I have this bowl, I don't know where it came from, bowl
of interesting questions.
Oh.
That's what it says right there.
And so I thought, I will read some and you will--
OK.
I don't know what they are.
Oh, boy.
[LAUGHTER]
And we'll see if they're interesting
and if you want to answer them.
If you could only say one word the rest of your life,
what would it be?
[BLEEP]
OK.
[LAUGHTER]
That could be good or bad.
Yeah.
That works positively and negatively.
If you could have any superpower, what would it be?
Oh, I don't know.
The superpower to pick up a check, maybe, at a restaurant,
maybe.
Other people pay, usually.
I'm an [BEEP]
[LAUGHTER]
Superpower to go out and be like, "I'll get this."
Right.
I never do that.
No, I'm joking.
[LAUGHTER]
Because people do it before you, or you just avoid it?
No.
I just am like, "You should get this."
I drove all the way to the east side for you,
so you pay for the meal.
I see.
I never go to the east side.
That's the ticket.
Oh that's the ticket.
Yeah.
I have like a five mile radius.
I only stay--
[LAUGHTER]
I won't go to the east side.
I mean, there are people like, "There's
such a good restaurant there."
And like.
"I'm not going to the east side."
No, that side of 4 or 5.
No, thanks.
Yeah.
That's like Californians, how'd you get there?
No way.
Yeah.
Who was your first celebrity crush?
Oh Phoebe Cates in Gremlins.
Oh.
Yeah.
Yes.
I don't know if you guys remember Gremlins.
I remember going fast times, no.
It was Gremlins.
OK.
Massive crowd.
All right.
Everybody write that down.
[LAUGHTER]
Yeah.
If you could be someone else for the day, who would it be?
Ellen.
Yeah.
[LAUGHTER]
Would you like to be me?
Yeah.
I'd like to do this.
I wish I had the balls to do this.
Do you want to do this one day?
I wish I could--
Seth Meyers, you, I have friends who do this and I'm always
like, "How do you--" I don't know.
It's just real skill.
Yeah.
It's awesome.
We hope so.
Yeah.
No, it's like really cool.
Yeah.
But I think you'd be great at.
It's fun.
It's just being interested in other people
and talking to them.
Then you have to listen.
[LAUGHTER]
What?
Like that.
What'd you say?
I want to do what you do.
Yeah.
Hmm?
[LAUGHTER]
If you could be a contestant on any game show or a reality
show, which would it be?
I don't know.
Man, I don't know.
I mean, I would like to be on Survivor just to like camp.
[LAUGHTER]
You know?
I think it's be fun just to camp and make a game out of it.
You know?
Right?
Yeah.
Isn't that what that show--
I've never seen Survivor.
Oh, OK.
[LAUGHTER]
What's the one thing you forget to do more often than anything
else?
I don't know.
I forget people's names.
Oh, yes.
I do do that.
Yeah.
We actually did a sketch about it
on SNL called What's That Name, which was about a character--
it was a game show we would do where
it was like the contestant would come out,
and it would be two contestants.
I was like, "All right.
So, first person.
For $5, who's this?"
And it would be a picture of Madonna.
And they would go, "Madonna."
All right, good.
For $10, who's this?
And its Bugs Bunny.
Oh, "Bugs Bunny." good.
I go, "Now, for a million dollars, who is this?
And it's Kenan Thompson.
He's like, "I'm your doorman.
I've worked with you for 20 years."
What's my name?
[LAUGHTER]
That's good.
That's my nightmare.
Oh, my god.
We just did-- John Mulaney hosted, we just did that.
That's hilarious.
I don't like that question.
Last one, better be a good one.
That's not good either.
[LAUGHTER]
Last one.
Who or what makes you laugh the hardest?
Oh, man.
Who makes me laugh the hardest?
Martin Short.
He is hilarious.
Martin Short makes me laugh.
When I was growing up watching SC TV and movies like Father
of the Bride and all those things,
he made me laugh so hard.
And then as a person, and now I'm
very lucky that he's a friend of mine, hanging out with him,
he makes me laugh harder than anybody I've ever met.
He's very, very funny.
They had a--
Yeah.
Anyway, go ahead.
No.
Finish.
Oh, I cut off--
we're going to be right and I was like, wait, no I'm warm.
[LAUGHTER]
It's so worth it.
No, I was at a friend's birthday party
and they had a really sweet card for them,
that was a very earnest, sweet card.
And everybody signing like, "Hey, man.
Happy birthday."
And it was all very sweet.
And Marty Short signed it, "Best pizza in town."
[LAUGHTER]
Like just not paying attention.
He's a funny guy.
[LAUGHTER]
All right.
New episodes of Barry air ever Sunday night on HBO.
Will be right back.