(Whapoosh) Top of the morning to ya laddies
my name is jacksepticeye
and welcome back to "Clustertruck"!
My favorite song on the entire soundtrack is playing in the main menu right now
*intense dance moves*
It's so good!
Um, they fixed th-the custom maps
I was DM'ing them on Twitter
And they were talking about how there was a fix going on
Because apparently, the game didn't accept a certain thing that people were putting in the title
Or something like that
I don't know, but it's fixed now so all these levels are starting to show up again
So let's get into so-
Uh, there's one called "Jacksepticeye" right here, Imma play it
I downloaded--I subscribed to these on like, the steam workshop
So I forgot which ones I actually had
Cuz these are what I was supposed to play in the last episode
AH! There's a big septic eye at the end!
Ah awesome! :D
I have no idea what power-ups I have
Okay, slow motion...
Do I have double jump?
I don't know!!
I'm just gonna
I just gonna hope for the best!
STOP FIRING TRUCKS!!
Goo--ooh! I made it!
Over Sam!
*a look of utter betrayal*
SAM!
You killed me!
Oh God I have the fucking flippy trucks
Ooooooh shite balls
hhHHAA
*girlish scream*
Make it!! Yeeeaaaaaah!
DUDE you're the best!
Oh fuck...
Ohhh fuck!!
OH FUCK!
I can't touch ANYthing now!
WOAH!
I made a truck flip and then I flipped on it again!
OH! And then it fucked me in the ass!
*squeaky voice* I'm still alive!
*very squeaky scream*
Oh, why!?!
*laughter*
Gooooo!! (?)
I don't know what I'm doing!
Oh, I'm staying on you!
I'm staying on you cuz you have ~secrets~
Boom! Boom!
*imitating truck launcher*
*singing* Boom, boom, boom, boom....
I want you in my room...
We spend a night together...
*Another face of betrayal*
I need a fucking different...
I need a different ability!
Let's go grapple hook!
Double jump is the easy solution...
Cuz that's the one I'm most used to
I'm like "oh, double jump, you will save me!"
But--
THIS! Is more fun cuz then
AWOOSH!
*defeated laughter*
Sometimes it's a bit of a, a lame wad
*sound of defeat*
Cuz sometimes it pulls you too far
You know what I mean? (Yes, we do)
You feel me, dooooog?
GET OFF DOG, STOP FEELING ME!
Soundtrack's fuckin' awesome to this game!
COME ON!!!
*screech of determination*
The rage of a thousands suns has been felt inside my belly hole today!
*gently* There we go...
Oh nice...
WHERE'D YOU COME FROM YA BASTARD?!!
No, nope, nope
*attempt at a juming sound*
STICK TO IT!!!
WHY??!?
I'm finishing the level,
There should be a hard cut-off
There shouldn't be a window that you have to go through to finish the level,
It should be just *demostrates* a flat plane
That once you go over the goal,
you fuckin' win!
Staph!
Staaaph!
Stop doing-- well, go, now! But stop doing bad things to me!
*face of disappointment
Sam...
Sam!
SAM S SEPTICEYE!
I swear to fuck if you don't listen to what I'm going to say right now,
I will kill you!
(I won't, really)
*kiss* I love you...
I love that Sam, I'm gonna put him right there
I haven't played with my lil' Sam plushies
In a such a, in a, in a such a long time!
I need to jump over and then grapple to this
I need to grapple to the goal
To the goal...
To the goal...!
To the...
YES!!!
OH, THANK GOD IT'S DONE!
Should've been done four weeks ago...
But you know what?
We'll just leave it at that,
Sam, sam *kiss* love you, we're puttin' ya back now
RIGHT!
I've some more jacksepticeye levels to do
but I feel like I'm gonna do somethin'...
American Ninja!
Yes!
Because we did Wipeout
Oh, weird! WEEEIRD!
WEEEIRD!!
There's no trucks!!
Or anything!
It's just all this!
Get up!! x7
There we go--ah I didn't fuckin' mean to do that...
Oh, this is, this is so bizzare!
