT THING.
AND I THINK THE REASON A LOT OF
CRIMINAL DOESN’T STEAL IS
BECAUSE THEY WOULDN’T PUT IN
JAIL.
>> RIGHT.
>> IF THEY FEEL LIKE THEY’RE THE
HEROES AND DO SOMETHING RIGHT --
THAT’S WHAT’S GONG.
YOU FEEL LIKE YOU HAVE THIS
HEROES IS CARRYING OUT A
JUSTIFIED CAUSE AND I DON’T
THINK WE’RE TALKING ABOUT
ENOUGH.
>> IT’S INTERESTING.
IF YOU DO BELIEVE THAT THIS
COUNTRY IS HOPELESS LEON
PRESSIVE, THEN DOING ANYTHING TO
STRIKE AGAINST IT, IT MAKES YOU
A HERO.
KAT, BUT YOU’RE LIKE ME, RIGHT?
DO YOU GET THAT LITTLE TO MY
KNOWLEDGE T -- YOU’RE BUYING AN
OINTMENTS, WHATEVER.
TALKING ABOUT ME.
>> YEAH.
>> EVERY NOW AND THEN I GOT TO
GET OINTMENTS.
>> ALL I DO IS BUY OINTMENTS.
>> OINTMENTS ARE THE UNDERRATED
OIL BASED PRODUCTS.
>> I DON’T THINK THEY’RE OVER OR
UNDER.
THEY’RE JUST OINTMENT.
THEY’RE EXACTLY WHAT THEY ARE.
>> THERE’S APPOINTMENT TO MY
OINTMENT.
AND THAT IS WHAT IS IT ABOUT THE
REST OF US?
IT’S A COROLLARY TO PEOPLE WHO
PAY THEIR COLLEGE TUITION AND
SOMEBODY GETS PAID OFF.
IT’S LIKE BEING IN A DRUGSTORE
AND THAT GUY GETS TO WALK OUT
WITH A BAG BECAUSE YOU’RE GOING
TO PAY FOR IT.
>> THERE’S NEVER BEEN A BETTER
TIME TO STEAL.
>> YES.
>> BECAUSE YOU EVEN LOOK AT THIS
GUY?
HE WAS FAMOUS FOR STEALING.
>> YES.
>> AND IN THE PAST, THAT MIGHT
HAVE BEEN A BIG PROBLEM.
>> RIGHT.
>> YOU WOULDN’T WANT PEOPLE TO
KNOW THAT YOU WERE THE GUY
FEELING THE MOST STUFF.
>> EXACTLY.
>> NOW IT DOESN’T MATTER.
YOU CAN HONESTLY -- IT’S A GREAT
CAREER.
THERE’S -- YOU COULD SET UP A
BOOTH AT THE CAREER FAIR.
I’M THE GUY WHO STEALS ALL THIS
STUFF AND NOBODY WOULD DO
ANYTHING.
>> YEAH.
>> YOU COULD EVEN STEAL THE
LITTLE TENT.
>> THAT’S RIGHT.
YEAH.
THAT GUY WHO’S MAKING THOSE
TENTS IS MAKING A LOT OF MONEY,
RIGHT?
>> OH, YEAH.
THE COVID TENTHSS OUT THERE.