I’ve been thinking about you guys. We’ve been thinking about you.
Your tribute was so beautiful last week— Well, I was thinking about you guys, and how
close you were, I mean really, really like family with Don.
Which one of you did he like better? Let’s just start with that.
John? You think John was the favorite? Well he called him, “Stamos,” so he never got
his name right. And John got close with him first. I mean
he really did love John. I think he took him back to an older time
of showbiz when people were like John: just handsome
and smart, and didn’t talk about show business - talked about family and, uh—
Oh wow! And that’s why “Full House” will never go off the air.
How did you meet Don in the first place? Well I think— I was at Tony’s Taverna,
a Greek restaurant and I sat next to him and you know it was about 15 or 17 years ago,
so it was before his renaissance, his resurgence. So interesting to be by his side to watch
him get the accolades that he deserved, you know?
I think after the documentary, you remember “Mr. Warmth” people saw like, oh he’s
still alive he’s still the funniest guy on the planet—
That is a great documentary that people should watch. It’s a great opportunity to watch
“Mr. Warmth” which really covers his career, you know the
beginning part of his career which, you know even like for me, I of course loved him on
The Tonight Show and you’d see him in all these things
but I didn’t know about all the stuff that preceded that.
I became in love with him at 17 years old. I snuck into the Latin Casino in New Jersey.
And I was underage, and so I got arrested, but I just— I loved him from The Tonight
Show and I loved him from everything he ever did:
all the roasts and everything. And his way of roasting was like nobody else’s.
It was not done mean-spirited. He did it out of love, but then when he was
mean to you it was like a privilege. It was like a gift. It really was a great—
like, not too many people you’re thrilled when they say something
mean to you. I can’t really think of anyone else—
But for every mean thing he said in his whole career, he said two nice things for that—
true. And he loved you, Jimmy. He loved you a lot.
Well— it made me jealous actually. No it did not!
You guys were, I mean listen, I know you guys talked on the phone all the time
it was really like a fatherly-type relationship. I didn’t grow up - you know, I didn’t
stay up late to watch him on Carson I mean I was certainly aware of him, but we
started out straight up kind of talking about I never said he was like a father figure - that
was for him to say. I tread lightly on those words
but we talked about that, you know he really wanted me to find a girl—
A woman! A woman. He said stop dating, you know, teenagers.
And John made him— and you know he told me the same thing!
The problem is, when he did that joke he was like, “Eh Stamos with 9-year-olds”
I’m like, “why nine?” Like make them 20 or 22. Yeah he would always go, “you’re
dating a 9-year-old” I mean, that’s not appropriate. Right? That’s
wrong people, that is wrong. But you made him so happy because you didn’t
just find a woman, you found thousands of women.
You found women all over— everywhere! In elevators—
Don would say he had a little clicker for each one. No he wouldn’t because it wouldn’t
have gotten a laugh. By the way, I won’t let you off the hook
either because he was just kind of obsessed with you guys
settling down. He would always bust your balls about that.
He was worried about Bob. And rightfully so. We’d have long conversations, “What are
we gonna do with Saget?” Why do you say he was worried about Bob?
Look at him! This is what he said about my comedy - and this is going to be foul.
Well he would say that I would come out and I’d look like a Jewish Clark Kent.
And he would tell this to Bob Newhart and Tim Conway: his contemporaries, and Bob Newhart
his best friends. And he would say, “you know what Bob Saget
does in his act?” and they would go, “what?” He goes, “oh well he comes out like a Jewish
Clark Kent, and then he sings a song: “And the monkey [BLEEP] the dog and the dog [BLEEP]
the monkey,” and I said, “Don I don’t do that!” I’ve never said that! I’ve
inferred. No he says, “And I [BLEEP] John, and I [BLEEP]
John!” Well that’s just truth, but—
How many times between the two of you did you have dinner with Don? What would you guess?
A lot. A lot. When I first started hanging around with him, you know like I said, 15-17
years ago, it was just me, Don, and Barbara.
Barbara, his wife. Beautiful wife. Who we send so much love to right now. Oh she’s
the best. And his daughter, Mindy. A lot of love to
that family. You know what I love: when you ask Barbara
or Don, you say “hey Don, how are you?” And he would always say
“We’re fine.” “Hey Barbara, how are you?” “We’re fine.” Isn’t that beautiful?
And Barbara knew every story— she couldn’t care less. She would just push her glasses
up. “Takes off her bra and her head hits the
sink!” You know, those are the— with her jewelry.
Yeah the jewelry weighs her down in the pool! Barbara would be having a conversation with
my wife or whomever she was sitting next to, and Don would
be telling a story, and he’d get stuck on some detail of the story, you wouldn’t even
think Barbara was listening but Barbara would just be like, “Sinatra!
The Sands!” - just fill in all the blanks. “And we’ll have another round!” Yeah.
He would say, “John, give me that cookie.” And she would say, “Don, you can’t have
the cookie, you have diabetes.” “John, give me the [BLEEP] cookie. Give
me the cookie.” He snuck him cookies! The man was diabetic.
Stuck them under the table to give him the cookies.
“John! Why did you give him—“ then I’d stick them the bill and go home.
I had a dinner story with them, and it was just— John couldn’t make it- I think he
was busy dating a 9-year-old. By the way, the great thing was that I finally
met a beautiful woman who I’m madly in love with, and Don got
to meet her and approved her, and was just crazy about her.
Same thing with me, and it’s the same woman, which is ironic! No but we both met women
at the same time and mine’s actually a woman - so’s yours,
I don’t mean… I mean for my age, because I’m your senior.
