E: Looks good.
*Le clap*
*T: Big Burp*
M: 'Sup.
It's me.
Mark.
With ya bois.
Ethan, and Tyler.
We're gonna be doing some Easter
E: The Resurrection of Christ! *LAUGHS*
M: Gather round, gather round, children, gather round.
We're here to talk about something very special today.
E: Oh!
M: Easter eggs.
E: *evil chuckle*
Now when I was a child, I couldn't afford to do Easter eggs.
Wow
We couldn't even afford eggs.
So I am here to relive the history of Easter,
and the Easter Bunny- and the Easter Bunny,
and how he affects our lives to this very day.
Do you know how to make an Easter Egg?
*ETHAN MAKES SHARP INHALATIONS*
T: You shove an egg up a... bunny.
E: Go, go.
M: I mean, it WILL be colorful! *LAUGHS*
M: Yes! Traditionally in Ancient Germany,
They used to gather all the rabbits in the countryside--
E: Ancient Germany?
M: Yes! Ancient Germ--
Hey, which one of us is German? (all three?? a little at least)
E: Uh, a little bit...
M: ..is the German one.
- E: Mr. Nestor-Darling! - T: Scheid? Excuse you?
T: Scheid is German!
M: No one cares!
T: Dangit!
M: Listen, in Ancient Germany,
they gathered rabbits all around the campfire,
they gathered some eggs, and they just started shoving!
And they shoved, and they shoved, and they shoved, and it was like a piñata,
except instead of hitting it, they kept shoving until it EXPLODED!
And all the children ran around with their mouths open:
"I'm gettin' some! And I'm gettin' some!"
Some of those German souls,
*EXAGGERATED ACCENT* "Ach bin... I'ma getting sommen!"*T laughs*
And then they caught them and then you know, uh...
They celebrated Easter!
M: So we don't have any rabbits unfortunately, but we do have a Tyler. *Tyler begins to panic*
So we're gonna stuff him full of eggs as hard as we can until he explodes.
*holds up cups for protection* Oh, yeah, those will help. Those will help.
Cut the bottom off and we have a funnel. Yeah, and shove them in there.
So uh *Mark.Exe has stopped working* we're gonna make-- I honestly have no idea.
(E: laughs)
E: What the hell? What IS this?!
Wait, what is THIS?!
M: What is THAT?
E: I don't know... What is THIS?
M: Coloring whip? With colorf-- With food safe foam?
*big confusion*
E: I-- What?!
M: Foam?!
E: Don't you just put an egg into a thing then it's colorful?
M: No, that's stupid.
You're stupid.
M: Do we have eggs? We have eggs.
We have eggs, right?
E: We have eggs.
E: We have the PAAS!
M: It's German. What does it mean?
E: PAAS:
Piss.. Ass... Ass...
(Ethan chuckles while Mark cackles)
M:(strained) Yeah, go on, finish it.
E: OoooOOOOoooo, alright!
Piss Ass Ass... Selebrate. With an S.
(MARK WHEEZES)
Because it's a special day, it's Easter Day.
(M LAUGHS)
Put your "Piss Ass Ass" into the your "Selebration" bowl. Whisk it up--
M: No that's for the foam!
- E: Oh, it's upside down. - M: I don't know why you have foam.
M: Why do you have foam?
E: Why did they cut it here?
M: (HIGH-PITCHED) I don't know!
E: Should I put this in here?
M: Oh sure. yeah, you know what? I guess you're- you're doing foam.
E: *makes it rain powder*Alright. That goes there.
E: The "Piss Ass Ass" whisking...
Le Concerned Mark: We're gonna die!
We're gonna die. Why'd you pour it so high?
E: I don't know! M: DON'T BLOW IT!;)
E: It's- it's okay. It's contained.
E: Oh, okay, so I need a third of a cup. Let's do a guessing game.
M: Did we start?
E: Yeah, haha, sure.
M: We haven't started yet.
We haven't even- we haven't even introduced what we're doing!
E: You told me to put it in the mixing bowl!
M: NO! You said to yourself!
