- I work at BuzzFeed (somber music)
and I had my lunch stolen.
- My lunch was stolen.
- Not only have I heard of this lunch bandit,
but I'm a victim.
- They got me.
- I'm detective Tabach,
and I'm gonna get to the bottom of this.
(mysterious classical music)
All right, so here's what's happening.
Here at BuzzFeed,
we have a lovely community of people.
The offices are great, everyone feels safe coming in.
But recently,
someone's been stealing the lunches from our fridges.
This is not the office I remember.
So, I'm gonna fix it.
I'm gonna find this person,
and I'm gonna tell 'em to, like, stop taking lunches.
I'm, like, I'm gonna ask 'em,
because that's not cool.
So, what happened was that, (somber music)
I got a sandwich, it was completely untouched,
it was wrapped in foil.
- So I put the creamer Caesar salad in the fridge,
that's done.
Set my calendar invite, pick up your salad at 4:30,
'cause, like, y'all, I could not forget it.
'Cause I'll be pissed at myself if I'm on train
and I don't have my damn salad!
- I had eaten halal cart,
I had purposely eaten only half.
I covered the rest in tinfoil.
I put my name on it, Chack, C-H-A-C-K.
And the date, 12/3.
- Two hours later when I went back to check on it,
it was gone.
- My salad's not there.
- They're gone.
These leftovers are gone.
And it just, I knew instantly, I was like,
somebody stole my lunch.
- It's one of the most (bleep) up things
I've ever seen in my life.
- It was like 4:00pm, like.
- This is 4:30.
The day's not even over!
How bold does your ass have to be
to take my salad, and it's not even 6:00pm?
I'm pissed, I'm so pissed!
So bad (chuckling).
- There was one lunch stolen,
and everyone on the floor was alerted
that the lunch was stolen,
and then not 15 minutes later,
another lunch was stolen,
from right out under our little noses.
One wasn't enough.
They went for two!
This person won't stop until they're caught.
- [Eric Voiceover] And they will be caught.
By me.
Who could it be?
- I would be shocked if this isn't you.
Eric has multiple lunches every day.
On any given day, you can walk over to Eric's desk,
pull open his bottom drawer,
and see this huge stash of snacks
that he has just been collecting for months.
I'm on your team,
and I know that you're a video short this month!
This could all just be for that extra video.
- [Eric Voiceover] Okay now I really need to figure out
who this person is
so I can prove isn't not me.
What can I do?
Um.
I could be a refrigerator bouncer,
and I can write everything down,
and I'll know if somebody's taking out something
they didn't put in.
That'll probably freak out the thief,
so that's not gonna work.
Oh, maybe I could be like a far away refrigerator bouncer?
But then I'm not gonna be able to see anything,
so that's not gonna work.
What if I, what if I talk to security,
and they could show me the security footage.
But I don't wanna get security involved just yet.
Oh my God!
I could do, like, GPS track food.
So I could put a GPS, and then I could make a gourmet dish,
and then I could wrap it up,
and I could put it in the fridge and wait for it.
But what if it doesn't get stolen.
(phone vibrating)
Great, five more people had their lunch stolen.
I have to actually do something about this!
I'm gonna talk to more people.
Everybody in the office was talking about it.
And after asking a bunch of people who they thought it was,
two names popped up.
- To be honest I kinda think it was Clark,
just because I've never seen him buy lunch.
- I think it's Victor.
He's too happy, too happy.
You can't trust a person who's always happy all the time.
- It was definitely Clark,
'cause he's a sneaky little (bleep).
- I think it's Vic.
He is always in the kitchen, he has easy access.
- [Eric Voiceover] I decided to interview my two suspects.
Clark and Vic.
- No.
- There is, there is some drama that got pretty violent,
I think, last year.
So we had this beloved, giant toy,
called Rasta Frog, and he went missing.
And nobody could find him.
Five days later we find him, in a dumpster,
outside of BuzzFeed, with his throat slit.
(ominous music) - [Eric Voiceover] I have
no idea what Clark is talking about,
so I'm just gonna move on.
- What's going on?
- I am actually a villain.
- [Eric] Get out! - I mean!
A victim!
But, no, I am a victim of the lunch burglar (laughing).
- [Eric] I don't know what to do
with any of this information.
I need to take this to the top.
(classic mafia music)
I decided to meet with a private investigator.
His office was very intimidating,
and he had statues of himself,
pictures of himself,
pictures of him with famous people, and more famous people.
I thought I was just meeting
with a regular private investigator,
I didn't realize I was meeting
with the private investigator.
Oh boy.
Thank you for doing this, by the way,
thank you for meeting with me.
- You didn't even know who the (bleep) I was.
