personal responsibility whoa who wants
to hear about that
well you do if you want to have any
chance at health wealth and happiness so
what does it mean personal
responsibility
you probably already know but just in
case it means holding yourself
accountable for your words and actions
instead of blaming others or making
constant excuses
it means taking responsibility for your
own successes but also and this is even
more important your own failures
your life boils down to this conscious
choices habits and random events
you can't control everything that
happens to you
accidents sickness bad luck human malice
and natural disasters are all
unfortunate realities of life
on the other hand you also get to
experience love friendship kindness
opportunity and generosity all the good
stuff life has to offer
but bad things do happen and sometimes
there's nothing we can do about it what
we can control is how we react it's a
lot easier said than done but people do
it all the time
who doesn't know someone who's been
dealt a bad hand for example a
debilitating disease yet who manages to
be happier than someone who is in
perfect health we all confront our own
struggles pain personal tragedies and
ultimately death so while you're here i
recommend making the most of the
opportunity
to do that the very first thing you have
to do is take responsibility for your
life yet the simple and self-evident
concept is widely rejected and even
mocked why is that
it's because it strikes at the core of
our ego our image of ourselves it's
human nature to seek excuses
telling people they're responsible for
their bad decisions removes these
comforting alibis blaming another
individual group or plain bad luck is
much more appealing
furthermore adopting such a victim
mindset can act as a form of social
currency a way to court attention and
sympathy or even as a cudgel to wield
against others
if you're out of shape broke
unsuccessful or unhappy then it must be
the fault of someone else or even better
some nefarious system which doesn't even
need to be defined
you just know that you're a victim of it
it's easy to see why people would want
to reject the idea of personal
responsibility the warm glow of
victimhood is very tempting but the
consequences of doing so inevitably lead
to misery anger and ruin
only when you recognize that your
destiny is in your own hands can you
make positive changes to your life your
health career relationships self-esteem
happiness and most important of all your
character
no one else can or will do it for you
as one recovering addict put it when
asked when did you decide to become
sober the day i stopped blaming
everybody else for my problems
to understand where you are now and to
make better decisions in the future it's
also important to understand history
wise people and being wise has little to
do with your age learn from the past
but a word of caution preoccupation with
the past to the point of obsession is
destructive
the past is immutable it can't be
altered nor reversed
you have no control over the past but
you do have control over the present and
the future if you're driving a car
whilst only looking in the rear view
mirror then you're going to crash but if
you keep your eyes on the road ahead
looking back only to orient yourself
then you are far more likely to reach
your destination intact
we all start at different positions in
life we don't get to choose when or
where or to whom we're born we don't
choose our genetics our nationality our
sex nor our ethnicity
everyone has advantages and
disadvantages that they can't take
credit for nor be blamed for the only
question that matters is what do you do
with what you have
it's trendy now for people to talk about
privilege through a narrow lens
typically focused on skin color gender
sexuality and occasionally wealth
privilege is considered a sin that must
be decried and even shamed
i take a different view i believe it's
our responsibility to take advantage of
whatever privileges we have in order to
succeed and ideally provide such
privileges for others
everything else is just excuse making
when you refuse to take responsibility
for yourself you are whether you know it
or not giving it to somebody else be it
another person or a government and that
is disempowering
personal responsibility is the ultimate
freedom and it's great to be free
i'm zubie host of the real talk with
zubi podcast and author of strong advice
zubi's guide to fitness for everybody
for prager university thank you for
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