- ♪ Old McDonald had a farm ♪
(crowd chants E-I-E-I-O)
♪ Old McDonald had a farm ♪
♪ You coming at M, but you rap like a mom ♪
♪ Why you always dressing like a genie? ♪
♪ Will Smith did that that's his job ♪
- All right. - Yo.
- Okay. - B. Simone.
- Oh, wait, wait. - B. Simone.
- Hold on, okay. - Yo.
♪ You as hairy as a man ♪
♪ The way you lookin' you could be your own boyfriend ♪
- ♪ You made a song about a calendar, you think you the bomb ♪
♪ Hey, yo, Nick, chicken heads, they belong on the farm ♪
(crowd cheers)
- ♪ Doja Cat, here's something you won't believe ♪
♪ I went backstage and found the rest of your weave ♪
♪ And I got Lou ♪
♪ If she don't want to use it, boy, ♪
♪ Here, put it on your boots ♪
(crowd laughs) - Kiss my ass.
- ♪ D, (beep), every time that I see you I say, damn ♪
♪ You look like the blue monster from Space Jam. ♪
- Oh, Mars Stars, the most ugly one.
- Aight, check this out, look-
♪ Space Jam, now that ain't white, ♪
♪ That's why you look like a fake ass Gucci wife ♪
- Gucci wife fine.
- But don't she look like the same version?
- DJ, can you cut the beat for me?
You know I can't catch the beat.
Ah, Chico.
Hi.
♪ Chico, I know why you slow ♪
♪ Because your head is shaped like an Idaho potato. ♪
(crowd laughs)
- I had to cut the beat for that?
- Yeah. (music resumes)
- That was very funny.
Hey, come here, baby.
Hey.
♪ Yeah, I'm Chico Bean, and I'm known to get cash ♪
♪ I got an Idaho potato, you got them stuffed in your ass. ♪
(crowd cheers)
- ♪ Uh, clap, clap, clap, clap ♪
♪ How your baby mama ♪
♪ The biggest thing you ever had happen, ♪
I thought to judge talent, you had to have talent, look,
♪ You be on live TV, looking like Jafar from Aladdin, ♪
♪ How you let a ballet dancer take your princess Jasmine? ♪
(crowd groans)
- Okay.
That was good.
♪ He said some wild (beep) like my blood was about to boil ♪
♪ Said he 24K, more like aluminum foil, ♪
♪ But you know, Ima keep rhyming every day, ♪
♪ Because I get so paid, I ain't scared to say ♪
♪ That I thought I had already battled Young MA. ♪
(crowd laughs)
- Hold up, Nick, Nick, Nick talking about.
come here real quick, you.
- Hold up Nick, don't do that.
- Come here real quick, hey, listen.
I'm gonna let you know like this.
♪ Hey 24K, man you need to hit the highway ♪
♪ Cause you got the same braids as Felicia off of Friday. ♪
(crowd laughs)
- Bye, Felicia!
- Look, look, nah, nah, stay right there, stay right there.
♪ Look, this is my court ♪
♪ I'm the judge, you get no pardon, ♪
♪ Why you look like the most bootleg ♪
♪ Version of James Harden? ♪
- Black Squad step up, Red Squad step up.
DJ D-Wrek,
drop the beat. (hip hop beat plays)
♪ Hey, hey come on, hey, where are you at Atlanta? ♪
All right I got it.
♪ Yo Chance, the whole episode, ♪
♪ Dawg, I've been peeping you ♪
♪ Yachty told me, ♪
♪ Let me play with these (beep) like peekaboo ♪
♪ I must let you know, off the top, I'm eeking you, ♪
♪ I don't know, your fiance don't know if she keeping you ♪
♪ Because she want a real man ♪
♪ Show what a freak could do ♪ ♪ Putting it off the top, ♪
♪ Now now I'm speaking booth ♪
♪ And Ima go to the right, why you laughing? ♪
♪ You got something for me in here tonight? ♪
♪ With them bogus ass jeans, ♪
♪ Them bogus ass shoes ♪
♪ And everybody know you got bogus ass dance moves ♪
♪ And he's still over here, cheesin' ♪
♪ I know this is the red squad's season. ♪
- Yo!
- ♪ Look, my (beep) rockin' him some barrettes ♪
♪ Wild'N hairstyle, I know you got some regrets ♪
♪ Got on some glasses, can't you see? ♪
♪ You know you only wear them bitches when you read ♪
♪ Little ass beard, your little ass weird, ♪
♪ What type of Atlanta is this? ♪
♪ The Donald Glover version? ♪
♪ Cause this (beep) is extra weird. ♪
- I love Atlanta, it's a different kind of Atlanta-
- I knew you were talking about me.
DC, you don't want any.
Get yo skinny ass over here too.