- I know, I didn't--
- I mean, where did you wake up?
In a (bleep) pumpkin patch or something?
- I actually, I don't know private investigators.
- Forget about private investigators.
I was a New York City homicide detective.
Son, here.
See these dead people here?
All shot in the head?
10 dead, the Palm Sunday Massacre.
Son, you gotta do a little due diligence
before you come and talk to the man.
What?
You never saw pictures like that, right?
- [Eric] No. - Never saw dead, dead,
shot in the (bleep) head, right son?
- I'm only getting into investigation now.
This is my first investigation ever.
So in our office, (mysterious music)
we have had somebody steal food
from the public refrigerator, so we have--
- Steal food?
- We have a community fridge,
just like every office.
And somebody's been taking the food, it's--
- Do you clean it out normally?
- [Eric] It's only cleaned out on Fridays,
but people are losing their food every single day now.
- Well do they, I mean,
they actually get rid of everything on Friday?
- [Eric] Everything, yeah.
- 'Cause that (bleep) smells after a while.
Yeah, it smells like dead body.
- But it's missing not on Fridays,
like new food.
Somebody got salad,
and somebody took the salad out of the box.
- You know, you got the (bleep) detective in the world,
and we're asking about salad being stolen
out of a friggin' refrigerator.
- It's a big, it's become a big issue in the office.
- Oh, it's big.
But how (bleep) big is it really?
I hope it's not romaine salad.
- It's still deadly?
Then we could place romaine in the fridge.
Whoever takes the romaine,
then they'll be (bleep) themselves,
and we'll catch 'em.
- Well (laughing).
Well I'm gonna give you a little secret.
- Yes?
- Look up there.
Eh?
Up there. - [Eric] Where?
(acapella beats)
The planes?
- Son, if that eight, that (bleep) camera don't jump out
and hit you--
- Oh my gosh!
I'm allowed to just set up a camera?
- Yes, yes you can.
The law of New York State, each State is different.
Two party consent.
New York State is a one party consent.
Right now you're recording me,
I know you're recording me.
That's perfectly legal.
And even if you were, tape recorder on you,
without these cameras, and you talk to me and recorded me,
perfectly legal.
Some States it's not,
you have to have the other person's consent.
New York is, it's a one party State.
- Once I figure it out, (ominous music)
I just scare them (hands slapping together)
so they stop doing it?
- No, I would question 'em,
straight up.
Were you taking that salad out of that refrigerator?
Were you hungry?
What was the reason?
You know, 'cause some people are hurting.
Some people are on a diet, they're gonna eat salad,
and maybe that's their only means of energy and nutrients,
and they're stealing the (bleep) thing!
- Amazing, thank you so much.
- That's it? - That's it!
- Oh my God!
So you call upon the top detective in the world,
to ask me about (bleep) salad in the refrigerator?
- [Eric Voiceover] I now knew (peaceful music)
how to private investigate a situation.
So I went back to the office.
I set up a camera facing the refrigerator,
and I watched.
After 3.5 hours, I saw the refrigerator thief
steal my friend's sandwich!
So I messaged him to meet in a private room.
I walked over, I planned to record the entire conversation
on my iPhone, (door opening)
and this is the audio.
Hey what's up? - [Thief] Hey, what's up man?
- [Erik] Thanks for (microphone knocking)
coming in, sorry.
I just had a,
I just wanted to ask you real quick.
I think um.
I think I saw you, like, stealing a lunch.
- [Thief] What?
What are you talking about?
- [Eric] Did you?
Did you take someone's lunch today by any chance?
- [Thief] No.
I didn't take someone's lunch.
What are you talking about?
- [Eric] Oh, okay, my,
no, yeah, my bad.
I don't know, I, no.
- [Thief] Do you have me confused with somebody else?
- [Eric] Maybe.
I'm sorry.
No, no, my bad.
You're good.
- [Thief] You sure? - [Eric] Yeah.
- [Thief] Okay.
All right, I'm gonna get outta here.
- [Eric] Thanks.
Thanks for coming in!
Have a happy day.
Have a good day.
(door closing)
(ominous music)
- That was definitely the guy.
I just felt, like, way too uncomfortable.
I'm not an actual detective, obviously.
I couldn't do it,
I couldn't.
But it was definitely him.
Was it him? (mysterious music)
I decided to go back and rewatch the surveillance footage.
It was him.
Bu he wasn't the only one.
I realized there was no serial lunch thief.
I couldn't believe it.
Anybody could steal a lunch.
Everybody in the world eats food!
Everybody.
That means it could be your family member,
your lover, these people in this stock footage.
Christian was right, I could be me.
It could be you.
(metal rubbing on metal)