Oh, yeah, um, my Yes, yes, yes, yes. And, yes, let's be real.
When was the last time that you called a woman? I mean, think
about it. Unless you're old school and I respect that. Gone
are the days when you meet a woman ring her up and have an
actual real time conversation, especially these days, texting
is the number one form of communication, especially when
it comes to the early stages of dating. Hello, I'm Caitlin V,
your sex and relationship coach. And today I'm going to share my
seven texting rules to make her want you because messing it up
in the texting stage could be the thing that is stopping you
from taking it to the next level and actually going on a date.
And yes, I'm talking about exchanging messages written in
text that could be on a dating app that might be on WhatsApp
that could be on old fashioned S M S. Even if you've already been
on a few dates with her. The way that you text plays a pretty big
part in determining whether or not she's going to stay
interested. And even if you've been together for a while your
text game may be the difference between getting that peach and
beating your meat. So be sure to stick around to the end because
every single one of these rules is equally important. And if you
keep these rules in mind, while texting, you're going to come
off as charming, as desirable, as confident to the woman that
you're texting. If confidence is something that you struggle
with, then I highly recommend that you check out my sexual
Mastery program high performance males more information on that
in a second. Alright, without further ado, here they are the
seven rules for texting to make her want you number one text
within 24 hours of meeting or metrics This one is easy. If you
meet someone in person, it is important not to let too much
time pass before you text them. This is true of both men and
women. I mean, this is true even in like your job or you go to a
conference or something with your boss. So you definitely
don't want to message her too soon. There's sort of like a
little sweet spot there. Although honestly, I feel like
if you have a great connection with somebody and you want to
honor that connection, you should just message her just
message her don't play ping games just reach out and be
like, Oh my God, it was great to meet you. I'd love to take you
out on a date. If not right then and there. At least send her the
text by the next day while meeting you was still fresh in
her mind. Otherwise you risk just sort of falling into the
background as a guy that she met at one point and she doesn't
remember the specifics of the conversation. Take the pressure
off of yourself. Your first text does not have to be a great
conversation starter. You can keep it simple. In fact, I think
you should just shoot her message that way. She has your
number, let him know it was great to meet her. And then and
this is really important. Make a specific invitation like would
you like to go up to dinner
next Saturday, you could even get ultra specific and say, Hey,
I'd like to take you out for dinner at my favorite
restaurant. In this neighborhood. How does Saturday
at seven work for you. Women love decisiveness
we love when you have a plan in mind. We love that you're
thinking about what you would like to do with us. It
communicates that you're interested. It lets us know that
you're not the type to procrastinate, and it lets me
know that you act on what you want. Take charge when it comes
to your desires. And the reason I love this rule is try to
strike while it's hot, don't Strike the iron is hot. Number
two put in some effort around grammar and spelling. Now this
is not to say that you need to use the King's English or use
perfect grammar speak like yourself Be authentic. If you
don't speak in a certain way in person, then it would be out of
alignment for you to speak that way in your text message. But
what I am saying is that you've got to avoid the shortcuts.
Remember the days of AOL Instant Messenger, I was a baby of the
80s I signed on to aim and waited for my crush to sign on.
And then we would leet speak back and forth to each other
like Hey, cutie, what are you up to? And those days are over. I
think that it shows that you're putting in effort and thought
when you send a well constructed text message that is a full
thought that doesn't use shortcuts that uses punctuation,
maybe an emoji here, they're not to be overused. If you actually
compose this text message as if you care about the communication
that you are sending that sends her a really strong signal that
you care about the quality of what you are doing. We have as
we like to say around here, the way you do one thing is the way
you do anything. And so if you you know shortcut and let your
text messages to her be sloppy and unprofessional or or
impersonal. Then she knows that that's kind of how you're going
to approach dating her. That's how you would approach marrying
her. That's how you would approach having sex with her a
little bit sloppy and rough around the edges. So take the
time especially in those early communications just to polish
them off and send them if they were like beautiful gifts of
your communication that your gift wrapping with a beautiful
bow and then sending off to her looking good. Number three, oh,
this is such a good one mirror her. So when I say mirror her I
don't mean like pulled up looking mirror and look just
like her maybe get your eyelashes done. If that's what
she's into now, I mean, mirror her reflect what she is doing
back to her in your own behaviors. This is the secret to
not giving too much or too little to the person you're
texting. Because I know all y'all are asking like, how do I
know that I'm hitting the proper balance and not texting too
much, or leaving her hanging. Because I'm thinking about her
all the time. Maybe I want to text her all the time. Or the
other hand, maybe I'm super busy. And I don't want her to
think that I'm ghosting her. The secret to this is paying
attention to how much she texts you. And then matching it look
out for how long she takes to respond how long her texts are
in general and how frequent they are. You don't want to be
putting in way more effort than she is or way less effort, it's
totally fine to take the lead and show that you're interested
that is a good thing. But if you are consistently sending full
paragraphs and getting single sentences in response, or you're
consistently messaging her immediately, but it takes her on
average an hour to get back to you, you are probably a little
bit out of sync. Again, it feels authentic and right. And this is
like you're so excited to communicate with her. That's
great. Mirroring her is the best way to ensure she knows you're
interested, she feels your investment. But she doesn't feel
that you are overreaching or that you are leaning back and
being uninvested either, especially in the early days of
texting with someone, it is really important to be mindful
of how much you are giving and receiving from that person. If
you're taking into account the effort that she's putting in,
you have the chance to assess how interested she is. And you
know when to pull backs, or push forward Rule Number Four Do not
disappear. There is nothing more fun than having a great back and
forth banter, text conversation with a person who you are
