>>>
>>> HI
>>> HI EVERYONE. WELCOME BACK TO ATLANTA AND
COMPANY.
COMPANY.
COMPANY. WELL WE ALL HAVE THAT ONE FRIEND
WHO SAYS WHAT'S ON THEIR MIND.
NO MATTER WHO IS AROUND AND HOW
IT MAKES OTHERS FEEL.
ACCORDING TO SOCIOLOGIST PEOPLE
WHO ARE BLUNT ACTUALLY MAKE THE
BEST KINDS OF FRIENDS.
SO WE'RE DISCUSSING THIS TODAY
IN REAL TALK.
THE FOUNDER OF THE BLUNT FRIEND
BRAND EEUCHL HARVEY.
AND TRACY COLLINS.
HI LADIES.
HI LADIES. >> HELLO.
>> HELLO.
>> HELLO. >> HOW'S IT GOING.
DO ANY OF YOU BY SHOW OF HANDS
THE BLUNT FRIEND?
>> I AM DEFINITELY THE BLUNT
FRIEND.
FRIEND.
FRIEND. >> OH.
>> OH.
>> OH. >>
>> OH. >> WHY DO YOU THINK SO?
>> I MEAN ALL MY FRIENDS TELL ME
I TELL IT LIKE IT IS I'M SAY
STRAIGHT SHOOTER, NO CHASER.
YOU'RE GOING TO GET IT STRAIGHT.
I BELIEVE IN TELLING THE TRUTH.
I WOULDN'T BE YOUR FRIEND IF I
DIDN'T TELL YOU THE TRUTH RIGHT.
>> RIGHT.
>> RIGHT.
>> RIGHT. >> WHAT ABOUT YOU GUYS?
>> YEAH, AS MUCH AS I CONSIDER
MYSELF ONE OF THE OPTIMISTIC
ONES IN THE GROUP I'M ALSO THE
MOST REALISTIC.
MOST REALISTIC. I'M GOING TO SAY EXACTLY WHAT'S
ON MY MIND MAYBE PLAY DEVIL'S
ADVOCATE.
ADVOCATE.
ADVOCATE. SO YOU'LL PROBABLY HEAR BOTH
SIDES A POSITIVE BUT ALSO MAYBE
REENFORCING WHAT I THINK IS THE
RIGHT THING.
RIGHT THING. >> WELL I WENT THROUGH A
PERSONAL TRANSFORMATION SO I WAS
ALWAYS THE ONE SUGAR COATING
THINGS.
THINGS.
THINGS. BUT NOW I'M THE ONE.
THIS IS HOW I ALL START IT OUT.
I NEED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT
SOMETHING BUT IT'S COMING FROM A
PLACE OF LOVE BECAUSE IF YOU
DROP THOSE AFFECTIONISMS FROM
THE BEGINNING THEN THEY'RE MORE
LIKELY TO LISTEN TO YOUR ADVICE.
>> RIGHT.
>> RIGHT.
>> RIGHT. ABSOLUTELY.
ABSOLUTELY. >> THAT'S A GOOD POINT BECAUSE
IS THERE EVERY A POINT WHERE YOU
SAY I SHOULDN'T SAY THIS OR YOU
JUST APPROACH IT IN A DIFFERENT
WAY.
WAY.
WAY. >>
WAY. >> I
WAY. >> I THINK IF YOU'RE ALWAYS
COMING FROM A PLACE OF LOVE THAT
YOU'RE NOT GOING TO BE HURTFUL I
THINK SOMETIMES PEOPLE TELLING
THE TRUTH IS HURTFUL BUT IT'S
NOT.
NOT.
NOT. I
NOT. I THINK WHEN YOU LOVE PEOPLE
PURELY AND DEEPLY I THINK YOU
LOVE THEM TO BE THEIR ABSOLUTE
BEST SELF AND FOR THEM TO BE
THEMSELVES YOU WANT TO TELL THEM
THE TRUTH.
THE TRUTH. >> I WAS LISTENING.
>> IS THIS COMING FROM A PLACE
OF LOVE?
OF LOVE?
OF LOVE? >> YES.
>> YES.
>> YES. >> THERE'S NO BLUNTNESS NEEDED.
>> I LOVED IT BUT IT WAS SIMILAR
TO THE FRIENDS TELLING YOU IN
YOUR EAR.