"Should I put it in the mixing bowl?"
And you went, "uh okay!"
E: Wait, you said yes, didn't you?
M: I didn't know what I was saying yes to, man!
You can't say that I told YOU to do THAT.
M: *EXHALES* Papa?!
Tyler nearly gets impaled*
*ETHAN INHALES SHARPLY*
M: God...
*Ethan's mating call*
M: Listen, listen...
Listen, what are you doing?
T: *WEIRD ACCENT* Making dye!
M: Alright...
M: Okay, so, T: I don't know where the table spoons are.
M: Here's the rules. *Ethan doz a snez* (bless you)
We're gonna make three, just three delightful eggs.
*nosey itchy*
As delightful as you want. They are your babies.
These eggs are going to be your babies.
These eggs are your babies.
E: Babies?
M: They're your babies.
T: They are my babies or your babies?
- E: Can I have a whisk? - M: I'm saying your bab-
M: I'm literally saying your babies.
E: Can I have a whisk?
This is not a whisk???
Mark begins to rethink this video as bangs and clatters are heard in the backround*
P: Ah! No.
P: It's orange, it's Easter orange.
- E: It's Easter orange, Mark. Easter orange! - P: Here you go. Bye.
M: Not even close.
Nope. There you go.
Listen, guys, you're not listening. Stop mixing just dry powder.
(Let the smol bean do it) *Ethan giggles*
E: But doesn't it taste good?
*ETHAN INHALES THEN CHOKES*
*MARK AND TYLER LAUGH*
*ETHAN INHALES SHARPLY*
M: How many years did you just take off your life from the...
.."Piss Ass Ass"... what was it?
M: Okay, you're gonna pick three eggs. Just--
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD LISTEN TO ME!
We haven't said go, we haven't started, we haven't done nothing!
How many makes have we done?
E: Two.
M: We're gonna pick three eggs.
We are on our own to decorate them
- M: in whatever-- - E: Three eggs each?
M: Yes, three eggs apiece.
We're on our own to decorate them.
We'll get ten minutes to dye them, decorate them
in whatever way you can to the best of your abilities.
And at the end of then we will judge them.
Makes sense?
E: Makes sense.
M: Sound fair
*BlankGamePlays says hi*
Alright, you can divvy up the-- not- not going yet,
but just- you can have the cups in front of you
for the dye and the yada, and the whatever...
E: Don't worry...
*WAR FLASHBACKS AND SAD PIANO MUSIC*
E: Don't worry, it's fine, just water.
*WAR FLASHBACKS AND SAD PIANO MUSIC*
E: Go?
*ETHAN AND TYLER LAUGH*
Go? Go?
M: Go..
E: Oh, this doesn't look good.
Oh! *CHUCKLES*
*ETHAN LAUGHS*
M: Good for you man.
E: Okay, okay.
*ETHAN LAUGHS*
M: No, this?
Friendly?
Friendly??????
Oh, God!
The last time I decorated eggs was as a child,
and I don't really remember it,
but, I'm trying to follow what it's saying.
*EGG DROPS*
What the- what the hell did you do?!
E: A little bit.
Every color.
T: Oh my God, Ethan.
You didn't read the instructions.
E: I did, uh, a little.
*small laughter*
*abomination of egg*
M: So I was given a tray.
I'm assuming that means I'm gonna hand drop these colors onto it.
Oh this is staining!
But I'ma hand drop them on
and then that's what they're gonna be.
E: Mine's coming into fruition.
I'm gonna leave him in there for a minute.
Three eggs? Good enough.
M: No, no, no, no, no. How much time we got?
How much time we got? What-- where we...
- M: That's fine! That's plenty of time. - E: Oh that's plenty.
*ETHAN CLEARS THROAT*
Let's pause the time real quick, just pause it,
cuz we need to talk about some things.
We're having a family meeting everybody.
E: Family meeting?
M: Family meeting.
Don't you look at whatever I'm doing. Shut up.
E: Are we in trouble?
M: Yes, you're all-- you've been very naughty. The both of you.
Look at me when I'm talking with you.
Not with that face!
