- [Kelly] Hello! So baby number three is on the way?
- Yeah. My wife is gonna love that intro.
- Yeah. She should be a little scared.
I always think like, because I have two,
and I'm outnumbered because I'm single now,
but it's a different thing when you're outnumbered.
You're like, no one's there to like ...
You know, you only have so many arms.
- [Topher] Yes. Everyone says like on the first baby,
they're like, "Oh, congratulations!"
- [Kelly] Yeah.
- Then the second baby, they're like, "Congratulations."
On the third baby there's, like, a question mark at the end.
They're like, "Congratulations?"
- So where should I send the flower?
- [Topher] Yeah, it's ... But we're excited.
My wife is ...
I'll just take this moment on national television
to say how beautiful and amazing she is.
- [Kelly] Aw!
(crowd cheering)
I love that.
That's exciting, though. It is cool.
Like your family's just getting even bigger.
That's cool.
- Yeah. Check in with me in about ...
- [Kelly] Yeah. - One year.
- [Kelly] And you're gonna be like so tired.
Yeah.
It is cool though because the siblings.
Like, I have two kids,
and they literally want me to have another baby.
They get excited. They want a baby in the house.
- That's like how I wanted my parents to
get a dog so bad, and I was like,
"I will participate.
Like, I will walk the dog.
- Yeah. And then you didn't.
- [Topher] And then I did nothing.
- No.
- The whole ... I think I walked that dog one time.
- [Kelly] My daughter suckered me into that, as well.
I think she prepped me with, "You should have a baby."
And I was like, "Oh!"
- [Topher] We'll get a dog.
- And then she was like, "Or how about just a puppy?"
And I was like, "You're good."
I was like, "Okay."
So we got another one,
and she said she'd help, and she lied.
As a parent, though, are you pro, like, screen time?
Are you, like, pro that?
Or like, are you trying to, you know, steer clear of it?
- We're trying to do as little screen time as possible.
We were real, like, no screen time people.
- [Kelly] That's how we all start.
- [Topher] Yeah, exactly. That's how.
- Yeah. And then you're like, I need to pee.
- [Topher] Yeah, exactly.
- [Kelly] Watch this.
But wait, did your parents let you have screen time?
Did you watch TV?
- No, I am a product of ...
It was not zero screen time. My mom loved old movies.
- Yeah. Classics.
- [Topher] My mom, another wonderful woman
I'd love to shout out.
And she only let me watch classic movies,
which sounds like a good move, and was, ultimately,
great that I wasn't watching a lot of TV,
but I only watched old movies.
I had, like, a lot of Cary Grant, a lot of Danny Kay.
- Love!
- Yeah. But I would go into school,
and, like, I remember one time,
like, in seventh grade, I used the term "man alive"
which is like a, you know, when something bad happens,
you go "man alive" in, like, the forties.
(Kelly laughing)
- And I started to realize, like,
TV is, like, how you normalize people.
They get to know, like, what the vernacular is like now.
- [Kelly] Yeah. Yeah.
- And so, I went to boarding school when I was a teenager,
and then I watched TV for, like, three years nonstop.
- To catch up?
- [Topher] To catch up and say,
"Oh this is how people of modern day talk."
- You're right, though!
Yeah.
But you're right, though.
That is, like, how friendships ...
Like, you talk about the same thing.
You have this,
"Oh, did you see that episode when this happened?"
You're true. Yeah, that's true.
- [Topher] All the kids are saying ... Yeah.
Did you see In Living Color?
Did you see Saturday Night Live?
- [Kelly] ♪ In living color ♪
- Yeah. And I had no idea what they were talking about.
And then, and then I just, like, binged everything
that had ever been made once I was away.
- [Kelly] Okay. Well done.
- But anyway, my mom was wonderful. I'm glad she did it.
- I think she had great taste is what that is.
Yeah.
- Actually I didn't tell you.
This is, uh ...
My mom told me that Saltines were cookies.
Which was smart.
- Were you poor?
Because I feel like my mom did that.
- [Topher] Nope!
- [Kelly] Oh. Because I was like,
"I feel like my mom did that."
And we used to do this.
It was like poor man's dessert,
and you'd have, like, a little butter and
like, a marshmallow, and you'd put it in the microwave,
and it was like dessert.
(Topher and crowd laughing)
Yeah.
- No, my mom just thought, like ...
I mean she had all the right ideas
She was like, "Let's keep these kids healthy."
And so she ... I'd go, "Can I have a cookie please?"
And she give me a Saltine. I'd say, "Yum!"
And then ...
(Kelly laughing)
And then when I was, like, six or something,
I went on my first sleepover to a kid's house,
and this kid was like, "That's not a cookie.
This is a cookie." And it was, like an Oreo,
And I was like, "What is that?"
And she had to come pick me up because I couldn't sleep.
Like had so much sugar in my ...
I ate like the whole thing of Oreos.
- [Kelly] Because it's so bad. Yeah.
