Every week on our show during the election process,
we like to talk to a different segment of the American populous
to get their take on this year's election.
Here to represent the small but formidable voting block
of former presidents of the United States of America
is former president of the United States of America,
George W. Bush.
-(applause and cheering) -(presidential fanfare plays)
(applause and cheering swell)
Nice to see you, Chris.
Nice to see you, too. Thank you for coming.
How are you?
Glad to be here. Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.
You're a very distinguished panel. Yeah.
Yeah. How are you? How are you?
How are you? How are you?
Had a...
-(applause and cheering) -Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you. Thank you for coming, Mr. President.
Very nice to have you here.
Hello, Chris.
Hello, my fellow Americans.
And hello, people of online, especially...
especially @weedboner69.
(laughter)
He's a funny guy, Chris.
-You should have him on. -All right, well,
we'll definitely consider that, but I have to say,
it is a real honor to have you on this program.
This legitimizes what we do here. Thank you for coming.
Well, thank you. Thank you. First of all, Chris,
I'd just like to just say something
-about my cousin Billy Bush. Uh... -(laughter)
He's been in the news a lot lately, uh,
him and that disgraced pumpkin, Donald Trump, uh,
talking on that bus.
And I... I just... I just want to say one thing.
-We Bushes don't act like that, okay? -(laughter)
We, uh... we have standards.
And we're, uh, we're raised a certain way.
And we would never,
under any circumstances,
ride a bus.
You know, when you're-when you're a Bush,
you ride in a limousine or a Jumpjet.
Or maybe a monster truck called Sasquatch Express.
But, uh, you know,
never a bus. It-it boggles the mind.
Yeah, well, listen, there's a very important distinction,
and I... you know, it's too bad we didn't
find out about that earlier, but a lot of Republicans
have come out against Donald Trump, so...
People are confused about where you stand.
Where do you stand?
Well, I'll tell you what, Chris, uh,
this-this dunderhead is making me look great, you know?
Yeah.
I mean, did-did you see where I.. where I hugged
Michelle Obama a few weeks ago?
-You see that? -Well, I...
I see where she's almost kind of making a snarky face
and trying to hug you, but you're not really giving back.
I mean, I'm-I'm kind of affectionately
-leaning into her, like, "Aw..." -Yeah, I guess maybe
a little bit, yeah, you're...
giving her a little lean, but she's sort of...
I think we're both feeling like, "This is nice."
I don't know if that... I mean, the look on her face
is sort of like, "Can you (bleep) believe this over here?"
I mean, it's, like, a little... It seems... I...
You know what, though, I don't want to take it away.
I guess it is a sweet moment, it's a sweet moment.
Well... well, it was.
And, uh, I don't know why
you're-you're trying to debunk it.
-It was a sweet moment. -No, I'm not. I apo...
-Sorry, I apologize. -And let's face it--
the Internet ate it up like a... like a two-for-one deal
at the Cheesecake Factory.
Which, by the way, is a good restaurant
with terrific snacks and appetizers.
And I recommend their cheesecake, Chris.
Oh, well. Good recommendation.
Uh...
I mean, ev-everyone... you go to Cheesecake Factory,
-why-why dick around, you know? -Yeah, it's good. Don't...
-Just go right... -Just go right to it,
-Just go right to it. -Yeah, yeah. I mean...
-There's no reason... -No, you're right,
you're absolutely right. It's not...
It's not Chicken Factory
-or Steak Factory. -Exactly.
-You're the only one who gets it, man. -Yeah.
-I'm upset now. -I mean, I...
That picture was so cute, even I almost forgot
about how I invaded Iraq over WMDs that weren't there.
I destabilized an entire region, Chris,
but... but no one seems to care anymore.
And, uh...
thanks to the-the bozo Trump here,
uh, yeah,
folks have forgotten about how I tanked the economy
or how I-I didn't get bin Laden.
Heck, you know, Kanye West even said I hated hurricanes.
