TGIF kiddos boy has it been a week
Monday we went BASE jumping for Aaron's
extreme sports camp Tuesday we froze
Harrison alive for magic camp I can't
fix that Wednesday was a double whammy
for arts and performance do not move a
muscle and all of these hilarious props
and gags are courtesy of Thursday's
visual comedy camp Thursday's over
Scottie go back to your tent so Gwen
which camper are we focusing on to wrap
up the week oh no come on co-counselor
who's it gonna be
it's nerve oh dear
nerfs camp what camp did nerf sign up
for nerf didn't sign up for a camp his
parents signed him up for behavioral
correction camp boot camp [ __ ] yes get
me straight in all seriousness know
better see definitive results I'm
contacting my parents I don't don't be a
sucky
I'll tell him you touched me this place
I know that's tucked away a place where
you and I can stay where we could go to
laugh and play and have adventures every
day I know it sounds hard to believe but
guys and gals it's true and Campbell is
a place for me and you please move your
legs and run with trees catch fish
monsters and honeybees there's endless
possibilities and no that's not
hyperbole or mottos camp radium and that
means I'm telling
we've got four tree hiking czarsky
biking horseback training that'll sink
though my heart attacks women out of my
name giving of rhyming for more limber
science stunts impedance patience
treasure hunting bomba
Japanese and fights
and we just get down
right we knew this day would come
I don't know if I can do this Gwen camp
is supposed to be about learning and
having fun well we're gonna learn that
little [ __ ] some manners David because
we are contractually obligated to I am
not moving back in with my parents but
I'm not tough enough to run a boot camp
thank you mm-hmm you may not be tough
enough to run a bootcamp David but I can
teach you teach me oh yeah
teach you how to be mean how to be hard
how to keep kids like nerf out there
from walking all over you after all
there's only one camper at Camp Campbell
worse than him and it's me what do you
want Devils is there no activities for a
weekend David's social security number
done gram shut up David okay no you
can't just back down the moment someone
gets in your face idiot yeah you gotta
stand up for yourself I can't do this
alone which means you've got to pull
yourself together gosh darn it you're
right Gwen today's the day I get hard
okay maybe we don't phrase it like that
oh no rule one no backing down look out
world I'm hard and I'm coming whether he
likes it or not
Murph is gonna let me in mmm Howie
so does he want to help nerve or [ __ ]
him
all righty nerf it's high time we
whipped you into shape uh Sonny now I am
confiscating that pocketknife you're
pathetic and adding blood I like those
guys I just don't know if this whole
tough-guy technique is going to work
what if we just I don't know give him a
hug those always make me feel better
no hugs you just gotta change your
perspective on life tell me how do you
feel about your Co counselor Gwen well
she's smart she helps you run activities
no no you're being positive again when's
the [ __ ] worst
she slacks off reads garbage and has no
idea what she's doing with her life what
there's no time-traveling doctor coming
to save you Gwen get your [ __ ] together
I just want to have his British baby
now it's your turn
nerf I've got a bone to pick with you
let him have it now this may sound harsh
but gosh darn it I don't think you're
very nice in fact I'd go as far to say
you're mean okay let's dig a little
deeper there idiot right I know that's
probably hard to hear no and may have
even been a little too far not at all
but by golly it seems to me like you've
never been very polite to anyone damn it
I just don't think you're aware of the
impact your behavior is having on other
campers but you know if you are aware of
that then that is some good self
awareness okay now you're just
complimenting him so the tough love
approach huh you know my uncle believes
in tough love turns out Child Protective
Services didn't though excuse me
assuming I've always been pat is pretty
narrow-minded of you David you ever
occur to you that maybe I'm just a
product of a judgmental overprotective
Society
I mean you chew one pop tie to the shape
of a gun and bam it's good suspension
sudden you're labeled a problem child
you're not like the other kids you're
bad so then you gets into a place where
other kids perpetuate the same negative
mentality making you were so that by the
time you returned at normal school life
you actually are bad thus continuing the
endless cycle of crime and punishment
and so all that's left is a little boy a
little boy who only believes he can be
what the world chancing he is a loser
I lost cars
nerve I am so sorry
whatever dicta man he is way more [ __ ]
up than I thought you two are idiots
being tough isn't the same as being an
[ __ ] you guys got to take this from a
more psychological approach how would
you know as a matter of fact I dual
majored in psychology so you have two
useless degrees yeah what are you
suggesting
well yeah you sure you don't want to get
in on this whole nerf centric adventure
today yeah I'm good
we'll probably do something crazy next
week dude is she there just kidding I
was fully aware of the situation I'm
just acting out for attention that being
said I do you think I need corrective
lenses my mom just won't take me nerf I
think it's time we all had a little talk
Oh
Seward you know Freudian thing now
everyone wants to [ __ ] their own mom get
over it mm-hmm be strong
nerf we feel as though you have a
relatively strong grasp on the events
that have led to your negative behavior
and we wanted to walk through them with
you together in the hopes of finding a
solution this isn't going to be easy but
we think put the knife down hmm ah but
we think that this is the only way we're
going to get to the root of your issues
so nerf what do you say well I think it
all started when I joined the ballet
so really are these behavioral problems
seem to be stemming from the vast
variety of issues but what's truly
important is that I don't allow
societies labels to define who I am that
choice belongs to me and me alone and I
think I finally understand that yes I
think so too nur so what are you gonna
do now damn my dad know what why I don't
know to break the cycle what do you
expect up just a kid even first but nut
she says why don't we go and what is he
getting knives gosh don't we are going
to do things my way
aggressive pacifism huh
I'll get the bandages
yeah wait nurse stop no I'm dead joking
my emotions get only be expressed as in
it's a tendency I don't want to talk or
shout or any of that I just want to give
you a hug come here little guy huh oh my
gosh nerf I am so sorry are you okay
well it really hurt geez I can't believe
I've been subjecting paper to physical
violence like this I feel kind of bad
about my behavior what yeah I think I'm
gonna go sit down to my tendon think
about what I did today sorry everybody
huh I guess you did it
David good job but I didn't hey David
thanks for everything no wait we need to
talk about this this is not okay nah man
I'm good I'm gonna tell everyone about
how you helped me today goodbye friends
well I guess it turns out at the end of
the day sometimes you just gotta hit
kids
you're officially welcome to grab your
crutches synchronize your watches
informants and couple scotches people
still enjoy bloggers are they never had
many more subtle ones like an evil
the big to check up to cover my bets
women
buzzing in the wheels [ __ ] around a
wiggle scooping out that easily
for the high positions