YOUR EAR.
YOUR EAR. >> SURE.
>> SURE.
>> SURE. >> ARE THEY COMING FROM A PLACE
OF LOVE OR ARE THEY COMING FROM
THE INFORMATION THAT YOU WERE
FEEDING TO THEM.
SO BEFORE GIVING A FRIEND
ADVICE, I ALWAYS ASK MYSELF DOES
IT MATTER IN THE BIG PICTURE.
SO FOR EXAMPLE, A BAD BOYFRIEND,
THEY'RE GOING TO FIGURE THAT OUT
ON THEIR OWN BUT IF IT'S HARMING
THEM IN ANY WAY THEN IT'S LIKE
LET'S SIT DOWN AND TALK ABOUT
THIS.
THIS.
THIS. >>
THIS. >> THAT'S A GOOD POINT BECAUSE
I'VE HAD BEFORE A GIRLFRIEND OF
MY WAS DATING A GUY I DID NOT
LIKE AND I WAS THE ONE THAT GOT
IN TROUBLE IN THE END HOW DO YOU
REPAIR THAT FRIENDSHIP AND HOW
DO YOU FEEL OKAY ABOUT TELLING
THEM TOO.
THEM TOO.
THEM TOO. BRING YOUR FRIEND TO THERAPY IS
ALWAYS A GOOD OPTION.
>> WE HAVE INTERVENTION.
>> YEAH.
>> YEAH.
>> YEAH. >> I WAS LIKE WAIT A SECOND.
>> DEPENDS ON HOW THE
RELATIONSHIP AND HOW SHE IS.
SO IF HE SAES TRYING TO FIND A
NEW FRIEND GROUP, MAYBE YOU CAN
GO ALONG WITH HER IN THAT
JOURNEY.
JOURNEY.
JOURNEY. >> I LIKE THAT.
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
>> I THINK WHEN YOU ARE TRYING
TO SALVAGE YOUR FRIENDSHIPS YOU
HAVE TO BE A RESPECTER OF THE
TIME.
TIME.
TIME. SOMETIMES PEOPLE AREN'T READY TO
RECEIVE CERTAIN THINGS THEY
AREN'T READY FOR CERTAIN
INFORMATION I THINK WHEN YOU'RE
A FRIEND YOU HAVE TO BE ABLE TO
GAGE THAT A LITTLE MORE CLEARLY.
>> GAGE WHERE YOUR FRIEND IS
COMING FROM TOO.
>> SOCIOLOGISTS SAY THESE ARE
SOME OF THE REASONS WHY BLUNT
FRIENDS MAKE THE BEST FRIENDS.
YOU'LL ALWAYS KNOW THEY WANT TO
BE YOUR FRIEND.
SO IF YOU'RE NOT HAPPY WITH THEM
I GUESS YOU JUST TELL THEM I
DON'T WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND
ANYMORE.
ANYMORE.
ANYMORE. >> IT'S VERY LOOK YOU KNOW WHERE
I STAND AT ALL TIMES AND IT'S
NOT NECESSARILY ABOUT I WANT TO
GET RID OF YOUR FRIENDSHIP MAYBE
THIS ISN'T THE SEASON FOR US AND
NOW IT'S TIME FOR US TO BOTH GO
AND GLOW AND MAYBE WE WILL COME
BACK TOGETHER AT THIS POINT.
>> YOU ARE VERY MATURE.
>> I CAN AGREE.
>> I'M NOT THE BLUNT FRIEND
MAYBE.
MAYBE.
MAYBE. >>
MAYBE. >> THAT'S THE MOST IMPORTANT
PART WHEN SOMEBODY BECOMES TOXIC
TO YOU.
TO YOU.
TO YOU. IT'S NOT WORKING FOR US.
>> ABSOLUTELY.
>> ABSOLUTELY. >> SOMEBODY WHO I'VE HAD BLUNT
CONVERSATIONS FORMER FRIENDS
THAT IS THE FINAL STRAW.
HERE'S BEHAVIOR THAT I NOTICED
AND I DON'T APPRECIATE.
THIS IS KIND OF WHAT I'M LOOKING
FOR AND BEING OPEN AND HONEST
WITH THEM AND IF THEY WANT TO
CHANGE AND GROW WITH YOU.