- ♪ Hold up, stop, I'm Cupid, ♪
♪ You said don't shoot, but he really don't like your music ♪
(crowd laughs)
- ♪ Yo, they call me Hitman Holla, I keep a hammer ♪
♪ I'm from St. Louis, ♪ ♪ You know it's country grammar ♪
♪ I got a blam, for you ♪
♪ I bet these keys on your neck ♪
♪ Open up every waffle house in Atlanta ♪
(crowd laughs)
- ♪ All right, I'm kind of big, so Ima slow up ♪
♪ Ima speak tracks, you know what? ♪
♪ You need to slow up ♪
♪ Your earrings, your teeth are small ♪
♪ (Beep) will you grow up? ♪
- Hey Chance. - Come on, Chance.
- Hey, boo.
♪ Chance you the man and they don't compare ♪
♪ You do good for the community and you aint scared ♪
♪ You give away money, so I know you care ♪
♪ Give some to DC, TRL went off air. ♪
- Ooh!
DJ D-Wrek, drop the beat.
(hip hop beat plays)
Clap your hands, yo, clap your hands, yo.
Ima go first.
The great Chance out here.
We got to do it like this, Chance.
♪ You want to talk about my jeans ♪
♪ With them skinny ass pants ♪
♪ Yo, these ain't Biggie, Ima give you one more chance. ♪
- Okay, DJ D-Wrek, you gonna give him a bell,
and I like that, but seriously,
you and Spike Lee can never come back to Chi-raq.
(crowd cheers)
- ♪ Man you say I can't come to Chicago? ♪
♪ Man, you should keep that ♪
♪ You ain't got no bars ♪
♪ I guess that's why they gave you a Kit-Kat. ♪
(crowd ohs)
- That's cool.
♪ See this right here is a Kit-Kat ♪
♪ You call that a rap snack ♪
♪ I heard you was at Office Depot selling backpacks. ♪
- I was.
- ♪ Who you sent, Hitman? ♪
♪ Rapping bout guns, like you could relate with me. ♪
♪ Boy, I pull his gun, ♪
♪ All the girls passing out like I got Drake with me. ♪
♪ You don't bust guns. ♪
♪ You keep your hands by the nine, like 8:50. ♪
♪ You want to fight? ♪
♪ Exactly ♪
♪ That ain't a chance the rapper want to take with me ♪
- ♪ You talking about guns to me? ♪
♪ You know your man's with it. ♪
♪ You pull out one, I'll pull out one, let's dance with it. ♪
♪ I pull out a hammer ♪
♪ And pistol whip you on the top of your head with the tray ♪
♪ They think it's chance fitted. ♪
♪ It's going to be so many dread heads in your lobby ♪
♪ The cops gonna think Chance did it ♪
- (Beep) that.
(Beep) that.
♪ Why are (beep) keep using my name ♪
♪ As they metaphor for the joke, I want to know the answer. ♪
♪ And who the (beep) are you? ♪
♪ You look like Big Krit with cancer, done with you ♪
I'm going to talk about you.
♪ He got on the shoes like he blood, ♪
♪ But he been repping the Cs, ♪
♪ You look like Tory Lanez ♪
♪ With that Benjamin button disease. ♪
- Oh, okay, that was good, Chance.
- ♪ And, and it's, and it's bogus cause I (beep) with DC ♪
♪ That's one hell of a guy, ♪
♪ But he look like somebody, in the middle of his forehead, ♪
♪ Swatted a fly, (beep) is wrong with you? ♪
- ♪ Hold up, Chance The Rapper, Ima stop you right there ♪
♪ Because you, my man, Black. ♪
♪ But that last rap ♪
♪ Was worse than my performance in Chi-raq. ♪
(crowd cheers)
- But nobody's seen it.
Did he really mean it?
- ♪ Yo, I took him to red hook, he wasn't no chump ♪
♪ They would (beep) with him, cause his music do pump ♪
♪ But Ima tell y'all a secret, this ain't what you want ♪
♪ On some real (beep), he voted for Trump. ♪
(crowd groans)
- ♪ Hey, yo, hey, yo, hey, yo, hold up. ♪
♪ Let me make one thing clear ♪
♪ One of my songs sold 7 million copies this year ♪
♪ Add that up, what do we have there? ♪
♪ More singles sold than his whole career ♪
- Hold on.
See, I wasn't even gonna go there.
I was trying to be nice.
♪ Wasn't even go there, but now I've got to let you have it. ♪
♪ How do you lose your (beep) to 21 Savage? ♪
(crowd cheers and claps)
- Come here, Canadian boy. - You want some of this?
- Let's get some of this real quick.
- ♪ Yo, you'd have to be crazy to touch this chick ♪
♪ I wouldn't even bang you with Usher's (beep). ♪
- All right, Sherome.
♪ Well, that's funny you think you could smash? ♪
♪ I'd have to find your dick with a magnifying glass. ♪
- ♪ With a magnifying glass, it'd still catch a disease ♪
♪ You learned your STDs before your ABCs ♪
(crowd cheers)
- ♪ Hey D-Wrek, who let this dude in the Wild Style? ♪
♪ Somebody take B Rabbit back to 8 Mile. ♪
- ♪ Hey, that was nice, man, you spit on that track, ♪
♪ I don't care how much Henny you drink, ♪
♪ You still ain't black, you still ain't black. ♪
(crowd cheering and clapping)
- DJ D-Wrek,
drop the beat.