But did your mom make you take classes or anything?
Like, you know, like, sports or music or anything?
- Well, this was something that a lot
of kids did at this school I grew up at in Connecticut.
There's, like, a cotillion, like, ballroom dancing class.
- You definitely weren't poor. Because nope.
No poor people even know what cotillion is.
I still don't.
- You're not wrong, Kelly.
But it wasn't my thing, just to let you know.
Like, I wasn't into it,
But it was the only thing that boys and girls could do
in that town together.
It was ... I don't know, some guys showed up ...
- [Kelly] What, were you in the movie Footloose?
Like, wait, what?
- No, no. This was a pro-dance thing.
But sadly, it was just, like, ballroom dancing.
- [Kelly] Oh, that's cool!
- It was not cool, but it was ... it was ...
Again, I'd seen in these movies I watched growing up,
So I thought, "Oh, that'll be cool."
And then I was so bad at it, I kind of ...
There was a kid who - on national television,
I will call Frank, but that's not his name,
and you know who you are, Frank -
who, like, made fun of me a lot
because I didn't get the ballroom dancing steps right
or whatever.
I still think I was cooler than him,
but he was technically much more popular than I was.
But then when I started acting, I guess I did one movie,
and then my second film was Mona Lisa Smile,
if anyone remembers that.
- [Kelly] Oh my gosh! I love that one.
- And I have to dance with Julia Roberts in this movie.
- [Kelly] Damn!
- And so they said like,
"Will you, like, before filming starts?"
And I was already just terrified to meet her.
They were like, "Will you come do a ballroom dancing class
with Julia Roberts?"
And I was like, "This is my shot."
I was like, "Everything I learned in that ..."
Oh! here we are dancing.
It's me and my ...
- [Kelly] Look at your little baby face!
- [Topher] Yeah. Yeah.
I was so scared.
I stepped on her toes, like, a couple times,
and she was very cool about it.
And then when we did it on the day,
the whole cast was also dancing on the dance floor.
And again, I won't use his name, but I told her this story,
and Julia Roberts came up to me at the end after the scene,
and she high fived me and she goes, "That was for Frank."
And I was like ...
- [Kelly] Ah! We can't stand Frank, whoever you are.
- Frank, you know who you are!
- [Kelly] Yeah. Bullying isn't cool.
That was a look at season three of your show,
Home Economics.
You can see it Wednesdays on ABC.
So you asked to show that clip, right?
That was the clip you wanted to show, right?
- Yes. Because that episode, our fourth episode,
takes place in 2009.
That might explain why we looked ...
- [Kelly] Awesome.
- Awesome.
- That ... the swing. That was amazing.
- [Topher] Yeah, and they put so much product in my hair
the hair lady was like,
"Don't stand next to any open flames."
But we're trying to clear some Kelly Clarkson, 2009.
Don't worry, I won't make you agree to anything.
- I know. I'm like, "Well, I'll agree."
What is it?
- That's the album, right?
That's the ... what is that?
- [Kelly] Yeah, 2009 was ... what was that?
- What was that? My Life Would Suck Without You.
- [Kelly] Yeah, that All I Wanted.
Ooo, I should know this. Yep! Ooo.
I don't listen to myself.
- [Topher] That's right. Yeah. That would be weird.
- Yeah. That would be weird
if I'm just, like, jamming to myself.
But I think I listened to it too much.
But that ... I'll get it cleared.
- [Topher] Great. - Yeah.
- All right. Great. You heard it. You're it here.
- [Kelly] You heard it here.
Clearing songs is hard!
Do you know how many songs I do on this show?
Clearing songs can be difficult.
- Oh, yeah. Half the work.
- Yeah.
- After I came last time,
I had such a great time on your show,
and Wilmer Valderrama had just been on before me,
and we were talking about it,
and we can't believe that we weren't hanging out with you.
Like, I feel like 2009 was ... or mid-2000s,
like I can't believe we never crossed path,
and what I said to him, I was like,
"I think we would've, like, hung out with her."
- We totally would've hung out.
Here's the thing about to know about me,
I am an extrovert, but also secretly an introvert.
- That just means you're an introvert.
- [Kelly] No, I know, but I am an extrovert.
It's like, once I get to know someone,
then I'm like this all the time.
I think on camera I'm even more outgoing
than I am in life.
- I think that's a lot of actors that I meet.
- Well, I'm not an actor, but musicians are like that, too.
- What was the ... when was the ...
You're singing in the rain.
I was talking to your producer about this, like,
it's, like, raining indoors, and you're singing at like,
MTV Movie Awards.
- [Kelly] Hazel Eyes ... no.
- But no, it's like a ...
- Oh, Since U Been Gone!
- [Topher] Yeah, but when was that?
- [Kelly] That was the VMAs.
- [Topher] That's, like, the greatest performance
of that time.
That's up there, for me, with, like, Prince Super Bowl.
Sorry, I don't mean to ...
(crowd cheering)
- Have a good one.
What?
