Simon: We are here in Aizu Wakamatsu, in 'Samurai City'.
S: This is 'Samurai City' Martina: [inaudible]
S & M: We are in 'Samurai City'.
S: And we're gonna go to a dojo and we are going to learn how to be samurais.
I've always been told I've got the hair of a samurai. It's time for me to train like one.
M: We're going to be learning 'naginata', which is specifically a female samurai martial arts.
S: Right. M: It's got, like, a long, it's like that long stick that would have a sword at the end.
S: Yup. M: It's for, like, jabbing people like kabobs and stuff.
Hopefully we won't start with the, um, sword part.
S: No. M: But, yeah. I'm, I'm super hyped.
S: This is great. M: In 'Samurai City' learning martial arts (inaudible). S: I'm gonna be a samurai *gurgles with excitement*
*Music box sounds*
Dan(?): (in background) Not so samurai. S: Not so samurai?
D: Yeah. S: They said I'm not so samurai *laughs* *laughing in background*
S: I wanna be a samurai.
I'm too big.
What does '格好いい//kakkoii' mean? Just means 'not samu(rai)' - oh it means 'cool'.
Oohh. Nice. *laughing in background*
Good. Good? Okay.
Background: It looks cool. S: Breathing is not an option in this.
Just can't fully breathe in. Just gonna be shallow breaths the whole time.
I don't know how I look. I really hope this looks awesome.
I feel like this looks awesome.
(singing) 'Cover girl, put that bass in your walk'
I shouldn't be singing 'RuPaul's Drag Race' in a dojo.
*sombre music*
*shouts and grunts*
*shouts*
S: I'm about to get a whoopin'.
*sticks contact each other*
*sigh of shock and relief*
[Warrior Grandma gestures Simon to straighten his leg.]
S: Oh, straight. Ah. 'Koko'.
Straight. AAAH. 'Ko(ko)' - OH.
AAAH, I see. *yells* Okay. Good?
(in shock) Oh NOOOOO. Okay.
*yells* Yeah? WOOOOOOO.
Okay. Good.
*grunts* Okay.
[Warrior Grandmas practice]
M: Up or down?
*Simon grunts*
Okay.
*more grunting*
S: (in background). Okay. Again?
M: This is NOT easy.
S: OH YEAH!
OH YAH! M: Did you get it, Simon?
S: OH YEAH!
M: Did you get it? S: I GOT IT!
M: *shouts* S: MEN!
M: *death sounds*
S: I respect these women so much.
I love this here. I wanna be here every day.
This is it. Goodbye, everybody.
This is my life now.
*Mozart's Eine Kleine Nachtmusik plays*
S: Okay. *thud* *shocked*
*Warrior Grandmas laugh*
*shouts*
S: That was good!
*shouts continue*
Alright. Good.
Yup, you got me. One of them's good.
OoooOOOh.
*even more shouting*
Oh yeah.
I think I'm good. Okay. Lesson over.
No, no, no. No more.
They got some power in 'em. They're strong.
Mmm 'kay. *laughs*
No, we're good. No, no more. No, we're good. Okay.
M: Arigatou gozaimas. I had the most wonderful time ever.
S: I would love to do this some more if I didn't get all the shots to the head.
I feel like my - ringing right now.
M: Are you? I'm, like, way mega re-inspired again 'cause I was in karate for so long.
And I haven't been a part of it forever and I'm just like, the dojo, everything.
S: I saw the passion in your eyes, gurl. I saw how happy when you were doing it. I saw it burnin' in ya. M: The fire went off. Oh my god.
M: You have a burning in your head, of course. S: This was a wonderful, beautiful experience.
M: We had amazing senseis. S: This was and amazing dojo.
S: I highly recommend it. M: Yes. If you can. I mean, just at least come to take a look at the dojo.
S: I really wish you could do this some more, gurl.
S: This seems like a great outlet for you. M: Maybe we'll find a - we gotta find a.
M: I just come home and beat on you with sticks. *laughs*
S: So long as we don't do the helmet-hitting-me-over-and-over-again part. M: But I will.
M: Yes. Now let's go get you some ice for your big, fat head.
S: Yeah. Let's get some water or something. I feel dizzy.
M: MEN!