We hang out.
Yes.
Against your wishes, but we do hang out.
We have boozy three hour dinners.
We do.
And you've been, you're always working
on the next thing.
I know you've been, you worked on your Biden
in case he became president.
He did. And you have a very good,
you have some good observations as an impressionist.
Tell us about Biden.
Biden.
Yeah, Biden.
Well, I watched him during,
when he's doing the town hall and
that's where I kind of got him.
Cause he would walk around
with the microphone really slow.
Yeah.
My father, you know, lost his job.
No kidding, not joking around.
There's nothing funny at all about
his dad losing his job.
But does he?
My dog died.
I'm not kidding around.
(Conan laughing)
No, grandpa. I found a severed head.
No joke, no kidding around.
So that was the first hook.
No joke. I'm not kidding around here, man.
And then I noticed he made lists.
Number one, the one part,
number two, the thing,
number three, you know the drill.
Cause he gets confused and then he kind of
turns on the audience.
Come on.
It isn't rocket science folks.
I mean, I beat up a guy. You know, named Corn Pop.
Yeah, I beat him up.
Corn Pop. A pop pop popcorn, Jiffy Pop.
Anyway, excuse me.
Children of the corn.
So those were the three hooks.
Did you see, he, Biden just met,
did you, Biden just met with Putin?
Oh yeah.
That you know, to me, Putin is like,
is an interesting idea of a dictator
who's gonna be there for 30 years,
talking to a guy who might be gone in two years.
[Conan] Yeah.
So he's like, it's just, he's like
the guy has swallowed the cat, right?
No, it's our electoral system, people.
Calm down.
Yeah.
And Putin is just so smooth with it now.
You just had Trump a minute ago
(Dana doing stuttering sounds)
Now he's got,
(Dana makes confused mumbling sounds)
So he's like, (speaks in 'Russian')
And the interpreter's like,
we're gonna keep our ballistic missiles in the Ukraine.
And Biden's like, come on, come on,
get your facts straight, Jack.
Let's do some pushups.
Come on. I'll take you out behind the woodshed
and beat the hell out of you.
I was talking to you,
it was the day, I think it was the day after
the Obamas signed a Netflix deal.
Mm hmm.
Yeah. And I just happened to,
I think we got lunch or something and you were
just tickled to death that the Obamas
were gonna be working with Netflix.
And you started making me laugh so hard talking about it.
Do you remember how it went?
We were pitching movies and stuff.
I do Obama a lot in my pockets.
I just have, I've just love his
I love, I love the character of a guy,
kind of, is that cool, that calm.
You just kind of sum things up.
That's all.
And even so I had the idea.
I'd go to Netflix just to meet with them.
I would love to pitch him,
but I assumed he might have an idea for me,
cause he's new.
Then I got an idea.
Before you start.
I know it's a half hour show I think.
It's um, it's about guys in a bar
and they're all friends.
It's called Here's To You.
I go, I think that's Cheers.
Oh, fuck me, Michelle!
(Conan laughing)
(bleeped)
And always have him yelling at Michelle.
Michelle, he didn't like it.
Didn't want it.
I've got another one.
Okay, that one didn't work.
This one is a big boat sinks.
I'm calling it Gigantic.
I think that's Titanic.
Oh, fuck me, Michelle!
Michelle he didn't like it.
Michelle!
Leave the egg salad out on the table.
I'll eat it when I get to it.
So I just do him a lot.
I love, I love the cadence.
He's got that great, great cadence.
Kind of everything, you know?
He'd say, things are going good.
You gotta be happy.
That's right.
Conan O'Brien, there you go.
Andy Richter, enough said.
That's it. That's all you got to be.
You don't have to try to be anything
other than what you are.
America appreciates and loves the two of you.
(audience applauds)
I feel better.
Yeah.
Thank you Mr. President.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's the thing is
there are different kinds of impressionists
and some go for incredible accuracy.
And you do this thing where you,
you're kind of interested in accuracy and rhythm,
but you're more interested in stretching it out.
Yeah.
Which is the kind of impressions I've always
loved to see people do.
You almost stretch it out like silly putty
til it becomes almost, it's not quite the person,
but you're capturing something about them.
It's kind of like your Arnold was became,
Well, that's only, I just watched you doing Arnold,
and then I,
But we both blew it out to the extremes,
Yeah.
But just give me your quick, on like, 1, 2, 3.
(inaudible words with Austrian accent)
Cause I, I would, and it was just,
it became, there were no words.
You gotta see that face from this close.
You gotta have,
there were no words at a certain point.
I saw him once and he did,
he had nothing to say and we bumped into each other
and I was having coffee, and he went,
ah, coffee in the morning huh?
And I was like, yeah I'm having coffee...
It's good for you.
It's got caffeine to wake you up!
But it was crazy.
I just, I.
I do him as Mr. Positive.
Cause he never goes negative.
I remember we had a movie that
didn't do well at one point
and they're interviewing him
on the Today Show or something.
And the guys was, it didn't get the box,
Ah, it's fantastic.
Let me tell you, people are
enjoying it all over the world.
But it was lower than the other ones.
Yeah, but everything is great.
You're fantastic.
I'm fantastic.
Everything's fantastic.
And when he was governor, there'd be a fire
and he would come out,
there was a fire, forest fire
and then the fire police and the firemen
came to it with the hoses.
They came with the hoses and they sprayed the water.
And the fire is like, get out of here.
I don't like this.
(Conan laughing)