Not with that one either.
There we go, and look at me.
And you look at me.
You've been very naughty.
Been bad this Easter.
E: Oh.
M: Do it again.
E: Oh!
M: You too!
Not me, you!
*SLAPPING SOUNDS WHILE MARK CUSSES QUIETLY*
*sLAPPITY SLAPSLAP*
M: Alright!
ow
Alright, have you learned your lesson?
E: Yeah.
M: All right. Good. Go!
*ETHAN MAKES MONKEY LAUGHTER*
M: Okay, it sounds good.
E: Well, mine are baking, so... How you guys doing?
M: *HIGH-PITCHED* Oh yeah...
Think I did something wrong. Was this supposed to be vinegar?
T: It's supposed to be vinegar. Not the whole thing,
but, this much. Times two.
And it was supposed to go on...
MARK: Shhh everybody go away!
ETHAN: You're gonna spill that on the floor!
M: No I'm not, No I'm not, No I'm not.
Oooh! Look at me!
E: Tyler, how's yours going?
T: They're soaking like good, a little...
M: I'm back!
*SINGSONGY* Hey~ Hi~
We're getting the vinegar~
M: How's my coming?
Oh, you know. Comes and goes.
E: How many eggs? Three eggs?
M: Yes, three eggs. What are YOU doing?
E: Just waitin'.
M: For what?!
E: Time to do it's thing, you know how time works...
*Pink Panther Tune*
- M: No! - E: Comes and goes!
E: It's the Easter Bunny!
*DRAMATIC SOUND EFFECT*
M: Oh ah! Hi!
P: *AWKWARDLY* Oh, hi, sorry, just grabbing...
*EASTER SONIC dASHES AWAY*
E: Wait, Tyler's boiling his eggs. Should we have done that?
M: What? What are you doing?
T: Shh!
M: What-- I-- We don't have time for that!
E: How much time do we have?
M: What kind of chaos world has this become?
E: Do I have to take my eggs out within the minute,
or after the minute can I take them out?
All right.
M: Huh? Rulemaker!
E: Another ten?
M: How about another five?
M: Uh, well, the rulemaker has spoken.
M: When we're done, we're done. You know, art can't be rushed.
E: I need vinegar.
A: You okay Mark?
*LAUGHTER IN BACKGROUND*
M: I just realized what I was doing.
There's a pool of pink dye inside here now.
I can't layer colors like I thought it was gonna do.
Oh!
Oh, what are you doing?
That's the worst thing I've ever seen!
That's supposed to be FOAM!
E: How much time do we have?
M: I don't like living under this kind of freedom.
I need a time constraint.
I need to feel the guillotine above my neck.
Why are these wet?
E: Oh, it's because I spilled water.
*MARK AND ETHAN LAUGHS*
M: *WHIMPERS* Oh..
*bye bye box*
M: Alright...
E: I'm gonna do an experiment with one.
I'm gonna put it in boiling water.
What will happen?
T: Whoa whoa whoa!
E: No.
Oh, no!
It cracked.
E: Don't worry about it.
Oww, it's boiling water. Oww.
C: Did that change colors?
E: Yeah. It did. I don't know how.
I'll just rest you right there, little guy.
M: I'm done.
E: Done?
M: I've finished.
T: I have one minute?
*MARK CHORTLES*
*Scared Mark ponders in confusion and amusement*
M: What was your thought process?
E: Obviously there wasn't one!
M: Last egg thing, WE were fine, YOU spread your disease...
..your egg-based disease to me.
It hasn't quite reached Tyler yet, but next time we do an egg thing...
T: No he got me, it splattered on my face.
*footage from Markiplier Makes: An Egg Drop*
M: Oh... Just... *UNINTELLIGIBLE*
AAARRRGGGHHH!
What's the time at?
E: This happens every time.
M: Yeah, Ethan, you go first
E: I go first?
M: Yeah, go first. E: All three eggs? Are we presenting?
M: Yeah, sure.
E: Alright.
Here they are.
We've got Egg, he's got "egg" written all over him.
