There is a real power to being present. Let's dig into that today at Live On
Purpose TV. One of the more influential books that I've read in the past year is
The Power Of Now by Eckhart Tolle. This book illustrates the power of something
that I teach often in my practice called metacognition. You might remember that
metacognition means thinking about thinking. Thinking about thinking or
metacognition is a really important skill to develop. As we go to that level,
it creates a little space. And in that space is where choice exists. I'm
inviting you today to think about your thinking a little bit as we take a look
at this concept of now or present. In the English language, the word present has at
least 3 meanings. It means here in this place. It means now. In this time. And
it means gift because you can give someone a present and that's a gift,
right? I think it is a gift to remain present to be here and to be now. Let's
take a look at the psychological implications of that. When we get pulled
out of the present problems start to happen. Think about it. Right now. Right
now in this moment, in this place. Is anything lacking? Isn't that an
interesting question? Because right now you have enough. Enough everything.
Honestly, I asked one of my clients this. "In this moment, is anything lacking?" And
he said, "Well, I don't have enough money." "Really? You don't have enough money for
right now. This moment?" "Well, I have pay my mortgage." "Yeah, but not right now,
right? That's coming up soon but it's not right now. In fact, right now in this
moment, you don't even need money. Right now,
do you?" Isn't that interesting? When you think about your thinking, check it out.
You get sucked into the future and you start to worry about, "I'm not going to have
enough." When it's time to pay my bills? Do you have enough food? What if you're
hungry? You know what? Even if you're hungry, you're okay right now. But you're
a little concerned that in the future, if you don't eat soon, you're going to be in
trouble. What if you're in pain? Same thing. Okay, I can tolerate it right now.
I'm good right now. But I'm afraid that if the pain doesn't
end then I'm going to be in trouble in the future. When our mind gets sucked into
the future, we can experience anxiety or fear or worry. That's all about the
future. Well, what about the other direction? What about the past? When we
start to focus on the past, we can feel guilt, shame, remorse, depression. "Oh, I did
that thing or that thing didn't turn out the way I wanted it to." Right now is good.
But if we get sucked into the past, that's where we are vulnerable for
depression or guilt or shame. Anxiety lives over here in the future,
depression lives over here in the past. Right now is good. This is the power of
the present. So what? How do we apply this to experiencing more joy right now in
our lives? I think it has to do with practicing being fully present. Be in the
here and now no matter what you're doing. What might that look like?
What if you're mowing the lawn, okay? Some household chore or yorking in your yard.
What if you're mowing the lawn? Be fully present. You know what there's some
research that shows that when people get sucked into emotional turmoil,
whether that's anxiety or that's depression, it's because they're not here
and now. Their mind has gone somewhere else in the past or in the future.
Interesting that the research is supporting this now. You know this from
your own experience. It's true. So while you're mowing the lawn, instead of
wishing that you were somewhere else doing something else. Remain fully
present. Smell the smells that are there. Feel the feelings that are associated
with it. Hear the sounds that are here and now. Be fully present. What if you're
washing the dishes? Be present washing the dishes.
Keep your mind here, keep it now. Enjoy... I love that word because it includes the
word joy inside of it. Enjoy the present the here and the now.
Whatever it is that you're doing here and now. I tell you what? If you practice
this while you're mowing the lawn while you're doing the dishes while you're
vacuuming the floor, whatever mundane thing that you're doing, you'd be fully
present. Why? Because you're going to enjoy your life more. Here's an even more
important thing. It changes your relationships. As you practice being
fully present, now let's apply that to being fully present with your spouse.
Being here, being now in that key relationship that you have. What a gift!
Vicki and I were out at a restaurant recently and it was so fascinating to us
as we were having a conversation and connecting with each other and we got
onto this topic because we're talking about being present and we started to
look around us at the other people in the restaurant. And I can't even tell you
how many people were on their device on their
cellphone or their mobile device texting or scrolling or looking something up.
They're not here, they're here. And the person that they're with there's maybe
on their device too and neither one is fully present. What if you could connect
right here face to face, nose to nose, eye to eye to see each other, to be fully
present. What kind of a gift would that be? What if you could be fully present
with your children? Wow! Having the experience that I do in child
psychology, I can think of few things that would be a greater gift to a child
than a parent who is fully present with them. Here, now. Connected in the way that
we've been talking about. Be fully present. This will power up all of your
relationships. It will increase your joy, your productivity will increase. You're
far less vulnerable for things like anxiety and depression because you're
here and now. And right now in the present, things are good. With all of the
practical advice on this channel, it's fun to get philosophical once in a while.
I'm glad that you joined me here today. I hope you found that to be helpful. If you
did, would you please make sure that you have subscribed to this channel? Click
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