[RALPH]: Hey kid!
[RALPH]: Wake up!
[VANELLOPE]: Ralph! What is wrong with you?
[RALPH]: Start churning butter and put on your church shoes, little sister, 'cause we're about to blast off!
[VANELLOPE]: Ralph, what is it you're trying to say?
[RALPH]: We're going in the internet.
[VANELLOPE]: What?!
(VANELLOPE YELLS)
(RALPH YELLS)
(RALPH GRUNTS)
[VANELLOPE]: Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the internet!
(RALPH SCREAMS)
[RALPH]: Woah! Coool.
[RAPLH]: Wow, look at all this stuff.
[VANELLOPE]: This is the most beautiful miracle I've ever seen.
[MALE]: Welcome to the search bar. What can I help you find today?
[RALPH]: Um..
[MALE]: Umbrella? Umbrage? Umami?
[RALPH]: No-
[MALE]: Noah's Ark? No doubt? No, it's from-
(RALPH GROWLS)
[MALE]: Ergonomics? Urban Outfitters. Auricle?
[VANELLOPE]: I'm pretty sure he's just trying to guess what you're gonna say
[MALE]: My auto-fill is a touch aggressive today...
[VANELLOPE]: Lemme try; take me to a website that's super intense and really nuts!
[MALE]: Oh. I only found one result.
[VANELLOPE]: Aww, come on.
[VANELLOPE]: Princesses and cartoon characters. Barf!
[EEYORE]: Hey...
[VANELLOPE]: Woah!
[VANELLOPE]: Cool!
[STORMTROOPERS]: You're coming with us, kid.
(PRINCESSES GASP)
[VANELLOPE]: Hi.
[VANELLOPE]: Woah, woah! Ladies! I'm a princess too!
[POCAHONTAS]: What kind of a princess are you?
[VANELLOPE]: Uh...
[RAPUNZEL]: Do you have magic hair?
[VANELLOPE]: No...
[ELSA]: Magic hands?
[VANELLOPE]: No...
[CINDERELLA]: Do animals talk to you?
[VANELLOPE]: No.
[SNOW WHITE]: Were you poisoned?
[VANELLOPE]: No.
[TIANA+AURORA]: Cursed?
[VANELLOPE]: No!
[RAPUNZEL+BELLE]: Kidnapped or enslaved?
[VANELLOPE]: No! Are you guys okay? Should I call the police?
[RAPUNZEL]: Do people assume all your problems got solved because a big, strong man showed up?
[VANELLOPE]: Yes!
[VANELLOPE]: What is up with that!?
[ALL PRINCESSES]: She is a Princess!
(SNOW WHITE SINGS)
[MALE VOICEOVER]: Ralph Breaks the Internet
[RALPH]: Shouldn't it be 'Ralph Wrecks the Internet'?
[VANELLOPE]: Yeah, since he is Wreck-it-Ralph.
[FEMALE]: Uh, yeah, but 'break the internet', It's like a thing.
[RALPH]: Right... It's just 'Wreck the Internet' kind of sounds better, doesn't it?
[FEMALE]: You're not wrong.
[MALE]: All right, let's get you plugged in.
[RALPH]: Whiffy! Or... is it wifey?
[VANELLOPE]: Why don't we just go in...?
[MALE]: And we are online...
[RALPH]: Woah... Cool!
[VANELLOPE]: Ralph, isn't this great?!
[VANELLOPE]: We are going to the internet!
[RALPH]: Super excited!
[RALPH]: Just one minor thing, what is the internet?
[RALPH]: Holy cow! Look at all this stuff!
[FEMALE]: Congratulations, you're a winner!
[RALPH]: Really?
[MALE]: These 10 child stars went to prison, number 6 will amaze you!
[RALPH]: That sounds interesting.
[VANELLOPE]: Ralph, come on!
[FEMALE]: Redirecting to ebay...
[MALE]: Ladies and gentlemen, the next item up, a black, velvet painting of a sorrowful kitten
[RALPH]: It's like it's looking into my soul...
[VANELLOPE]: Yeah, that one's really gonna haunt me for a while...
[RALPH]: Woah! Games!
[CHILD]: Pancake
[CHILD]: Milkshake
[RALPH]: Out of my way kid!
[RALPH]: Pancake, milkshake, milkshake...
[RALPH]: Huh. I'm starting to understand why people like this game, really zen!
[RALPH]: Milkshake!
[VANELLOPE]: Hey! Look what I found!
[VANELLOPE]: More pancakes!
[RALPH]: Let's speed it up!
Pancake, pancake, pancake, pancake, pancake, pancake, pancake, pancake-
Eat little buddy, eat eat eat!
[VANELLOPE]: Uh... Ralph, you might wanna try feeding the kitty for a little while...
[RALPH]: No! The kitty gets the milkshake!
[RALPH]: The bunny gets the pancake!
(POP)
(GIRL SCREAMS)