We've got number two. Here he is, I call him.... Hat!
E: Yeah, that's what he's doing.
And then we have... the last one, that turned pink.
He's got a little spewage going on,
but that doesn't mean that he doesn't like to party, you know?
M: *SIGHS* Okay...
Larry, Barry, and Scary. That's it.
*APPLAUSE*
T: Mine are themed. You've got Mama Bunny egg...
..with her two beautiful themed boys.
M: Yeah, okay, alright.
But we are not judging them on appearance... at all.
Appearance has nothing to do with this.
We're judging these on strength.
- E: What? - M: Strength of will. Strength of ability.
Doesn't matter how pretty they are, how they look. This is WAR!
And my champions, Larry, Barry, and Scary,
are gonna crush the snot out of your eggs!
Who's going first?
E: I don't know what we're doing.
M: Who's going first?
E: I'll go first.
M: Alright, who do you volunteer?
E: I volunteer Egg.
*TYLER LAUGHS*
M: I volunteer Barry.
We're at war. We fight. Whichever one breaks first... dies.
E: Ready?
M: Yeah
E: Set... Go.
M: No we actually gotta... *LAUGHS*
E: Ready? Go!
M: C'mon.
YEAH! YEAH!
T: You lost. M: Hang on...
M: Die, die, gimme that!
E: No, no ,no, you don't touch him!
M: Put him down!
*MARK AND TYLER LAUGH*
YEAH BARRY!
E: His body will remain...
M: Alright. On the battlefield.
Alright, who's gonna go up against Barry?
E: Blue boy.
M: Blue Boy's gonna go? Alright. Here we go.
M: Uh-oh.
*TYLER LAUGHS*
Barry, no! Barry! BARRY! NO! NO!
E: Leave his corpse there.
T: The Scheid's the winner.
E: Alright. Graduated life, bitch.
M: Oh no, his armor!
E: AAAAHAHAHA! YES, GRADUATION!
M: Alright, Larry. Larry it's time to avenge your brother, Barry.
M: HaHAAhaha!
E: No...
*MARK LAUGHS*
T: You're getting Scheid towards you.
M: Alright.
M: AAAAAHHHHH!
T: Scheid!
E: What are we doing?
T: BRING IT ON!
E: Well, mine's already dying...
T: Yeah, bring it on.
E: I'm going to take off his cap.
T: Well he'd lost forfeit.
M: That's not gonna help him
E: No, you don't know anything.
M: Oh. He's risking all.
E: C'mon!
T: Alright.
E: Go! 'Till he breaks!
T: He already broke!
E: No!
*SLURPY NOISES*
*MARK LAUGHS*
P: Oh the sound!
M: I think he's broken.
T: I think he's broken.
M: I think he broke. Alright, it's up to you, Scary.
Your brothers need to be avenged.
No, it's the win- the winner takes all!
NO! SCARY!
KILL-- God...
T: Scheid, boy!
M: Now they have to fight. *CHUCKLES*
E: Brothers!
- M: Mother! - T: No, mother!
E: Oedipus, no
T: SHE KILLED THE BROTHER!
Mother Scheid!
I'm just squishing her face...
*TYLER LAUGHS*
M: Finish it, you gotta finish it.
T: It's not going in any further.
T: Oh no... look...
C: The plastic protected it.
(PAM MAKES VOMIT NOISE)
M: Oh God...
And we have a winner!
M: The... the blood...
T: Golden egg!
M: The bloodthirsty Golden egg,
here to rein supreme over all the dead.
Thank you everybody for joining us for this Easter special.
I hope you enjoyed it.
E: This year was special.
M: It sure was special.
Thank you all for a wonderful time with "Markiplier Makes".
And remember...
Even if it's not the prettiest egg--
well in this case the prettiest egg won-- but!
Even if it's not the prettiest egg, It can still fight!
So thank you everybody so much for watching.
Check out Ethan's channel at CrankGameplays,
Tyler's got a Twitch over at Apocalypto_12,
and I'm Markiplier.
And as always, we'll see you in the next one.
Buh-bye!
T: Bye!
*end tape*