Okay, cuz we did Wipeout last time
So now we're doing American Ninja Warrior!
*jumping sound*
Well, using a grapple hook kind of,
breaks it, doesn't it?
Kind of make me a little cheat-y?
No, fuckin' still failed!!
Imma fucking do this, Imma do this
I don't care that I'm doing it the cheatsy way!
I just wanna fuckin', I just want to finish some levels, man,
I just want to feel good about myself!
And some of these other levels,
Aren't letting me feel like that,
Because they suck a dick!
Oh God, I have to jump across?
Oh, Jesus
Just run!
Just run! Oh, sexy parkour!
Can I really go down this?
OH!
WHEEW!
GO!
Go dude!!
YES!
Keep climbin'!
Keep climbin'!!
I'm not climbing any, anymore! How do I, how the fuck...
How the fuck do I do this?!?!
*a musical selection*
Come, oh,
I feel like that thing is happening where I'm just stuck to it!
WHAT THE FUCK, MAN?
Maybe I have to jump side to side...?
No, that's so fucking disorienting...
Oh, God, I did a flip, that's even more disorienting
OH I'M SO CLOSE!!
Oh I'm so close! Okay, I got an idea...
HA!
The fuckin' idea didn't work...
I'm not an "ideas" man!
WOOSHK!
WHY!??!
*frustrated yelling*
Like I can get so close but not to the top
Maybe my friend "double jump" would help!
*frightened face* Where am I?
Why am I?!
Okay, I went around!
That was cool!
*laughter*
Let's not do that again!!
*more laughter*
OKAY
Let's see if I can...
YES!
Now just climb!
JUST CLIMB IT!
CLIMB IT ("CLIMATE") LIKE GLOBAL WARMING!
Oh, why?!?
Why, I'm just stuck in perpetual fucking loops here!
Okay...
Eugh!
Fuck, now I'm under it!
*loud, prolonged, high pitched shriek*
OH I SURVIVED!!
*heavy breathing*
Oh, that's a tough one! x2
I'm at the fucking goal, just let me do it!
I'm LITERALLY
at the end of the fucking level
I can see the goal right in front of me!
Just let me win!
COME ON, it's right there!
Climb!
Climb you hairy bastard!
Get up!
Come on!
How do I finish this?!?
I feel like I've fucking broken it...
OHH
Oh... oh!
YES!!!
Oh, I thought I failed there for a second!
I did it!
I did it, let it be known that Jack did it!
Oh-hoh-oh
I'm fifth!
There's probably only like five people who tried the level BUT
I'M FIFTH!
That's good for me!
"Triple Threat"...
Ah, Jesus...
OKAY
I AM ON THE TRUCKS!
I CAN!
DO
THIS!
I thought you were all gonna hang around for the fucking birthday surprise!
But now ya decided to--
FUUUCK
ooOOOH MAMA! x2
OKAY
Whatever you wanna do!
That's cool with me!
If you wanna fuck up at life...
Then that's fine...
THAT'S FINE!
I have no where left to turn...
I have nobody to turn to in life...
The trucks are all comin' at me!
WHAAT?
I don't even have any trucks going in that direction anymore!
Oh...? OH
OH THE LITTLE TRUCK THAT COULD!
Oh, my little buddy!
Oh, I love you!
*smooches*
You're the best of us!
Shite...
Shite....
Shiiiit...
*frightened screech*
OOOOH YEEA!! *laughter*
Awesome!
Oh, thank God, 406th
That's...not a good score, that's not what you wanna see...
"Lawn Mower Blades," baby!!
I did this already...
But now it's all neon!
Actually, I think it was neon last time too...
Right down the middle baby!
Fuck it
"Choose a Goal," I didn't do this
Why do you always start me off of the fucking trucks?
Wait, what?
That's not the win?!!
OH
You cheeky bastard!
So I have to choose
AH
Choose where to go?!
Where I want to go to win?
That's not it, either!
Please don't tell me it fucking randomly changes each time,
Cuz that would be el sucko!
Oh my God there's a /billion/ of them!
