[intro music]
Hello!
This is my face when I wake up in the morning.
And my hair - my hair does some amazing things while I'm asleep at night.
So, as I am a, a "youtuber" and everything, I thought I'd do a um, a little "Get Ready
With Me" video.
Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about “normality”.
I mean, what is “normal”, anyway?
How do we expect that a “normal” 25-year-old woman gets ready in the morning?
And why is so common to feel ashamed or even to try to hide things that aren’t “normal”
about yourself?
Example.
These are the medications that I take every single day to keep me alive.
Yes, literally alive.
Look at this pretty pastel pink pill.
And normally I feel ashamed about anybody, even my close friends, my family, having to
see that part of my life.
And I’ve hidden it for years.
And why?
Well, because taking that many pills a day makes me feel like I’m 80 years old, because
that’s the only other people I’ve ever seen taking that many pills a day.
When I'm out at a restaurant at night I always feel like I have to hide them under the table,
like I'm doing something... illicit with the prescribed pills that I've been given.
Again - so that I don't die.
But – why is this something that I feel so ashamed about?
I can’t be the only person.
And that brings me back to my question at the beginning:
What is normality, anyway?
Oooh - I make some really good faces when I'm putting on makeup.
You get up in the morning, you have a shower, maybe you put on your makeup if you’re so
inclined, you get dressed, and you head off to work.
That’s normal, right?
You see the doctor maybe, you know, once a year for a check up, you eat healthy and you
go to the gym and you’re set.
That sounds like the life of a normal 25-year-old woman.
Here's a good shot up my nose, by the way.
And you know, some days, maybe even most days, you can hide the things that help you.
You don't stand out.
You can look just like anybody else.
You don't have to worry about being scrutinised and stared at every time you just wanna go
up to the shops.
You wanna look normal.
Right?
...And his isn’t normal - is it?
And if you haven’t been paying close attention to my videos, then you are probably feeling
a little bit uncomfortable right now.
I sure am feeling uncomfortable, sharing this aspect of my life with... hundreds of thousands
of people.
But WHY?
On an average day, I can walk perhaps a few hundred metres unaided.
And having these mobility limitations at the age of 25 has caused me a lot of fear and
shame and anxiety.
What assumptions will people immediately make about me, based on this one small characteristic
about myself?
Will a sick person be all they see?
Will this become my defining characteristic?
I think that a major reason that we feel ashamed of aspects of our lives that don’t seem
“normal” is because often we don’t see them represented anywhere else.
I’m 25, and I’m chronically ill, I'm mentally ill and I'm physically disabled.
But do you know how many movies or tv shows I’ve seen where the 25 year old’s have
a life anything like mine, that isn't portrayed as a tragedy?
0.
So I know some of you are thinking right now: Oh my god, what happened, Annika?!
And the answer to that is: Literally nothing.
I'm exactly the same as I've been the entire time you've known me, Youtube.
All that's changed is what I’ve now chosen to show you about my life.
Because this is how I get ready in the mornings, and this is my normal.
And in contrast to the representation of disabled people on television or in movies as tragic
figures, I don't hate my normal.
It's - it's just my life!
And those extra things that I do in the morning - Taking medications;
- Putting on compression braces to help my pain;
- Using a shower chair so I don’t faint and can save energy;
- And also, using a wheelchair or mobility scooter;
Well, they are all just things that help me live my life to the fullest.
They aren’t something that I need to hide, or be ashamed of.
So anyway, the whole point of this video is, I wanted to say to anyone else who’s going
through something like this, a chronic, physical or a mental illness, or if you know or care
for someone who is going through something like this: YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
And you know what - my illnesses and my disability means I have to take things a lot more slowly.
I have to ask for help.
I have days where I'm very much not okay.
And that's okay.
Since I was diagnosed with a life-threatening illness called Takayasu’s Arteritis 6 years
ago, it’s been the hardest 6 years of my life, but it's also been the best 6 years
of my life as well.
Because my illnesses and disabilities aren't who I am, they are just one small aspect of
what I consider to be a very lucky and privileged life.
I’ve learned to live with this new body.
A body that’s constantly changing and becoming different and having highs and lows.
I’ve learned to live a “new normal”.
And by the way, shout out to Hank Green, I first heard the term "new normal" in his video
about this topic, he also lives with a chronic illness and I highly recommend his video on
the topic that I'll pop in the description, after you watch this one.
So - what is normal?
Well, it's different for everyone!
My normal is making sure I eat a decent-sized breakfast every morning so that I can take
my medications.
My normal is taking the antidepressants and pain medications that help me to function.
My normal is asking for help to do basic chores around the house.
My normal is doing an hour of rehabilitation every single morning so I can walk and move
a little bit.
My normal is near-weekly doctors appointments.
My normal is sometimes not getting out of bed for a couple of days.
My normal is sometimes having to have a lie-down in the middle of a supermarket because I've
suddenly gotten SUPER dizzy.
My normal is doing things more slowly than my peers.
[plane noise]
My normal is having to use mobility aids on a bad pain or fatigue or dizziness day so
that I can leave the house.
Hashtag: #babewithamobilityaid.
My normal is sometimes, not being okay, but being okay with not being okay.
And look.
Living with a disability, a chronic illness, a mental illness – it is tough.
And if you live with one, or you are a carer for someone with one, then you’ll know,
you will have good days and you will have really, really bad days as well.
And it is tough, but hey: We are tougher!
We can still kick ass!
We still have options.
We can still do whatever we put our minds to, no matter how small those things might
seem.
So, to all my sick, chronically ill, mentally ill and physically disabled friends – I
hope this was a more relatable Get Ready With Me than you’ve ever seen before.
And to my able-bodied friends, if you're not sick, then I hope this was informative, and
I hope it helps to give you a good reason why you should never judge a book by its cover.
You don’t ever know what someone else is going through just by looking at them.
Whatever YOUR normal is, you can still get out there and kick some ass.
Even if you have to kick ass a little bit more slowly than everyone else.
[wheelchair beeps loudly]
Oh - I was gunna do a really cool, um, drive away.
But... my wheelchair is disagreeing with me.
Hang on.
[wheelchair motor noise]
[Annika laughs]
[music plays]