(hip hop beat plays)
♪ Uh, hey, hey, hey. ♪
Oh, Durk already stepping up. - Facts.
- Aight, huh, aight, aight.
♪ Now, usually in the battle Durk, you would get this work, ♪
♪ But really all I want to see is Bernice twerk, ♪
♪ Cause everybody knows that I'm a hell of a flirt ♪
♪ Girl, you could get this ring ♪
♪ Instead of that Wild'N Out shirt. ♪
- Boo.
- Did you just boo my proposal?
- Stop the beat, stop the beat.
- Oh, you gonna cut the beat on me?
- How many of y'all seen that Chi-raq movie,
make some noise.
(crowd cheers)
- Spike Lee directed that (beep).
- ♪ Hey, y'all see this 300 ring, right here? ♪
♪ I should have gave yo ass the right piece ♪
♪ I don't know if I should smack the (beep) out of you ♪
♪ Or I should smack the (beep) out of Spike Lee ♪
- Probably Spike, probably Spike.
Bring the beat back. (beat resumes)
- I got Durk and Bernice, real quick.
♪ Okay, listen, check it out ♪
♪ I'm like Durk, you must feel stupid ♪
♪ You got a Jay-Z face with Lil Pump music ♪
♪ And Bernice how much plastic is under there? ♪
♪ When you die, ♪
♪ They're going to donate your body to Tupperware ♪
(crowd claps)
- ♪ Justina, yo ♪
♪ You had a McDonald's commercial, ♪
♪ For that, I'll give you a handshakes, ♪
♪ But you really should be reppin' the House of Pancakes. ♪
- Oh he's, he's saying my ass flat.
♪ Listen Tim, now you talking real reckless ♪
♪ You ain't complain when you ate pancakes for breakfast ♪
♪ To say that, you really had some balls ♪
♪ I sent your plate back because the sausage too small ♪
(crowd claps and cheers)
- Sending it back to the kitchen!
(hip hop beat plays)
- ♪ Uh, come on, clap your hands, y'all ♪
♪ Clap your hands y'all, clap your hands y'all ♪
♪ Ying yang on my team ♪
♪ We know what that's a factor ♪
♪ Baby, we know you was a trapper ♪
♪ Now a singer, now it's the mass rapper ♪
♪ And Bobby, you just an out of work actor ♪
- My turn, my turn, my turn. - Ah, (beep).
- ♪ Nick I must admit, I know you been in your bag ♪
♪ But that (beep) you did with Em, ♪
♪ Was worser than trash. ♪
- Aight, aight, aight.
♪ That Eminem (beep) dawg, ♪
♪ I'm telling you, I never lost, ♪
♪ But Ima I tell you now, ♪
♪ It look like you dripping too soft ♪
- Let me get Jas and Baby real quick.
♪ Look, okay, vending machine pants, I'm pushing it out. ♪
♪ I bet if I press a button, your whole (beep) come out ♪
♪ And Baby, if you looking for a baddie ♪
♪ I know you Lil Baby, but I'm trying to call you daddy. ♪
- Hey Lil Baby, Lil baby.
No, no, no, not you, the real little baby, come here.
- ♪ Hey it's a fact that you're all sweet ♪
♪ This is the first baby I seen ♪
♪ That put his own self in his car seat ♪
(crowd laughs)
- Aight, come here Clips, cause you set me up.
Nah, you set me up.
Aight, look.
♪ I bet your fat ass probably high, ♪
♪ Starbursts up your sleeve ♪
♪ Why is he here, shouldn't he be on maternity leave? ♪
Come here, Michael Blackson.
Bring your black ass here too, come here.
♪ Now, Mike, I know you get money ♪
♪ So I ain't mad at you ♪
♪ Click your heels three times ♪
♪ You'll be back in Africa ♪
♪ You already know, with the flow I kill it, ♪
♪ You are dressed like ♪
♪ The last Starburst left in the village. ♪
(crowd cheers)
- ♪ Hey, yo, Saint Jhn, you already lost this (beep) ♪
♪ What kind of gangster walks around with some frosted tips? ♪
♪ Now, I know you started soft ♪
♪ You look like Offset if Cardi B. Ever cut him off. ♪
- Ooh, talk your (beep), Justina.
- ♪ They told me Ima do this, ♪
♪ I ain't want to be in a rush ♪
♪ I got a call on the phone ♪
♪ They told me I bet her hush ♪
♪ I said, hold up I might take a drink, ♪
♪ You know that I'm a lush, ♪
♪ But who knew that Rosa Parks made it off the bus? ♪
- Oh, damn, he start firing.
Right now anybody get hit.
She wasn't bothering nobody.
Just an innocent bystander.
- Hey, hey.
Conceited, step up here.
Me and miles, me and miles,
we just got one question to ask you.
You ready?
♪ Look, we know that little kids adore you. ♪
♪ But how am I 15 and I got a mustache before you? ♪
(crowd laughs)