Oh my God there's so many goals!
I AM NOT TRYING ALL OF THESE!!!
I'm just going to the end and hoping that that one is the fucking real one
Just like every other level
C'mon!
Heavy metal fingers!
HUAH!
WHAT IS THE REAL GOAL??
Maybe that's the question !
Maybe it's asking me what's the real goal in life
I don't have the answer to that
It's this one!
It''s this one, for sure this one!
Oh, I was for sureness!
I don't even know which one that was one to fucking skip it this time
AH, shite
FUCK ME!
I am more of a man for some fucking "Tunnel Madness," dude
Oh, God,
*vomiting sounds*
It's running poorly...
And it makes it feel like I'm on drugs...
These are the bad drugs!
The ones that make you hallucinate, and fucking, kill a badger!
OKAY
Just, keep looking forward!
Keep looking forward and you can make this!
You are a STRONG
INDEPENDENT WOMAN
Who don't need NO MAN!
HUAH!
YES!
Guh---fuck it!!
Oh God,
Are you still going?
Yes, you are!
What the fuck...there's trucks everywhere!
OKAY
You seem to have settled down a small bit now, that's good!
That's good, you found yourself a person to marry
That's fucking marvelous
Settle down, have some kids, buy a house
That's great for you!
I see the goal...
I see the goal and I want it soo bad!!
I want it so bad in my life!!!
*a look of tragedy*
MR. FOAM PADDING!?
WHAT HAPPENED?
I can't believe you've done this...
Maybe I should just be patient...?
Like a dude in a hospital, you know what I mean?
Just sit around
and just hang out
Maybe that's what this level is trying to tell me!
That not
Life is not a fucking, a race to the finish
It's just about enjoying the journey
and having fun
That's not at all what this is telling me BUT
I wanna feel good about myself doing this level!
I don't want to fucking, fail again!
C'mon goal is right there!
Here we go!
*absolute joy*
I did it
So calm... (?)
"Tunnel Madness Complete"
Thank you, let me NEVER LOOK AT THAT LEVEL AGAIN
Give me a fucking headache...
"Tunnel of Septic"
You mean like a butthole?
OKAY...
Ah, it runs so nicely now!
OH, it's so smoothers!
*frightened noises* I'm afraid!
That was cool though!
I didn't get a chance to look at it properly ...
What the fuck is goin' on here....
Am I gonna get hit by that?!
Did you see that?!
That thing was spazzing out all over the place!
OKAY
There's another jacksepticeye level called "Boopy Doopy"
WHAT?!
Where am I?
In space and time?!
Ah, man, the fucking goal is up?!
HEU!
Well, how am I supposed to do that now?
The trucks have all stopped!
They're all dead, they're all lying down cuz they had a big long--
They're like dogs, they're lying down like
*imitates dog*
We had a long run today
Can I...hook onto this...?
HUAH!
I can't...
I'm gonna have to fucking try again
Oh, stick to something!
How bout you stick to the inside--
*surprised look*
What...?
Apparently I did it?
AND EVEN THOUGH I DID IT WITH FUCKING
ONE SECOND
PEOPLE STILL DID IT BETTER THAN ME!
I give up!
I give up on this game!
I can't get the highest score ever on any of them!
SUCKS
ANYWAY
I'm gonna leave this episode here
Thank you to anyone who has made a level for me
Or in commemoration of me, or
Whatever
Commemoration sounds like I'm *ANTI GLITCH* dead
Thank you to anyone who has made a level around me
or for me
That's very incredibly flattering of you and I appreciate it a lot
Thank you so much for that
It's cool to see
That even though I love these games anyways
That people, and then there's a custom element to it,
People go out of their way to make stuff for me
So it's incredibly heartwarming and I really appreciate it
So thank you but for now
Thank you guys so much for watching the episode
if you liked it
PUNCH that like button in the face
LIKE A BOSS
AND
High fives all round
Thank you guys and I will see all you dudes
IN THE NEXT VIDEO!!!
~I wish I had some ice-cream in my mouth right now WOAH~