- Seriously that is ... that's a great performance. Right?
- Okay, but you don't know this.
- I mean, you can even admit that was a great performance.
- Well, no, what's so funny is,
and maybe you've done this in your career too,
when people tell you you can't do something
and then just live, you do whatever you want.
- Oh, what? They said you can't ...
- I wasn't supposed to be a part of the rain.
They were like, "Oh no, you're not allowed to do that."
I don't know if it was liability or whatever,
but then it was like, I didn't tell them,
so nobody was held accountable,
only myself, but I just went in the rain anyway
because I was like,
"This is not cool. It'd be more fun to be a part."
- [Topher] That moment was ...
- [Kelly] It was a lot harder to sing in here, though,
but yeah.
- That moment was, like, the reality show,
and that was such a huge hit, but it was like,
is it gonna happen?
And that was the moment where it went like boop,
and then it, like, happened. Right?
- Yeah. That was ... No, it was I just did it. Yeah.
Do you have moments like that when
people tell you shouldn't do something or whatever,
and you're like, "I'm just gonna do me."
- No, now that I'm married, no more of those.
- [Kelly] No moments.
I just, I check with her.
- [Topher] Yeah.
- Actually let make a call to make sure
it's okay that I said that.
- But I am okay with saying that.
No, I love it. I love that.
So wait, your show is a comedy. I love it. It's hilarious.
But it deals with real topics, which I think is important.
Like how income equality, inequality rather, is an issue.
Is that ...
- [Topher] Oh, it's a huge issue,
and it's amazing to me
one: that there aren't that many shows about that
when that's such a big deal to all of us.
- But I love when you take an important topic,
and then you add humor.
- Oh yeah. It's hard.
I mean, the writer's job is hard,
but it's based on Mike Colton, who runs the show
with John Aboud. They're like a writing team.
But Mike, it's based on his life,
So anything that we're doing on the show ...
- Wow.
- [Topher] Has been his life,
except for something that happens.
This is maybe a spoiler,
but later in the season we find out we have another sibling.
- Oh!
- [Topher] And it's, like, a really interesting way
into this plot, but it's my favorite thing of this.
I can't tell you who it is or what the ...
but it's like these writers are so good on this show,
and it's so inventive, and it's so ...
another serious situation that is, like,
done with a lot of humor.
I just ... I love it. I love being with the cast.
It's such a fun show
- [Kelly] You know, and I love that you point that out.
You're such a great human, too, because a lot of people
that come here don't always mention the writers,
and the writers are so important for those plots, those
storylines.
- They're the whole thing.
- [Kelly] Well they're not the whole thing.
You have to be able to implement ...
- [Topher] They are, actually.
- [Kelly] What's happening.
- They're way more than the actor. Let's say that.
- No, I don't think that, but I just think it's amazing,
though, that when you work with incredible writers,
and you're inspired by what they're doing,
and it makes your job more exciting. Right?
That same thing as a singer.
(applause)
- Yeah. No, agreed. Agreed. Yeah.
- [Kelly] Yeah. That's cool.
I love when people come up with great storylines.
That's awesome.
Well, there's this photo that exists
from the very early days of That 70s Show.
Do you remember this?
- [Topher] Yeah. Okay. So why don't you ...
- [Kelly] How does a man that skinny
eating that many burger?
Like, I'm just like, what kind of ...
What kind of medicine are you on?
- Your producer, your great producer Craig,
who is in charge of my segment,
was my first interview of all time.
That's from People's 40 Fabulous Faces of something.
I don't know.
But like ...
- [Kelly] He did that?
- [Topher] He didn't take the pictures.
- [Kelly] Okay.
- [Topher] But I didn't know anything.
I can't look at his.
Here's what I ... Keep the picture up. Okay?
Here's what I want to tell Craig, by the way,
because I love him, and he's great,
but also, like no one told me I had a say, in like,
what the concept ...
Like you know that when you do a photo shoot, you say, like,
"Hey, maybe I won't be eating ..."
- [Kelly] 10 hamburgers?
- [Topher] A plate full of hamburgers.
Or like, what's the thinking behind the suit?
- [Kelly] What are we doing?
- [Topher] What are we doing here?
But I just, like, did this interview with Craig.
He was very gentle.
He was my first, and I ...
(crowd laughing)
and then when I was preparing for this segment,
I got talk to him.
- [Kelly] You are awesome.
- [Topher] I was just really, really happy to reunite
with him and like, you know ...
I mean my mom, like, you know clipped it out
and put it on my pillow when I came home.
- [Kelly] Oh!
- It was, like, a big deal for the Grace family.
- [Kelly] I love that!
I had this moment, too. I did ridiculous things.
Yeah. And you're just, like, you don't know.
You're green. Right? So you're like, "Sure."
- [Topher] I was like, "I'll do anything."
- Yeah. They got us.
- I did.
- They got us. They got both of us.
- They got us. - That's okay.
- We made it!
- Won in the end? Who won in the end?