[sighs]
- You said drop her. - No! I said...
Oh, forget it.
[sighs] Let's just take her to...
- [groaning] - She's waking up!
Yeah, 'cause you dropped her!
What?
What happened?
These!
- What are... - Wait for it.
What...!
No way.
Are those...?
- Hot slacks! - Shut up!
You shut up!
Jasper!
Oh, hey, Piper.
Did you go into my bathroom and take my curling iron?
Henry snuck out of his room last night
and didn't sneak back in until one in the morning!
[gasping]
Well, last Saturday night while you guys were out,
Piper and her friend Marla watched "French Basement".
[gasping]
Piper!
That movie's rated R.
You know you're not allowed to watch R-rated movies.
Come on! I didn't hear anything I hadn't heard before.
[blowing horn]
[chatter]
[blowing horn]
This meeting of the Man Fans can now begin.
Point of order.
[groaning]
Oops! That slipped out of my hand.
- Excuse me, Piper. - Yes?
Is there any way you could, uh, drive a little faster?
We need to drive faster.
But that would be speeding and I can't break the law.
Little girl, we are the law.
You need to drive faster.
[honking]
Get out of the way!
[honking]
♪ The table's set Break the baguette ♪
♪ Let's eat While the soup's still wet ♪
♪ It's time for lunch! ♪
♪ Lunch! ♪
[panting]
Don't change the channel!
Dang it, Piper, you're not even watching TV.
I am so!
No, you're looking at your phone
and your laptop and your Pear Pad.
And the TV.
[screaming]
Henry?
[screaming]
Hey, guys, how about more puzzling
and less staring at your phones scrolling through TwitFlash?
Hang on, I'm so sorry.
I'm gonna stop in just a second.
Dad, can you believe this...?
Hang on, Henry,
Trent Overunder is on a rant.
Oh, wow!
Hey, can I have my phone back?
[in unison] No.
Es un nuevo día en Fred Langosta!
[laughing]
Quién conozca la langosta? Fred conoce la langosta!
No solo coma la langosta, coma Fred Langosta.
What the...?
Fred Langosta!
Para comida.
Hey, what's up, fam--
Oh, my God! What is that smell?
- I'm cooking. - Oh...
That's what smells so...
good.
Thanks.
You didn't tell me Piper was cooking.
She's making fish lasagna.
Each layer is a different fish!
Hey, guys, does catfish ever go bad?
[sniffs] It's probably fine.
So, how does everybody like my tuna Parmesan?
Oh, it's so good!
- It's great! - Great!
I'm loving it.
Yay! I'll go get more tuna sauce.
Here's more sauce.
[unenthusiastic cheering]
If you guys don't like my dinner...
then dinner is over!
All right, that's it!
- Uh, Piper-- - Hey, skunk bag!
I don't know how much longer
I can keep this cake from melting.
Then we better eat it now! I'll go first.
Uh, no. No, no! We have to wait for Henry.
Well, you've got to give me something, Jasper!
I'm bored!
I need something to do with my hands.
I feel weird if I'm not doing anything with my hands.
[romantic music playing]
♪ Let's be together! ♪
He is wonderful.
Isn't he?
Yeah. Where'd you find him?
Oh, I'll never tell.
[laughing]
[whispering] ...Keep running through the town.
Upstairs, downstairs. In his nightgown.
I don't why you had to say anything!
Are you kidding me?
I was in the middle of a take.
What are you doing?
What does it look like I'm doing?
I'm recording nursery rhymes very softly
and alternating microphones for kids with sensitive ears.
It's actually really sweet of you--
Shut your word hole!
Okay.
Now get out so I can record my very quiet nursery rhymes
in peace.
I'll be in my room.
Don't care where, just get quiet.
Wee Willy Winky, take two.
You sure you know how to play the piano?
Nobody actually knows how to play the piano.
I mean, look at this thing.
There's, like, a million buttons.
Fortunately, my phone just has one button.
[piano music starts playing]
Squeeze it! Come on, squeeze it!
No, no! Don't squeeze it!
No, don't! No!
[screaming]
Ay, Dios mío!
[panting]
[laughs] Now let's watch this one!
No, no! Please!
No more pimple popping videos!
Okay, you don't have to watch.
No, I wanna watch!
Well, do you or don't you?
Yeah... No...
I don't know!
What have you done to me?!
Okay, our test is tomorrow.
That means we have seven hours
to learn an entire semester of algebra.
You think we can do it?
I think so.
As long as we don't have any distractions or--
[phone ringing]
One second.
Yeah, what?
Who? What channel?
'Kay, I'll call you back!
- What's going on? - Hush!
- We gotta-- - You're coming with--
Oh, yeah!
[screaming]
- That's Junk N' Stuff! - What's Junk--
It's the store where my brother works.
- You ready for that? - Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
I'm going go eat food on television!
Wait, what about our algebra?
Get your hands off Kid Danger!
[screaming]
[cheering and screaming]
Not acceptable.
If you guys don't take me trick-or-treating right now,
then I'll tell Mom and Dad--
No! Why did you do that?
She was talking so much!
Now, come on! We've got to go see what Ray wants!
- Grab her feet. - Oh, man.
[grunting]
- Happy Halloween! - Shabbat Shalom!