Holy shit
...Alright...spikes
Let's go this way
Oh my god
Come on...come one... move it along
Oh fuck. Goddammit.
Alright, shoulda saw that comin
WHAT THE FUCK?
I'm gonna be here all fuckin day
...alrighhhttt
OH MY GOD NO HE TOUCHED IT
*sighs*
HOLY FUCK WHAT THE HELL
WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO THERE?
It's fuckin impossible. It's fucking- it's fucking impossible
You can't even get over there!
What the- WHAT THE FUCK?
How the fuck did I just get up there?
Holy. Shit
THAT WHOLE FUCKING THING IS JUST BULLSHIT
You fucking dick!
Fuckin apples. Fuckin apples. I spend 20 fucking minutes downstairs getting murdered
by fucking spikes and IT REALLY IS FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE
AND NOW THERE'S FUCKING APPLES CRUSHING ME
Exploding my fucking corpse into a thousand pieces like fucking hand grenades
Fuck- I'm getting fucked by it! I'm getting fucked by fruit! It's a fruit fucker!
Hey, we're just fucking apples- they're just fucking apples- WAHH
Fucking crush your ass
Go. Go! Fuck!
THIS IS WHY I DON'T GO OUT SIDE. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS
FUCK YOU NATURE
Go! There you go
Fucking goes down
It goes fucking down!?
Fuck your face off apples
How you like dem?
Apples!
There we go
Now we're movin!
Goddammit
C'mon...double jump
Fucking shift key twice
God, just jump right into it, just fucking suicide. Just right into it
FUCK. ME
Fuck. Fuck
Why do I have to hit the fucking R key? Like I- I don't get it
Fucking shift key, it does everything else!
Oh my gOD NO!
It does everything else and by everything I mean it jumps which is the only fucking thing you do in this game
Okay you can't fucking get up there
But every time you die, nope, hit that fucking R key just to piss you off
You gotta move your fucking hand and- and move it across the fucking keyboard to hit it
You can't get up there. You can't get up there
It's impossible
No! No that was-! No- IT IS FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE
Oh my god, no!
ON THE FUCKING CLOUDS NOT IN BETWEEN
Ohh my goood
Holy fuck, you gotta go around- NO!
You gotta go round...You- you can't go up top. It's like the first fucking room all over again
I've done two fucking rooms and they've fucked my mouth in both
Oh my god he hit the fucking side of the spike? He hit the fucking side of it?
Get. The fuck up there you stupid asshole
Thank yo- OH MY GO-
WHAT THE SHIT
[Frustrated noises]
Dude, I hate the fucking cloud because it went up but I FELL THROUGH IT
LOSE SOME FUCKING WEIGHT TUBS
He won't fucking get up there you stupid shit!
No wonder you wanna be the guy cause you fucking suck!
Where the stupid trap? Yeah, fuck you! FUCK YOU
Thank fuckin christ
Fucking invisible platforms or some shit?
Yup! Yup!
This is gonna be fuckin great
That's it. I swear to god- I swear to god. That is it
NO! NO! NO!
HOLY FUCK INDIANA JONES DIDN'T HAVE THIS PROBLEM IN THE LAST CRUSADE
HE DIDN'T FUCKING WALK ON THE BRIDGE AND GO WHAATT
FUCKIN BRIDGE DISAPPEARED I DON'T KNOW. THAT'S BULLSHIT. IT'S SUPPOSED TO FUCKING BE THERE
GAME OVER? FUCK YOU