JESSE WATTERS. 5:00 IN NEW YORK CITY, THIS IS
THE FIVE.
THE FIVE. THE TERM TRAIN KEEPS ROLLING
THROUGH WESTERN STATES THIS WEEK
ANOTHER MASSIVE RALLY JUST A FEW
MINUTES AGO IN LAS VEGAS.
TRUMP ON HIS GAME MOCKING THE
DEMOCRATS AHEAD OF THE NEVADA
CAUCUSES TOMORROW, TAKE A LOOK.
>> POCAHONTAS WAS REALLY MEAN,
BUT SHE IS GOING TO BE EASY.
I HOPE IT’S HER, SHE MADE A
LITTLE COMEBACK THE OTHER NIGHT
BECAUSE BUT IT’S NOT GOING TO BE
HURT.
HURT. IT CAN’T BE PETE BUTTIGIEG,
ALFRED E. NEUMAN.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
INTRODUCING PRESIDENT ALFRED E.
NEUMAN.
NEUMAN. BERNIE IS TOO EMOTIONAL, BIDEN
IS ANGRY.
IS ANGRY. BIDEN IS ANGRY, EVERYTHING IS
ANGER.
ANGER. THAT IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU
CAN’T GET THE WORDS OUT, NO IT
DOES.
DOES. >> Jesse: TRUMP SAVING HIS
BEST FOR MANY MICHAEL BLOOMBERG.
>> MIKE, HOW DID HE DO IN THE
DEBATE THE OTHER DAY?
HE HAS SPENT ALMOST $500 MILLION
IN ORDER TO GET EMBARRASSED BY
POCAHONTAS, SHE IS BEEN RIGHT?
SHE WANTED TO GET HIM, SHE SET I
GOT HIM, SHE WANTS TO SEE THOSE
AGREEMENTS.
AGREEMENTS. THIS POOR GUY PROBABLY SIGNED
100 OF THEM, AND EACH ONE IS A
DISASTER.
DISASTER. NOBODY TOLD ME THIS WAS GOING TO
HAPPEN.
HAPPEN. NOBODY TOLD ME.
>> Jesse: REG AND I WERE
TRYING TO GET SOME WORK DONE
THIS AFTERNOON, WE HEARD THE
SPEECH OUTSIDE AND WE GATHER
AROUND TO START WATCHING IT, HE
IS ON HIS GAME.
IT’S PRETTY PRAGMATIC.
THE MOST INTERESTING THING ABOUT
THE THING TODAY IS THAT HE
DECIDED TO BREAK THROUGH THE
FOURTH WALL AND HE TOLD
EVERYBODY IT WAS A SHOW, HE WAS
TALKING ABOUT BEING WITH MARK
BURNETT AND THIS CAST OF
CHARACTERS, THIS IS BETTER THAN
THE APPRENTICE.
THE APPRENTICE. THIS WAS THE FIRST TIME, I
THINK, THAT HE REFERRED TO HIS
PRESIDENCY AS A SHOW.
FOR PEOPLE WHO ARE USED TO BEING
CRITICAL OF TRUMP WHO ARE NO
LONGER CRITICAL, THE PEOPLE THAT
CAN DISCERN THE DIFFERENCE
BETWEEN A JOB AND THE SHOW.
THE THING THAT HE IS DOING, THE
SEPARATE TO SEPARATE THE
CRAZINESS OF THIS GIVES YOU A
HEALTHY EASE OF MIND THAT NEVER
TRUMP’S CAN’T DO.
IT MAKES YOU THINK, WHAT DOES
THE SECOND TERM LOOK LIKE?
WILL IT BE MORE THEATRICAL, MORE
SITE LOCATIONS, MORE GUEST STARS
AND ROAD TRIPS?
BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT HAPPENS
WHEN A TV SERIES GETS RENEWED,
IT IS NOT A REELECTION, IT IS A
RENEWAL OF A TV SHOW AND THERE
WILL BE MORE STUFF AFTER THE
DEBATE.
DEBATE. YOU SAW THE DEMOCRATS
REALIZATION THAT THIS WASN’T
LOCKED, IMPULSIVENESS, OR
RUSSIAN BOTS THAT ELECTED HIM,
THIS IS A UNIQUE SKILL SET
THAT ONLY HE POSSESSES AND THEY
CAN’T BE.
CAN’T BE. IT’S AN INTERESTING
TRANSFORMATION YOU SEEM IN THE
LAST COUPLE WEEKS.
>> Jesse: THE FACT THAT YOU
AND I CAN TELL THE DIFFERENCE
BETWEEN THE TRUTH AND THE
ENTERTAINMENT SIDE IS EASY,
BECAUSE WE WATCHED US FOR A
LIVING AND WE DON’T TAKE THIS
PART THAT SERIOUSLY, IT’S JUST
ENJOYABLE.
ENJOYABLE. BUT THE MEDIA, THEY FACT-CHECK
HIS JOKES, THEY DON’T GET THIS
IS PARTIALLY ENTERTAINMENT.
>> Dagen: BECAUSE THEY HAVE
ZERO SENSE OF HUMOR, THEY CAN’T
DETECT.
DETECT. HIS JOKES LAND AND ARE FUNNY
BECAUSE THEY ARE TRUE, HE HAS
THAT ABILITY TO PICK OFF ALL HIS
CANDIDATES.
CANDIDATES. I USE THIS TEST GROWING UP SOUTH
OF ALL THE DEBATES CANDIDATES,
WHICH ONE WHAT I HAD FROM AT THE
FOOD LION?