>> NOW I HAVE A FRIEND GOING
THROUGH THIS WITH HER PARENTS
AND SO I TOLD HER, I SAID AGAIN,
START WITH THIS COMES FROM A
PLACE OF LOVE.
SO I HAVE DECIDED TO MAKE A
POSITIVE CHANGE IN MY LIFE.
IF YOU HAVE INFORMATION TO SHARE
WITH ME OR IF YOU'RE CALLING TO
GIVE ME SOMETHING POSITIVE PICK
UP THE PHONE, IF YOU'RE NOT, I
CANNOT ALLOW ANYTHING TO BREAK
MY PEACE RIGHT NOW.
>> I ACTUALLY UNDERSTAND THAT.
I KNOW PEOPLE LIKE THAT TOO
WHERE THEY EMOTIONALLY DISTANCE
THEMSELVES FROM THEIR PARENTS
ANY TIME WE HAVE A CONVERSATION
IT'S ABOUT THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED
TO THIS PERSON OR THIS PERSON.
>> AND THAT'S OKAY TO SAY THAT.
YOU CAN SET BOUNDARIES WITH ANY
FRIEND OR.
FRIEND OR. >> I LOVE BOUNDARIES.
BOUNDARIES KEEP US SAFE.
>> AND I TELL YOU WHEN I'M
GETTING NEAR A BOUNDARY.
THERE'S NO PACKS OF
AGGRESSIVENESS ABOUT IT.
>> I LIKE THAT.
I AGREE WITH THIS.
THEY PUSH YOU TO BE BETTER.
>> YEAH.
>> YEAH.
>> YEAH. >> LISTEN, THE BLUNT.
I THINK PROBABLY THE MOST BLUNT
PERSON I HAVE IN MY LIFE IS MY
TRAINER.
TRAINER.
TRAINER. WHEN I TELL YOU EVERY SINGLE DAY
HE PUSHES ME TO BE MY BEST SELF
EVERYTHING I DON'T WANT TO DO HE
MAKES ME DO IT AND SO I THINK
WHEN YOU'RE TRYING TO ACCOMPLISH
GOALS IN YOUR LIFE YOU WANT
PEOPLE WHO ARE GOING TO PUSH YOU
OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE, MAKE
YOU STEP UP, MAKE YOU ELEVATE SO
YOU CAN TACKLE THIS WORLD IN THE
BEST WAY.
BEST WAY.
BEST WAY. >> BUT DO YOU WANT YOUR FRIEND
TO BE YOUR TRAINER.
>> I WANT HER TO BE IN MY LIFE
WHAT YOU'RE DOING RIGHT NOW IS
REALLY STUPID SO YOU SHOULD
PROBABLY.
PROBABLY.
PROBABLY. >> YOU HAVE TO ASK YOURSELF THE
QUESTION DOES YOUR FRIEND HAVE A
HISTORY OF GIVING YOU GOOD
ADVICE BECAUSE IF THEY DON'T.
>> LOOK AT YOUR FRIEND, HOW DOES
HER LIFE LOOK.
>> OH.
>> OH.
>> OH. >>
>> OH. >> CORRECT.
>> CORRECT. >> SO NOW.
>> HE SAYS HE'S NOT GOING.
>> ANOTHER THING THEY SAY IS
BLUNT FRIENDS ARE NOT AFRAID TO
APOLOGIZE.
APOLOGIZE. >> I THINK EVERY TIME AND I
LEARNED THIS LESSON VERY EARLY
ON I DID SOMETHING VERY
INAPPROPRIATE IN THE 4TH GRADE.
AND MY MOTHER MADE ME STAND UP
IN FRONT OF THE CLASS AND
APOLOGIZE THE NEXT DAY AND SHE
SAID APOLOGIZE FOR YOUR ACTIONS
FOR DISRUPTING THE CLASS.
AND FROM THE 4TH GRADE I GOT
ACCOUNTABILITY VERY EARLY AND SO
I THINK THAT WHEN YOU HAVE
PEOPLE LIKE THAT, THEY DO HELP
YOU LEARN THAT YOU HAVE TO
APOLOGIZE WHEN YOU'RE WRONG YOU
HAVE TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR
THOSE MISSTEPS IN YOUR LIFE.
>> I WANT BRANDI'S MOM AS MY
LIFE COACH.
