It's strange that human beings have gone to the trouble of inventing strange, mythical
beasts like the Minotaur, the Chimera and Sarah Jessica Parker, when in truth there
were already some really weird creatures beneath our feet the whole time, in the form of fossils
and skeletons.
Earth's natural history is an incredible story, with a cast of creatures so diverse it makes
the Oscars shortlist look about as varied as a hillbilly gene pool.
But every so often there would come along a beast or bug that looked so peculiar it
couldn't help but stand out from everything else on Earth, so let's take a look at some
such oddities in our list of seven astonishing creatures that once roamed the Earth.
Number 7: Phorusrhacids When a creature's nickname is the Terror Bird you know you're
dealing withsomething nasty; and the Cenozoic Era Phorusrhacidae were precisely that and
then some.
These gigantic flightless birds existed between 62 and 1.8 million years ago, standing at
an imposing three meters tall and capable of running at 50 kilometres per hour.
Their razor-sharp beak and vicious talons were used to peck, kick and slash their prey
to death, not that they had to dismember their dinner, as so large were these birds that
the BBC once described them as being able to swallow a medium-sized dog in one gulp
- and that is a unit of measurement I'll be using in everyday life from now on.
I think us humans are pretty fortunate to have not existed around the same time as these
bizarro versions of Big Bird, but actually this statement itself is still up for debate.
It was once thought that humans never lived during the era of the Terror Bird, but several
discoveries from Uruguay have now cast doubt on this, with some Phorusrhacidae remains
apparently dating back as soon as 17,000 years ago.
That is barely a jot on the grand scale of Earth's timeline, so is there a possibility
that these beasts still exist somewhere on Earth today?
And if so....can I get a side order of their wings?
Number 6: Helicoprion This ancient shark-like fish burst into existence 290 million years
ago, and I think it's a pretty miraculous animal for two main reasons; first, it managed
to survive the Permian-Triassic extinction which killed off 96% of all marine life, and
second...well it's that bad-ass under-bite isn't it.
In Ancient Greek Helicoprion's means "spiral saw", and when you see an artist's depiction
it's hard to argue with that name.
We only know of Helicoprion's bizarre dental arrangement and indeed its existence thanks
to fossils of its teeth, since their cartilage-based skeletons have long since decayed; but even
after multiple fossil findings we still have no idea how these incredible tooth-whorls
would have worked.
Some scientists think that the Helicoprion might have used its jaw as some kind of whip,
but I like to imagine it was just coiled out and filled with tacos.
And that is why I am not a marine biologist, or skinny, or allowed in Taco Bell anymore.
Number 5: HallucigeniaIt's certainly not hard to imagine how this fella got its name, because
it looks like someone tripped balls and drew a detailed depiction of Godzilla's junk.
Hallucigenia was a type of marine animal that spontaneously appeared during the mysterious
Cambrian Explosion 542 million years ago.
It was during this period that complex life-forms were produced for the very first time, and
it turns out that one of Mother Nature's most pressing engagements was to create this freaky
creature.
So what on literal Earth was it?
Well, Halluciegenia were a simple worm that was no more than 3.5 centimetres long, and
we think they are the ancestors of the modern velvet worm.
Each one of its fourteen to sixteen legs had a pair of claws at the end, with every claw
having its own backup claw ready and waiting inside the limb in case of injury.
There's also a set of tentacles thrown onto the front of this creature just for good measure...at
least we think it's the front, it could also be a tentacle filled butt, because we've still
not determined which way round the Hallucigenia actually goes.
Number 4: Opabinia The Opabinia single-handedly proves that Mother Nature has been messing
with us since long before she got drunk and made the Mongoose.
These creatures, which lived on the sea-floor around 500 million years ago, were considered
a joke when they were first presented to scientists in 1972.
And, with its five stalk-like eyes, fanned tail and large claw-trunk complimented by
a set of thirty lobes and thirty flippers, it's easy to see why.
The Opabinia was only about 4 to 7 centimetres long, and since it didn't have legs we think
it moved around by creating tiny Mexican Waves through flapping its many lobes as fast as
it could.
It may not surprise you to know that we still haven't precisely categorised this strange,
ancient creature, but as we begin to explore its origins in greater detail, the Opabinia
may help us to further understand the very nature of the Cambrian Explosion itself.
Number 3: Longisquama It is now widely believed that dinosaurs were once covered in a layer
of delightful feathers, but they weren't the first reptiles to achieve this, with one of
the earliest being the flamboyant Longisquama.
These guys lived 230 to 240 million years ago, which was 70 to 80 million years before
the first dinosaurs started sprouting feathers, and its translated name of "long scales" refers
to the fact they had large protrusions shaped like hockey sticks poking out of their backs.
There's still some confusion over whether these structures were indeed feathers, or
they comprised something sturdier such as a set of scales or fins; but either way this
guy looks impressive.
I mean, how could you not look awesome with a full-body Mohawk?
Number 2: Quetzalcoatlus I don't know how big you imagined ancient flying dinosaurs
like the Pterodactyl would be, but I had no idea they could give giraffes a run for their
money in the long neck stakes.
The Quetzalcoatlus was certainly the largest Pterosaur ever to take flight, and quite possibly
the largest animal ever to hit the skies too, with these airborne abnormalities rocking
a wing-span of over eleven metres wide at our most conservative estimates.
These giant dino-birds lived in North America around 99 to 55 million years ago, taking
their name from an old Aztec serpent god called Quetzalcoatl.
And despite their massive wing-span, and that long-ass neck boosting their height to a freaky
three metres tall, we think these flying giraffes weighed only 70 kilos.
This gargantuan yet lightweight frame is so unique it was once used as inspiration for
DARPA, as they sought to mimic the Quetzalcoatlus' aerodynamic nature when designing an experimental
ornithopter drone back in 1985.
And if there are any fellow picnic aficionados out there you should be extremely glad that
the Quetzalcoatlus isn't around today, because the two leading hypotheses regarding their
lifestyle choices claim that they either roamed over land picking off small vertebrates for
lunch, or that they ventured out to sea and the coastline looking for food there.
Basically, Quetzalcoatlus were the seagulls of their time, and if one of these things
was hurtling towards you on the beach the last thing you'd be worried about is your
sandwiches.
Number 1: Aegirocassis benmoulae I'm not entirely sure how a lobster and a whale would be able
to get their freak on, but if they could, the result would surely be this demented monstrosity.
Aegirocassis benmoulae lived 480 million years ago during the early Ordovician period, and
thanks to a miraculously preserved three-dimensional fossil found in Morocco, we know that this
creature had a very distinct feature which it used to collect food; namely, a giant sieve,
attached to its face.
When it was time to feed, Aegirocassis benmoulae would swim around and use its jaw-mounted
net to scoop up as much plankton as it could, filtering out the sea water and leaving behind
a pouch full of delicious sea organisms for dinner.
And while its two-metre size may not seem that impressive today, at the time of its
existence it was almost certainly the largest animal on the planet.
And that's our list.
I wonder what other astonishing creatures once roamed the Earth?
Ones whose remains have now been lost to decay for all time?
And also, could any of these bizarre beasts still exist today?
Well guess what, some of them might, because in our recent upload on the seven strangest
things found in the ocean, we covered the Coelacanth fish which was thought to have
died out 65 million years ago.
Why not check that video out right now, and see what else we've found lurking in the ocean
deep.