As a parent, you get how important this is. And I think we all hope at some point
to be a better parent than our own parents were. Let's figure out how to do
that together. I promise I can help you to get there. To be a better parent than
your own parents were. And we're going to start in a place that might surprise you.
We need to acknowledge that your parents did the best that they know how to do
with the resources that they have. I believe this is true of all parents. Now,
there are some who are exceptions to that rule. But the vast majority of
parents out there including you are doing the best that they know how to do
with the resources that they currently have. I've also thought recently, "Why were
my parents my parents? And why am I my kids parent?" I have no idea other than
that's the chronological order that we all showed up here on earth. My parents
got here before I did. Maybe if I had showed up before they did, I'd be their
parents. Who knows? But here's the thing. We're all right in the middle of a long
string of people who really don't know what they're doing. And we're all doing
the best that we know how to do. This is a key for you because I know you judge
yourself sometimes as parent, don't you? Yeah, you do. I do too. It's a normal thing
that we do. Our judgments tend to be fairly harsh. And sometimes we hold
ourselves to a standard that is unrealistic. So, I want to get really
realistic about that with you here today. You are doing the best job you know how
to do. And your parents did the same thing. So, let's practice gratitude and
forgiveness. If you're carrying grievances about how your parents
handled things when you were little then probably you're not yet in
the ideal position to show up as the kind, benevolent, generous, loving parent
that you are because of the issues that you're carrying over from them.
We all do what we've been programmed to do. And
your parents programmed you at an early age to understand things a certain way.
They programmed you with a certain language. This is what I mean by
programming. It's not that you chose to speak this language. It's that your
parents programmed you to speak this language. And in a similar way, all we
really know going into it is what we've been programmed to do. Now,
can we change our programming? Yes, we can. It takes some practice. It's probably
going to take some coaching and some education. But we can't do it. So before
we move on to that step, let's just pause for a moment. Experience some gratitude,
enact some forgiveness for whatever's happened in the past. Realized that your
parents did the best that they knew how to do. And then from that place, let's
notice that some things work better than other things. Okay. That's good to know.
And if we do more of what works in less of what doesn't, then we're in a good
position to actually upgrade the programming. And maybe we can hand on to
our own kids something that's more healthy than what we're even doing. That
would be awesome. Then each successive generation gains
and benefits from the one that came before. We can do that too. From that
mental place of forgiveness and gratitude, we can move on let's step 2.
Get some education. We live in the information age. The fact that you're
here on YouTube shows that you are aware of that and you're seeking information
that can help you to have a better body of knowledge
to move forward with your job as parent. Be very patient with yourself as you're
learning new skills and how to apply principles in a way that is more
effective. Remember, we're trying to overcome years of programming. And
changing the program can be tough but it is absolutely possible. So stick with it.
Be patient and tolerant with yourself and get all of the information and
education that you possibly can to put yourself in position to do this at a
higher level. While we're on that topic, take care of your team. If you are in a
family that has 2 parents, you're very fortunate. Consider yourself blessed and
work together with your parenting partner to be as unified as you can. You
can do this educational process together and align with each other in the
interest of your children. If you're a single parent, you still have a team.
Reach out to those who can support and encourage you along the path. I'm on your
team. I'm so grateful to be on your team too.
Thank you for being here. Spend some time in the positive parenting playlist.
Connect to the Parenting Power-Up to get some additional tools and resources. I'll
remind you about that in the outro after the video. Express appreciation for those
who are on your team and helping you to be the parent that's better than your
own. As we wrap up this video, I have to go there. You know, if you've known me
very long. What your job as a parent? To love them no matter what and even if. If
you're doing that, you're being an awesome parent. There's all kinds of
skills and strategies that we can work on together.
That's fine. Loving your children is your primary job, own it. Own it! Embrace it. Be
there for them. And enjoy the journey. Because you know what?
As a grandfather now, I know this all too well.
Kids don't keep. They grow up. They become adults, they can move on and have their
own kids. This is such a choice time of your life. Enjoy the journey. Life is to
be enjoyed not just endured. And parenting is one of the most joyful
experiences you can have. When we apply these tools and principles, you'll see
that that is absolutely true. I think even our own parents are hoping that we
can be better parents than they were. And this is one way to get there. If you
haven't had a chance yet to check out the resources at the Parenting Power-Up, I
think it's about time. There's a link right over there. And one down in the
description. Connect there and become a more confident, powerful, loving, inspiring
parent. Glad to be on your team.