LIFE COACH. >> YOU CAN HIRE HER.
>> NOW I'M GOOD AT ACCEPTING
APOLOGIES I AM HORRIBLE AT
GIVING THEM.
GIVING THEM. IF YOU SPEAK YOUR TRUTH OUTLOUD
I SAY THIS IS SUPER HARD FOR ME
TO DO.
TO DO.
TO DO. >>
TO DO. >> YOU KNOW WHY BECAUSE IT'S
SAYING THAT I'M WRONG AND THAT'S
HARD A LOT OF TIMES.
BUT, AGAIN, IF I SPEAK MY TRUTH
AND SAY I AM GREAT AT ACCEPTING
APOLOGIES, HORRIBLE AT GIVING
THEM BUT I'M GOING TO STEP OUT
OF MY COMFORT ZONE RIGHT NOW AND
TELL YOU I'M SO SORRY.
IT'S LIKE IT BREAKS IT DOWN FOR
ME.
ME.
ME. >>
ME. >> YEAH.
>> YEAH.
>> YEAH. >> IT'S I DON'T KNOW THAT'S WHAT
WORKS FOR ME.
>> YEAH.
>> YEAH.
>> YEAH. ARE YOU EASY TO SAY SORRY?
>> I WOULD SAY I AM VERY
PRIDEFUL.
PRIDEFUL.
PRIDEFUL. NOW I HAVE SOMEONE IN MY LIFE MY
FIANCE BUT SOMETIMES I'LL BE
LIKE THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED
HERE'S THE SITUATION.
HE'S LIKE YOU PROBABLY SHOULD
APOLOGIZE AND I'M LIKE I
PROBABLY COULD OF APPROACHED
THAT FROM A PLACE OF LOVE.
>> YEAH, WE'RE REALLY LEARNING A
LOT TODAY.
LOT TODAY. >> YEAH.
>> YEAH.
>> YEAH. >> OKAY.
>> OKAY.
>> OKAY. REALLY QUICKLY BEFORE WE GO.
TELL ME YOU SAID YOU'VE BEEN
GOING THROUGH A PERSONAL
TRANSFORMATION.
TRANSFORMATION. TELL US ABOUT YOUR BOOK AND WHY
YOU'RE HERE IN ATLANTA.
>> I AM A MEDIA PERSONALITY OF
JACKSONVILLE AND I'VE BEEN IN
THE INDUSTRY FOR 30 YEARS AND
WHAT PEOPLE DIDN'T KNOW IS THAT
I WAS A TRAGIC BING DRINKER
BEHIND THE SCENES AND BECAUSE I
WAS ABLE TO KEEP IT A SECRET I'M
THE MOST DANGEROUS OF ALL
BECAUSE WE'RE THE ONES YOU FIND
DEAD AND YOU HAD NO IDEA THERE
WAS A PROBLEM.
SO FORTUNATELY I WENT TO
TREATMENT AND I STARTED
EVALUATING WHAT WAS GOING ON.
WHY DIDN'T I ASK FOR HELP ALL
THOSE YEARS AGO WHEN I KNEW I
WAS AN ALCOHOLIC AND WHAT DID
THE OTHER SIDE LOOK LIKE.
SO I WROTE A BOOK CALLED
STUMBLING INTO SOBRIETY.
AND I WALK YOU THROUGH THE AHA
MOMENTS AND THE BAD ONES TOO AND
YOU GET TO LEARN WHAT THE OTHER
SIDE LOOKS LIKE AND HOPEFULLY
CHANGE SOME LIVES AND I CAN TELL
YOU IN JACKSONVILLE THIS HAS
HAPPENED ALREADY.
HAPPENED ALREADY. THE BOOK IS ON AMAZON.
I KEEP THE COST AS LOW AS
POSSIBLE AT 9.$99.
AND I'M ON A TOUR GIVING IT TO
LIBRARIES AROUND THE COUNTRY SO
PEOPLE CAN GET THE INFORMATION
FOR FREE.
FOR FREE.
FOR FREE. >> THANK YOU FOR SHARING YOUR
STORY AND FOR HELPING OTHERS.
>> AND LADIES THANK YOU SO MUCH
FOR WEIGHING.
FOR WEIGHING. DON'T GO ANYWHERE BECAUSE
TRAINING WITH TRENT IS HERE.