FOOD LION? WHICH ONE WOULD STAND IN FRONT
OF THE FROZEN FOOD CASE AND GET
FROSTBITE ON MY NOSE SO I DIDN’T
HAVE TO TALK TO ONE OF THEM?
LET ME KNOW WHEN THEY ARE IN THE
PARKING LOT ALREADY, BECAUSE
BERNIE IS GOING TO BE UPSET
ABOUT FOOD INFLATION, HIS
BANANAS COST MORE MONEY.
ELIZABETH WARREN IS GOING TO
LECTURE ME ABOUT BITING MY
FINGERNAILS.
FINGERNAILS. MAYBE PETE BUTTIGIEG I WOULD
TALK TO, BUT HE DOESN’T HAVE
ENOUGH EXPERIENCE TO RUN THE
FOOD LION.
FOOD LION. >> Jesse: GREG TALKED ABOUT
THE CASTING OF THIS, THE
PRESIDENT MENTIONED THAT.
THE PRESIDENT IS NOT RESPONSIBLE
FOR CASTING THE DEMOCRATIC
FIELD, HE IS JUST LUCKY THAT
THESE PEOPLE ARE RUNNING AGAINST
HIM.
HIM. IT WOULDN’T MATTER WHO IT WAS.
>> Geraldo: HE FINDS THE WEAK
SPOT WHEREVER HE IS, HE IS ALSO
SUCH AN OVERSIZED PERSONALITY
THAT HE BLOCKS OUT THE SUN.
EVERYBODY ELSE SEEMS LIKE OR
ANOTHER, HE HAS A FLAMETHROWER.
YOU GIVE HIM ONE SHOT, HE WILL
SCORCH YOU.
SCORCH YOU. HE ALSO HAS THE CHARISMA THEY
ARE, IT’S UNMISTAKABLE.
IT IS THE CHARISMA OF THE BULL,
USE THE EXPRESSION GODZILLA, HE
IS A SCARY ADVERSARY BUT HE IS
ALSO SUCH A MAGNETIC PERSONALITY
PERSONALITY.
PERSONALITY. HE IS RIGHT WHEN HE SAYS THAT
CNN WOULD BE OUT OF BUSINESS IF
NOT FOR HIM, THE
"THE WASHINGTON POST" WILL BE
OUT OF BUSINESS.
>> COME EVENTUALLY
"THE WASHINGTON POST" AND
"NEW YORK TIMES" WILL BE DEAD AS
A DOORNAIL AFTER LEAVE, AND CNN
WILL BE AN OBSOLETE BUSINESS.
MSNBC WILL BE OUT OF BUSINESS,
THE TITANIC EQUIVALENT WENT ON
THEY WOULDN’T COVER IT UNLESS I
WAS ON IT.
>> Jesse: THAT IS TRUE, IT IS
EVERYTHING TRUMP RIGHT NOW.
>> Dagen: THE ENTIRE THING IS
CARICATURES ABOUT PEOPLE, IT IS
ALL ELEMENTS OF TRUTH.
IT’S A PICTURE YOU GET AT
DISNEYLAND, A KIND OF LOOKS LIKE
YOU JUST THINGS ARE EXAGGERATED.
IT IS ABSOLUTELY TRUE.
WHAT IS GREAT ABOUT THIS, THIS
IS THE SAME GUY THAT EVERYBODY
GOT TO MEET IN 2015.
HE HASN’T CHANGED, THEY HAVEN’T
RUINED HIM, HE DIDN’T GET
SCARED, THAT IS THE OTHER THING
THAT I LOVE ABOUT HIM.
WHILE IT IS PERHAPS PERFORMANCE,
IT IS REALLY HIM AS WELL.
JUST LIKE HIM GOVERNING HIS
PERFORMANCE IN A SENSE BUT THAT
IS HIM TOO.
AMERICANS CAN RELATE TO HIM,
THAT IS WHAT EVERYONE IS
THINKING BUT IT IS ALSO BECAUSE
IT IS CONSISTENT.
SOMETIMES HE MIGHT IRRITATE YOU
OR MIGHT NOT AGREE, BUT THERE HE
IS, HE IS THE SAME GUY.
YOU DO KNOW THAT IT IS A JOKE,
THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO DON’T ARE
THE DEMOCRATS AND THEY BECOME IN
AN EFFORT TO BE LIKE TRUMP
REVEALING THEIR ULTIMATE
WEAKNESS WHICH IS THEIR LACK OF
CONFIDENCE IN THEMSELVES.
THEY WANT TO BE LIKE SOMEONE
ELSE, THAT HAS BEEN THE ULTIMATE
FRAUD.
FRAUD. WHAT THE DEMOCRATS AND THE
ESTABLISHMENT HAS ALWAYS DONE IS
PRESENT THESE KINDS OF FIGURES
TO YOU OF WHO THEY ARE, WHETHER
IT IS THE OBAMA’S OR THE BUSH
FAMILY OR THE CLINTONS, THIS IS
BRAND-NEW AND IT IS REAL, AND
THAT IS WHAT THEY CAN’T STAND
AND THEY CAN’T REPLACE.
>> Jesse: WHEN HE GETS ON
ERROR THE DAY AFTER THEY HAVE
THESE DEBATES, AND HE JUST
REPACKAGES THE DEMOCRATS BRAND
FOR THEM IT IS ALWAYS RIGHT