So let me - I’ll just tell you this briefly because I wanted to tell this story.
We’re at dinner at Craig’s, who emailed me before I got here and said please mention
me on the air. So we’re at dinner there, and it’s just
Barbara, Don, and me. Or I - I don’t know… I don’t care.
And they would bring out these little hot dogs wrapped in dough because they bring them
out. And I said, “bring him the hot dogs wrapped
in dough,” because he liked them. And she goes, “Don, where’d you get that?”
and he goes, “Where’d I get it? It’s a restaurant!” But I ordered it, right?
And so she gets up, she’s like mad, she goes to the bathroom, and to make him laugh,
that’s like a big gift. This is one that I’ll always remember: so
she gets up, goes to the bathroom, and I said “You gotta get out of this,” and the man
hit the table. And then he smacked me. Did he ever smack
you in the face? Many times. And he would do it lovingly, too.
He didn’t love comics, to be honest with you, but he loved you two. He didn’t love
comics in general? Right? And when I first started bringing Bob
around, I was like “eh… keep the comics away” or whatever.
But then he, slowly he really started to love Bob and then really— you really could make
him laugh, which was— This is really hard for me. I mean what you
did the other night is how I feel right now. ‘Cause I just— and I don’t like doing
it either, in front of people, but I just loved this guy.
Well I don’t want to upset you— no you are, you are!
I just do want to say about the two of you: John Stamos and Bob Saget, between the cookies
and the hot dogs, killed Don Rickles. Good evening, Mr. President! Nice to see you,
sir! And your lovely wife, Nancy. It’s a big treat for me to fly all the way
from California to be here for this kind of money.
That’s Don Rickles with the Reagans! So Don— if I had to guess, I would say you
guys had hundreds of dinners with Don. He would tell - he had kind of a rotation
of stories that he would go through, and if there was somebody new at the table he would
share those. What’s your favorite of all of them? Maybe
even one that— there were some that he only told to very small groups. Is there one that
comes to mind? Well there would be the Frank story, why don’t
you tell it, you know everything. He’s told that story! Everybody knows that
story. I think that’s probably the thing that people know most about him.
You know, maybe this isn’t what you’re talking about but I knew a secret
because we had the same audio-video guy, and all his passwords were “Hitler”.
Actually, when we were— a year ago— that’s excellent, that is a good piece of trivia.
That’s real easy to figure out. We were at the Saban Theater, and he performed.
And at that time he couldn’t stand and so he was in a chair, and we were all there
and he got up one time in the act - one time, and it was planned, and it was to goose step.
He stood up, and he put the mustache on - this was a man who spent all of his energy
to stand up in this chair, just to walk across the stage - just to goose step and go “jawohl”
I don’t know— Were you ever at a show where he, you know
he does his act and said, “the Asian person over there, the
African American person there, the Mexican person—“ the lights come up - there was
no Asian person. There was no— well he might have been there.
Were you there Guillermo? Yeah, I was there, yeah.
I mean, he was the best. I have to say that it’s just been the highlight of my life
to have spent time with him and— that’s the truth.
You spoke to Bob Newhart today, I know. I did, on the way here. I talked to him, and
I said “You know, you’re it now, so we’re gonna
take you to dinner! And I’m attracted to your wife Ginny.”
And said, “Oh, that’s an age difference!” So we are gonna take him to dinner.
We have to find a new person anyway. Don’s already being replaced? What?
I was emotional on the way here, I needed someone to take his place!
This is not American Idol, or The Voice, we can wait!
What’d he say the last time you talked to him? Well I— the last time I talked to him
was, I guess— It’s so hard— like five weeks ago I called
him and I said, “how are you feeling?” And he said, “What do I have to do to get
you out of my life?” That was it! So I did, apparently have something to do with it.
He did a little one on one thing - not just with people he knew, but also with everyone
he passed. I got so many messages on Twitter, and emails
of people saying like, “I was a Page standing in the hall
at NBC and he said, ‘wipe that stupid smile off your face.’” and it really was a nice
little gift something people could tell their families
a little story about Don Rickles, because really you just
want to be - it’s like the Pope, you want to be touched on the head - and in this case
you want to be insulted by Don as he walks by.
I was just thinking as we were holding hands, getting ready to come out here: he wanted
so badly to get a Kennedy Honor Center - Kennedy Center Honor.
We should work on that, I know— he had a theory that
somehow he had offended the Kennedy family in the past.
He said something to Joe Kennedy about hookers and handguns. Yes - Joe Kennedy has been dead
for what how many years? Like 70 years? But we should
try. Were you at the dinner the last time he said
“Before I die I hope I just get one of those honors.” I have discussed that with him,
he seemed certain that— but that would be a lovely thing.
I emailed someone at the Kennedy Center - it was just a random
thing, you just go online - no I emailed a person, because I had done a roast of James
Caravelle there and it would have been a lovely thing for
us— Do you have any other guests? Because Bob…
oh are you saying shut up Bob? No, no we’re going to be fine.
I never thought we’d be friends this long! My God, the first four years we worked together,
we weren’t like besties. You were bringing all the hot
women in the world to the show, you had a mullet, you were
Uncle Jesse, and I was a married guy and living in the Palisades. I didn’t know what the
hell was going on. You were getting action all the time, I was
trying to write jokes at night. You were, as Don would call you, a whiny Jew.
That’s redundant! You guys are going to be like the old guys
on The Muppets, sitting next to each other. I hope that happens! I hope so too. John Stamos
and Bob Saget, everybody! You can see Don Rickles at the Orleans Hotel
in Las Vegas, August 9th - 11th!