But if you knew that you were born knowing
that you're enough, and all you had to do
was put back what was already there,
then your life would change.
So I'm going to tell you a story.
So many years ago, I was in LA, and I was working on a show,
and my producer rang me and said,
"Could you please go to Beverly Hills?
"Because we have this major movie star who's falling apart.
"And if he doesn't turn up on the set tomorrow,
"it costs $10,000 a minute to film this show.
"And if he doesn't turn up, we're royally screwed.
"And you seem to be able to handle these people.
"So could you go and see him?"
I'm like, "Sure."
And they said, "Now, what kind of car have you got?"
I said, "I've got a red Mustang."
It was a really cool convertible.
They went, "Oh, no, no, no, no.
"You cannot put that on his driveway
"because he can only have Jaguars, thank you, or Porsches."
So I'm like, "Okay."
So I've got my rather,
I thought it was a rather lovely Mustang.
I drove along to this big, massive,
amazing mansion in Beverly Hills.
And I hid my little inferior car around the corner.
I couldn't even put it outside his house.
And I rang the bell and he opened the door.
Most movie stars don't really open the door.
And he went, "I don't know why you're here.
"I don't know why they sent some Brit to fix me.
"Do you know I've been in every rehab, every clinic,
"I've seen every therapist in LA and no one can help me."
Well, that's an interesting belief.
I said, "Oh, I can help you."
Anyway, we walked into this amazing house.
And I said, "Wow. I love your house."
He went, "Ugh, I hate this house. My neighbors are hell."
There's that word. "And I'm moving."
And then he said to me, "You know, you look
"a bit like my fourth wife."
I said, "Thank you." He said, "Don't thank me."
He said, "She was the biggest disappointment in my life."
Okay, so he's had four wives,
they've all disappointment him, hates his house,
can't have anything except a Porsche on the drive.
And then we go into the den.
And he's got a BAFTA, which is the equivalent of an Oscar.
And I'm like, "Oh, you have a BAFTA."
He said, "That's a curse.
"Do you know what that is like, getting a BAFTA?"
He said, "Every time I make a film, I've got
"to get another BAFTA, and it's now a curse to me.
"I wish I'd never got it.
"Because I just feel this pressure all the time,
"because I'm a BAFTA-winning actor."
And I went, "Oh, I know what's wrong with you."
He went, "No, you don't." And I said, "I do.
"I know exactly what's wrong with you."
He said, "What is it then?"
I said, "Well, you just don't think
"you're good enough, do you?"
And he said, "Really, is that true?"
I'm like, "Come on, you know it's true.
"Four wives that disappointed you,
"this incredible house that you hate.
"The Ferrari on the drive, 'The BAFTA is a curse.'"
He was very overweight too. And I said, "It's you.
"If I was doctor, I'd go, 'Okay, I'm a doctor.
"'I'm diagnosing you right now.
"'This is your illness' you don't think you're enough.
"'Would you like a cure? Here's my prescription;
"'tell yourself you're enough.'
"First, tell me a bit about your life."
He said, "Well, I was raised in a trailer park.
"We had no money.
"My mom was a nurse, but she worked at nights,
"because she got more money.
"My dad was in construction.
"And, of course, in the winter, often when it snowed,
"there was no work.
"And I used to make my dad's dinners,
"because my mom was working nights.
"And he had a construction worker's dinner;
"meat, potatoes, vegetables.
"And I had bread and milk. Every night, bread and milk.
"But I cooked this dinner for my dad and I never got it."
And I said, "Well, did he share it?"
He went, "Are you kidding? My dad gave the leftovers to the dog
"right in front of me to show me that that's what I was."
And I went, "Well, that's where it's come from.
"Let's look at this little boy.
"Mom's working nights, and all a child can think is,
"'If my mom loved me, she'd be here.
"'She prefers work.'"
Because they haven't got the intellect at five
to work out what's going on.
A child can only think one thing, "My mom isn't here,
"I don't have a dad, we don't have money.
"Why is that?
"Oh, it's because I'm not lovable enough.
"Otherwise, we'd have money, and my mom would be here,
"my dad would be nice.
"My dad prefers the dog, because I'm not enough."
All children turn it inside.
Because if a child works out that the parents are not very good,
that's too scary, so they blame themselves.
I said, "Okay. So you can see where this comes from.
"Mom is not there, Dad likes the dog.
"You get inferior food. You live in a trailer.
"And you think you're not enough.
"And that's why you've become famous, by the way,
"because you believed if you were a famous actor,
"everybody would love you,
"and finally, you'd think you're enough.