crushing on the anticipation of staring at the screen thinking
about what you're going to say next. It's delicious. And on the
other hand, there is nothing worse than your crush just
vanishing into thin air in the middle of the conversation. So
if you find yourself having one of those fun back and forth, and
suddenly something comes up, just let her know, just let her
know, Hey, someone came into my office, I'll catch up with you
again later. This simple gesture shows that you respect her and
her time, it shows that you don't want to leave her hanging
a simple, it's been really nice chatting with you but I've got a
run will take you such a long way, especially when it comes to
text messages. You know the difference between Instant
Messenger and having a phone in our pocket, which just shows you
how old I actually am, is that we are always available like you
can always send a text, you can always be receiving a text and
therefore you need to actually be in communication about your
availability,
especially as it changes and speaking of your availability
rule number five, mind your availability as much as you want
to show her that you are reliable and available to her do
not want to take that too far. I have so many videos on YouTube
about boundaries and saying no, because this is something that
men are not taught. Unfortunately, it ends up
getting them into all kinds of situations where they experience
dissatisfaction they put the needs of women above their own,
they become doormats, they end up in the friendzone. The reason
that you need to have boundaries around your availability is
because you are a person who has real person stuff to do. Even if
you have a wide open calendar, it is still wise not to be too
available to someone in the early dating process. Unless of
course, she's doing the same for you. And so you're mirroring
each other. This is not about playing games, I do not condone
playing games, it is not a reasonable way to build a
meaningful connection. It also is true that you should not be
endlessly available to the person that you're texting,
especially if you're just getting to know them. If you see
her text and you happen to be by your phone, it is totally fine
to respond right away. But if you are constantly giving
immediate responses, it's probably going to come up as a
little desperate. And you might come off as if you don't have
better things to do with your life than sit around and wait
for her text messages, which is not sending her the signal that
you are a high performance high value man. The key to doing this
is actually just to live away from your phone. Like don't be
on your phone all of the time. Even if you need it for work,
spend time setting boundaries and saying this is my work time.
I'm only using my phone for work during this time. I'll check in
with you when I go to the bathroom. I'll check in with you
when I go to lunch. Now if you happen to be, you know cruising
down the aisle of the grocery store and you see a text message
and you're like you know I do want to interrupt my picking out
various soup cans or whatever to messager can do it. I love that
for you. You're into her she's into you use this rule
judiciously. There was a check in we would love to be checked
in on it because we love when you make us feel safe. Now this
is not a diminutive, like paternalism check in like, hey,
just want to make sure you made it home last night, but just a
simple and sexy way to let her know that you're thinking of her
a funny meme. How's your day going? So far? Hey, I'm thinking
about you are all so fire. But you know what is even better?
Number 6.5. The follow up check in if the woman that you're
texting with tells you that she has a big meeting on Monday
shares with you that she's nervous or she's excited about
something, check in with her about it bringing up something
that she's already told you and checking in on how it went is so
hot. It shows her that not only are you actually thinking of
her, but you're actually listening to what she's saying.
You remember, and you care enough to follow up. I mean, you
can talk about an investment in the love bank. This goes a long
way. So whether it's how was girls night? Or how did that big
presentation go? You are chefs kiss perfection. For the follow
up check in all right numbers. Keep it consensual before you
go. Okay, Caitlin, I watched all your other videos. I'm
subscribed to your channel I've applied for your coaching. I
know what consent is. Hold up. Let me just make my point. Okay,
we all know how important consent is in the bedroom. Well,
consent is equally important inside of your texting game. And
this is for so many reasons. I mean, at a bare minimum, you
just don't know what any woman that you're with has been
through before what triggers or what trauma she has. So getting
consent before you send something like I did pick but
even before you send something that's a little racier or a
little sexier, is actually a way to assure that she feels safe
with you. And safety is the foundation to great sex. I've
said it 1000 times hope to say it a million more safety.
Ironically, the foundation of great sex women need to feel
safe in order to have big explosive orgasms. Just
scientific fact. I don't know a single woman who would be happy
to receive an unsolicited dick pic. Not one, including me. But
beyond that, say you're having a sexy thought or you're thinking
about sending her something a little bit not safe for work
check in first and make sure that she's into it. This gives
her the opportunity to say yes, it gives you the opportunity to
know and feel confident that what you're sending is wanted. I
mean, think about how many factors go into sending a sexy
text message out of the blue, she could be at work, she could
be stressed about her child, she could be looking at her mom with
her phone out on the counter in between them. She could be
having lunch with her dad sending a spicy text message at
the
wrong time kills the mood before it's even started. It is as
simple as saying, Hey, I'm having a sexy thought. Do you
mind if I share? Hey, I have something a little Nazi for work
I want to send you Is it okay if I send it or tell me what it's
okay to send it. So there you have it my seven rules for
texting women. And of course, being a modern day I messaged
Casanova is only the tip of the iceberg when it comes to
successfully dating and being desirable to women. Knowing what
to text and how to text and when to text is a great place to
start. But an exciting and fulfilling and truly satisfying
romantic life begins with a deep sense of confidence itself. And
if you have that deep sense of confidence, then videos like
this are just icing on the cake because you already know from a
deep seated sense of your gut, how to respond to her how to
text her how to talk to her how to take care of her how to make
love to her. And so if living the best, most empowered and
authentic version of yourself is something that you want, so that
you can bring that into your whole world so that you can
bring that into your dating life so that you can bring that to
your job to your ability to make money, then please go down into
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excellent content information on how to have the best sex life.
Ever. Thank you so much for tuning in. I will see you here
next week.