Time to get back to tonight's challenge.
We've all bought supercars for less than £10,000.
We're doing a number of challenges with them
as we go on one of our frankly an epic voyages from Bristol here
to a lap-dancing bar in Slough about here.
When you look at it like that,
it's not exactly the most arduous journey ever undertaken, is it?
Nevertheless, it's taken us half a day to get to about here,
and so far we've learnt
that James's Lamborghini is rubbish, Jeremy's Maserati is slow
-and my Ferrari-- -Isn't a Ferrari.
-It is! -It is not a Ferrari.
-Be quiet. -It's a...
Let's get back to the action.
While you were away, the cars had their tanks drained
and were then given 25 litres to get them
to the lap-dancing club in Slough, 96 miles away.
To get to Slough with the fuel we've just put in,
we have to average 17 miles to the gallon.
Apparently, yes.
-Which, in a normal car... -No problem.
-...piece of cake. -These aren't entirely normal cars.
To make matters worse, it had become obvious that the lap of Castle Combe
had hurt my engine badly.
This is a half-French, half-Italian car. That's a worry.
When the French and the Italians come together to do cooking, that's great.
But when they come together to make a car, run.
Run for your life.
Now, I'm following Jeremy in his Maserati. I'm doing 48 miles an hour.
and I get the distinct impression that he's going flat out.
Look at that! Overtaken...
For our next challenge, we had to go to a service centre in Chippenham.
-Oh, don't do that! -Yeah, that'll help.
-Right, challenge, I think. -It's just a bit tappety.
-Yeah, both ends. -In the way that a dumper truck is.
-Right. -I would stall.
"You are now in a race.
With no outside help, each of you must change the oil in your car
and all the spark plugs."
These... Actually, come to think of it, you've got a V6.
-We've got V8s. -I've only got six spark plugs.
But I've never held a spanner in my life.
Well, he has, but on old British...
All I have to do now... is demonstrate to you two
why I'm a doctor of engineering, twice.
The good doctor then started work on his spark plugs
rather than changing his oil, which was actually quite dim.
You need it to be hot for the oil to drain 'cause it's thin,
otherwise you get big lumpy bits, in your case full of metal,
hanging around at the bottom...
Oddly, James began by doing housework.
The bonnet is eating my head.
So, the good doctor came up with an engineering solution.
Meanwhile, James had got going and got stuck.
I don't see how I'm going to do that.
While Jeremy had resorted to shouting.
Come on! Come on!
I sound like I'm in a porn film.
Their problem was inaccessible spark plugs.
Not something that was troubling me.
I'm actually dawdling!
I don't want to win by too much!
Oh, I can't get at this one.
Oh, look, it's obscured by this... lead.
You've got mechanic's butt cheeks. Do you know that?
After a brisk 50 minutes, Dr Clarkson had finished changing his plugs.
Yes!
All six.
And set about making a mess of his oil change.
That went well.
Meanwhile, James was being pedantic.
And I was hampered by height issues.
The race to the finish was between me and the doctor.
First to start their engine.
-We've got the times. -They're saying five...
-One hour, 13.2 minutes for you. -Yeah.
13.25 for me. Half a second.
I may have made a bit of a mess there.
Meanwhile...
I'm quite happy doing this if you'd like to sod off.
As we left Chippenham, it became clear
that the pit stop hadn't really done my Maserati much good.
That's a great sound.
Our next challenge was in the town of Marlborough
and all I had to do was get there.
Got at all my dials here. My oil temperature, minus 20.
Fuel, depends on what kind of corner I'm going round.
Time, wrong. Battery, wrong.
Never mind. Could be worse.
This time, James had broken down outside a school at lunch time.
Won't it go, James?
It's broken!
This is humiliating.
What has he done?
The best thing we can do to help James now is just go.
-Go, yeah. -Yes.
Eventually we made it into Marlborough, where the locals could sense the tension
of an upcoming three-way duel.
Supercars are notoriously hard to see out of.
They also have very heavy clutches and very heavy steering,
so, which would be the easiest to park?
Right, we have to park our supercars in this space, against the clock.
And Hammond's first. Are you ready?
Go!
This space is not big enough for this car.
-Is he going to hit? -I'm about right!
-Hooray! -That's a point off!
Are you looking where you're going or using the force?
-Yes! -Two points off!
You know, Ferraris...
-That's it, I'm parked. -Parked, have you?
-It's perfect! -I'll call a cab and get you to the kerb.
Have a little walk down the kerb to your car.
-What time did it take to do that? -One minute, 38.7.
Go!
Next, it was the turn of the poorly Merak.
Eighteen years I lived in London, making this a piece of cake.
There you go! That's a touch!
-That wasn't a touch. -Is it heavy, mate?
Will the engine lasts as long as this manoeuvre?
There! Finished!
-That is so neat. -One minute. One minute.
One minute exactly.