"But it doesn't work, because everyone does love you,
"including the four wives, but you don't love you.
"And the voice in your head is, 'I'm not enough.'"
I said, "So let's fix it."
So he happened to hoard a lot of stuff too;
classic symptom of someone who thinks they're not enough.
And having had four wives,
he had a lot of lipstick in his house,
a lot of eyeliner, luckily for me.
So we went down, and I wrote it on his mirrors,
"I am enough," all over his house.
It was a big house too.
And I took his phone, and I put
on his phone alerts, "I am enough."
And it pinged every morning and it pinged every night.
And I said, "Look, you can write it on your hand,
"write it on your t-shirt, write it on a cushion.
"I want you to say every morning, 'I am enough.'
"Especially in the shower.
"What else are you going to say in there?
"'I've run out of conditioner'?
"You might as well take that time, we all shower every day,
"to say, 'I am enough,' wire it into a habit.
"And write it on your bath mirror,
"so as you clean your teeth, you go,
"'Oh, there's that thing.
"'I'm enough, I'm enough, I'm enough.'"
I said, "You must say it over and over again.
"Because you're going to make what is unfamiliar,
"knowing you're enough, so familiar
"that it stops being what you say
"and it becomes who you are."
So he promised he would do it.
It was better for him; he'd done all those other things.
Anyway, weeks passed, I was working on my own show,
he was working on his show.
And I was walking to my trailer.
I was, like, walking along.
And I saw a man only about as far ahead of me as that chair.
And as I got closer, first he undid his pants,
then he undid his shirt.
I'm like, "Wow, is this guy going to flash me
"on a movie lot in Beverly Hills?
"Where's security?"
But then I realized it was him.
Then he went, "Look, I've got so thin.
"I've got a six-pack, I've got a flat stomach.
"Because I say, 'I am enough.'"
He said, "You know, what's amazing
"is I stopped eating donuts.
"I stopped bingeing.
"I just say, 'I am enough," every day.
"And I seem to have fallen in love with my body,
"and I've stopped abusing it."
I said, "Well, that's habit."
He goes, "No, no, but guess what else?"
I'm like, "What?" He said, "I've sold the Porsche
"and I've got a Mini.
"Because I'm not a fat, cranky b*stard anymore,
"and I don't need it."
And he said, "And guess what else?
"I'm going out with a hairdresser."
He said, "I've never had a girlfriend
"that wasn't a model or an actress."
He said, "It's so normal. I'm just happy.
"Who would have thought those three words
"would change my entire life?"
I said, "Well, they do that."
Their strength is in their simplicity.
It heals your soul."
When most people wake up and go,
"I'm a goddess, I'm a goddess,"
your brain goes, "You're not a goddess,
"you've got cellulite.
"And what should be up here is actually down here.
"So I don't really think you're a goddess."
But it's you saying that.
When you drive around town going,
"Hey, yeah, I'm a rockstar, got my rock moves."
Your brain goes, "But you're driving a car
"that's 15 years old, and you share an apartment.
"You're not really a rockstar, come on."
But when you say, "I am enough, I am enough, I am enough,"
your brain goes, "Of course you are.
"That's how you were born. Why wouldn't you be?"
And so, for him, it really healed his soul.
There's nothing that 'I Am Enough' can't heal.
It was so simple, but his mind let it in.
So anyway, many, many months passed, and he called me.
And he said, "Hello, it's me. Guess where I am."
I said, "I honestly don't know."
He said, "Well, I'm in Iceland.
"And I'm fishing, and guess what else?"
I said, "Tell me." He said, "I'm happy.
"I've never been so happy in my entire life.
"I'm just sitting with a fishing rod
"in a freezing cold place, and I'm so happy."
And I said, "Well, good."
And, you know, some of you here might go,
"You know, I know this. I've seen your YouTube,
"I've read your book, I know about 'I Am Enough.'"
But I want to ask you something else.
What about your children? What about your parents?
Or the people you work with? What about your husband,
your wife, your girlfriend, your boyfriend?
What about other people's children that you influence?
You know, 'I Am Enough' isn't just for you.
And everybody here says, "I'd love to change the world."
But that's really a big ask. Changing the world?
I change people, just one heart and one soul at a time.
And I change them because I live 'I Am Enough.'
I say it in the shower every day.
I don't go, "Oh, I'm getting a bit old,"
or, "Oh, this isn't quite the body I had 10 years ago."
I just say, "I am enough," all the time.
And I feel it.