But... all forgotten now.
-You know? -All gone. Yeah, it's all good, so...
Okay, so, this is an interesting thesis statement.
You're saying Trump is improving your image.
So, does that... does that mean that you're supporting him?
He-he's a-he's a dangerous man, Chris.
And, uh, back in Texas, where I'm from,
bo-born and raised...
you don't talk about women the way he does.
We-we got a... got a funny kind of justice down there.
Uh, some might even say it's illegal.
But, uh, but if he ever
tried jammin' his Tic Tac-covered cow tongue
down a lady's throat in Texas,
we'd give him what we call the Amarillo steak and eggs.
That's where, uh, that's where you cook him up
a nice T-bone steak, medium rare,
with scrambled eggs and a side of grits,
and then you drag him with your truck.
-HARDWICK: Oh, okay. All right. -Yeah.
Good to know. That's just what...
That's how... that's how they do it.
And now he's saying the election's rigged.
The only thing that's rigged
is-is that stuffed chupacabra on top of his head.
I don't know how he keeps it on there,
but I-I sure hope Hillary knocks it off.
-(cheering, applause) -Yeah. -HARDWICK: Oh. Oh, well, that...
Okay, that's... that's really interesting.
So that-so that means you're endorsing Hillary, then?
Well, I... well, eh... I...
Look... I'm not the decider, Chris.
Yeah, I know, but I just... I feel like so many Bushes
have already indicated their support,
including your daughter Barbara Bush,
your wife Laura Bush,
your father and former president George H.W. Bush,
Gavin Rossdale, the lead singer of Bush,
the dog from the Bush's Baked Beans ad,
almost every roller coaster operator at Busch Gardens,
this Bush near the I-80 outside Akron.
So... what about this last square here?
What about George W. Bush? Are you endorsing Hillary?
What are you doing?
-Look at my wife's hat. -Well...
That wa... I-I was asking if you're...
-She looks almost Britishy, you know? -Yeah, yeah, she...
She-she looks very Britishy, but I-but I was asking
-who you're supporting, and... -I'm sorry, Chris,
-I wasn't paying attention. I was just... -Okay.
...meresmerized by my...
She... It look like she'd be part of the cast
-of
looks like the cast of
I-Is it a hat that you would think maybe a president
that you might want to see
in the White House would wear, or...
I still don't know what you're driving towards.
-Uh... -Okay, all right.
I'll take world history for 400.
All right.
Fair.
Very fair. Okay.
World history it is.
In the 2016 presidential election,
George W. Bush endorsed this candidate.
Look, Chris...
if Trump takes this thing,
Laura and I have a very comfortable
underground bunker we can move to, okay?
It's got a mini fridge for snacks and sodas
and a much larger walk-in freezer
with thousands of Hungry-Man dinners.
Uh, we have every season
of
so I'm gonna be down there with, uh, Princess Kate
and Nolan Ryan while society gets overrun
by wild dogs and racists.
My advice is don't let that happen, America.
Don't let that sack of rotten sweet potatoes
anywhere near the White House, you know?
-HARDWICK: All right, so... -(cheering, applause)
I mean, those are very strong words.
So, that's a yes for Hillary?
Truth be told, I have...
I have a-a strict no-endorsement policy
since I got burned on a deal before I was governor of Texas.
-Oh, yeah. -Yeah.
Yeah, I remember that.
I mean, I loved... I loved them dang pants.
-Yeah. -It's hard not to, and you now you have a lot of 'em.
President George W. Bush, thank you so much for being here.
Uh, do you have time to stick around and play a game with us
-after the break? -Of course I've got time.
-What-what do you think I'm doing here, Chris? -Okay.
-(cheering, applause) -All... all I have...
Yeah.
I mean, literally,
all I have is time.
I mean, you're gonna be lucky if I even leave today.
Okay, well, I...
I'm glad you're sticking around. We're happy to have you here.
We'll be right back with former president George W. Bush
and more