What should be the centre of your life?
Is it your parents?
Is it your pet dog or pet cat?
Or is it yourself?
Is it money, or your romantic partner?
There are so many things we can derive happiness, ambitions, dreams, and freedom from.
But what if I told you, NONE of these should be the center of your life.
This is probably one of the most important videos I’ll make, so make sure you stay
until the end, because going to talk about what should be the centre of your life.
It’s Your Unlocked Potential, and let’s go!
There is a section in the amazing book “seven habits of highly effective people” By Stephen
Covey that talked about the centre of your life.
I read it many years ago, but I want to share those same ideas, because this concept has
changed my life and my perception of everything.
And I mean EVERYTHING.
The idea is that based on the centre of your life, your perspective and your actions will
be surround a centre.
There are many centres people can choose from in.
It may be money, career, family, possessions, romantic relationship, pleasure, friend, or
yourself.
And the key message for this is that none of these should be the centre of your life.
That sounds ridiculous, doesn’t it?
The first time I read this, I was so shocked.
Because for me, family has always been the utmost priority.
I put family over my pleasure, over money, and over many other things.
It was difficult for me to understand at the time why none of these should be the centre
of my life, but we’ll get into that in later.
Let’s talk about each of the centre and their examples, because we need to understand
each so the concept will make sense later on.
Let us say that money is your centre.
You love money.
We will call it money-centred.
The focus of your life would be money.
When you go grocery shopping, you will think about the cheapest option because you want
to save money.
When your friend asks you to go out to have lunch, you may be thinking about how expensive
eating out is, and you will kindly decline if you’re saving money.
You might pick your future husband or wife because their family is rich.
Whatever it may be, you will be making your decisions surrounding your centre, which is
money.
Now, let us say your centre is your career.
You are willing to go the extra mile and do over time without anyone asking you to.
You may or may not put someone else under the bus due to office politics so you can
climb up.
When you get a call from work on the weekend, you may choose to go to work instead of spending
time with your family.
This is because having a good career and climbing up the corporate ladder is the focus of your life.
This is if you’re career-centered.
If you were family-centred, then on the weekend when you get a call from work, you would decline
because your family as priority.
When you buy a house, you might pick a neighbourhood that is close to a good school.
Because you are thinking of your son or daughter.
What if you are not family-centred, but rather possession-centred.
Using the house example again, you will think about the house itself and how amazing it
looks.
How much you love to own a big, beautiful house.
Or you need to drive an amazing, expensive car.
If you are money-centred, you would think about how much money you can make by buying
this house.
Do you see how the centre of your life shifts your perspective and decision-making?
Your decision is based on what you focus on.
If your centre is romantic relationship, or spouse-centred, you may pick the side of your
partner instead of your family’s.
For example, you may go against the will of your parents and elope.
If you were family-centered, you might not do that, since you prioritize your family
over your romantic relationship.
If you are friend-centred, you will value the opinions of your friend or friends more
than that of your parents, or significant other, or even yourself.
You wouldn’t mind treating your friends to meals, because you’re friend-centered
and not money centered.
Some people are so heartbroken from relationship sometimes, that they neglect many aspects
of their lives (their health, family, work, etc.) – and it is because they’re relationship
or spouse-centered.
Maybe none of these matter to you, and pleasure is your centre.
You want a comfortable life and relax all day - that will be what you will try to achieve
in the long run.
An example of this would be drug addiction.
You are so focused on deriving pleasure from your addiction, you will actively seek out
ways to get your centre.
To fulfill your needs.
Many people have borrowed money or take out loans just to feed their drug addiction.
Family and friends, despite their best efforts, sometimes fail because that person’s centre
is so strong.
For those people that have gotten out of drug addiction, it is because they have found their
new centre.
I have heard of stories where people get off drug addiction because of their spouse or
family.
For them, their family or spouse is more important than their pleasure-centre, despite how tough
it is to stop their addiction.
Lastly, if you focus strongly on yourself, and just yourself - you are self-centred.
This kind of centre is particularly dangerous because you may neglect everything else or
everyone else around you.
Your view comes from only yourself, and this can be detrimental because other people’s
opinion or perspective will not matter.
This type of centre will restrict you from unlocking the true potential you have within.
To get new experience and to learn and improve yourself.
All you would care about is you, you, you, you.
OK, at the start I mentioned that none of these should be your centre.
You might think it is ridiculous and I understand that not many people will agree, but there
is one centre that rise above the rest.
That centre is principle-centred.
What does this mean?
Let us say you are money-centred, when you have lots of money, it makes you happy.
But when you do not have enough money, it makes you miserable.
If you are spouse-centred, being with them will make you happy, but if the relationship
is no longer possible, what will you fall back on?
If you are career-centred, and some misfortune happens to the company or unfair politics
turn on you.
A recession can *click* destroy your career just like that.
Then all those years of hard-work is gone and there may no longer be any motivation
or purpose for you.
Essentially, none of these centres are permanent.
They can always come and go, but principles, they are timeless and will never disappear.
Principles will always be there.
If you focus on principles, no matter what happens, there is always those same principles
to fall back on.
What is this principle you keep talking about?
Principles are honesty, integrity, compassion, love, trust, empathy, proper communication
and so forth.
If you perform your action based on compassion, love and, trust, you are able to see the perspectives
of your family or your friends or your spouse.
You will be able to integrate multiple centres and at the same time you will be doing the
right thing.
When you do your work with honesty and integrity, you will be able to build proper relationship
and make an impact for your career.
These principles will always stay the same, because being honest means being honest.
Unlike people, they do not change.
Unlike materialistic possessions or money, they do not disappear or run out.
At the end of the day, when you are principal centred, you know you are doing the right
thing.
For example, marry your partner because they are honest, kind, loving, caring, and has
good integrity.
Not because they’re rich or have an amazing house or they have a great job.
What would happen if they bankrupt or lose their job and house?
What do you fall back on?
When things go wrong, people may shift from one center to another.
And this can become a vicious cycle just shuffling between money, family, pleasure, romance,
etc.
By being principle-centered, it helps you to stay grounded and you will get through
life easier.
What do I mean?
If someone blamed you or called you names but you didn’t do anything wrong.
You might get really bothered by it.
Why did that person call me this, or attacked me?
But when you are principle-centered, you asked yourself.
Was I honest?
Was I kind?
Was I caring?
If you did all the right things and lived by proper virtues, then you have nothing to
worry about.
It says more about their character and integrity than yours.
Place the center of your life where it should be, on principles and doing the right thing.
At the end of the day, it’s all about balancing the different “centers”.
Balancing between family, money, friends, romance, yourself, many different aspects,
and doing the right thing for all of them.
Hey everyone, don’t click off just yet.
I want thank you so much for watching this video all the way until the end.
It took me some sleepless nights to put out these videos, particularly this one, so if
you enjoyed this video, please like the video and hit the subscribe button with the bell
on if you haven’t yet.
I do recommend everyone to read the book I have mentioned.
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
This particular aspect of the habit really changed my life and the way I do and view things.
So, in a way, this video is quite personal to me.
I do want you to improve and learn as well.
Also check out my other videos on my channel that can help you in other ways.
With that, I want to know what are some of your opinions and thoughts.
What is your current center?
Do you think you will shift your current center to principle-center?
Let me know in the comments section down below.
I really want to know what YOU think.
And I will see you all next Wednesday.
Cheers!
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