hey guys welcome back thanks for joining me for another video if you are new to
my channel my name is Stephanie I am a life and relationship coach if you have
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upload a new video this week we are here for the fellas so fellas this is for you
this video is all about how to avoid toxic women and I think that this is
huge because I did make one a while ago about how to avoid toxic men when you
are kind of out there dating and I got a lot of flack for not making one for you
guys out there so for all of the guys that are following watching right now
this one's for you so one of the things that's really huge when you guys are out
there dating is and again just like the video for toxic men this video is also
geared towards women as well you can definitely watch this and gain some
tidbits as well but I think that there are certain things that women do that
men don't and vice versa but number one for you guys out there observe her
behavior and this is a really really important so when we are observing
someone we are seeing if this person is what we're trying to attract and being
really honest with ourselves on whether or not she is that person so whatever
she's giving you whatever she's showing you you need to match it with what is
the standard what is the woman that I'm looking to attract into my life and is
this person capable of being this woman and being really honest with yourself in
that process that is absolutely huge the next thing is asking her questions now
this is great because I think for women we'd like to be asked questions you know
how are you doing how do you feel what's going on with you you know all of those
things and two things will happen number one when you're asking her
questions she will feel like you're inquisitive and you want to know more
about her as well and this is also giving you an opportunity to see number
one when I ask her questions does she ask me questions back or is it all about
her and number two you also learning more about her so I think people don't
even realize at times how beneficial just asking questions are you know as
you start to say hey you know what are you
looking for in a relationship where do you see yourself in a few years what are
your goals do you want kids do you not want kids what type of career do you
have you know how hard do you work at your job like how you know is it a job
that requires you to work 50 hours a week when you start learning this stuff
about a person again you're gonna see is this person the person that I'm looking
to attract them to my life so if you're on a date with a woman and she's great
but she travels 90% of the time and she's always on the go traveling the
world or if she has to work 60 70 hours a week or something easy like that and
you know that you want to have dinner at five o'clock maybe your values are not
in line and maybe she's more of that go-getter achiever and wants that type
of a life and wants a partner that is flexible with her type of a schedule and
maybe you're not that person so being really honest with yourself on what you
want and who this person is again will always be beneficial to you on the
outlook side does she have her own life and I think that this is just as
important for men and it is for women we have to come into relationships being
whole and so if I don't have much of a life if I don't like my job if I don't
have any hobbies if I don't have a circle of friends and I'm just kind of
here then that may not be the healthiest person because maybe that's the type of
person that is codependent and is looking for someone to fill them up
because they haven't learned how to do that themselves
so is she excited about life does she enjoy life does she have hobbies what is
she passionate about you know someone that isn't just letting life kind of
approach them they are out there making things happen for themselves right so
does she have support in her life does she have a circle of friends doesn't
mean that she needs to be the life of the party and I have 50 million friends
but does she have a good support system in her life right now because she's
aware that she can't do everything on her own and and you're not gonna be able
to do everything and be everything for her as well so does she find support in
other areas of her life and what are those relationships look like I think
that that's really important to understand as you begin dating some
is looking at the relationships that this person has in their life and seeing
what is the dynamic you know how does she treat the people in her life is she
caring is she thoughtful is she compassionate does she have empathy how
does she treat the people in her life and also how did the people treat her I
think that that is a huge thing that a lot of people don't even really think
about the relationships that she has in her life and the friends that she has
are they abusive people are they manipulative is she aware of it does she
just let people kind of walk all over her I don't necessarily know if it's
quite frankly a deal breaker but it will show you who a person is and how they
view themselves so if you're looking for a healthy person you want to be with
someone that is able to really stand up for themselves because that shows that
they really love themselves that they know how to emotionally mentally
mentally take care of themselves and that's who you want to attract if you're
at that same level one of the sure signs of someone who are female especially who
is possibly narcissistic and really a toxic and unhealthy for you is they
gossip they take pleasure out of someone else's sufferings they're very
competitive and really all of these things stem from a severe severe
insecurity within this woman so if I get off on hurting someone if I get off on
gossiping if I get off on hearing that someone's not doing well and I'm doing
better than them that's not someone who's happy and whole by themselves
that's not a good solid person that's a person that comes from severe insecurity
and remember whatever you see her doing to other people she will do to you at
some point the next thing is a woman that is definitely someone who possibly
is narcissistic or toxic is all about appearances so remember this isn't Oh
does she take care of herself that's different than a woman who is completely
superficial and wrapped up in appearances things money power things
like that right so if you've been dating this woman for a couple weeks now and
you have not yet seen her without any makeup on if you have not seen her in
just normal clothes and not all done up that she can't just be herself she's not
comfortable just being her it does mean that she doesn't like to get
dressed up and take care of herself you know go get her hair done things like
that that's completely different but does she is she not capable of just
being real with you so if that's the case then you're probably never gonna
have that deep friendship connection with that person because they're just a
surface level person they don't know how to go really deep because they're not
comfortable in their own skin all of that stuff is external and it's a facade
to mask really that insecurity that's going on inside the next thing is does
she become angry when you go do your own thing
so this is a balance because I'm a woman and I know that for most women we just
want to feel like you care so we want to know that you're putting in the effort
to take the time to nurture this relationship and I hear often from
couples that have been married for years and years and the wife gets all annoyed
at the husband or boyfriend or whatever when he goes on a trip with his guy
friends and for the most part if you're dealing with a woman that's healthy the
only time a woman that is healthy would get upset with a boyfriend her husband
for going on trips is when she herself is feeling neglected so if she feels
that you put more time and energy into nurturing those relationships and
booking those trips and doing things with those guys versus doing things in
your own relationship then yes she's going to be not happy he and get very
angry but if you know that you're nurturing this relationship that you're
being romantic that you're taking her on on date nights that you're you know
showing her that she matters and you want to spend time with her she's your
best friend then she should never get upset when you also want to have your
own life and go do your own thing so again it goes back to what is her life
look like right now is she good does she have that circle of
friends does she have her own life does she have her own hobbies does she have
things that excites her in life so she doesn't and then you come along you are
going to be her world and that's not a healthy dynamic so what you're looking
for is a woman that needs you wants to be with you but isn't me
and again a woman that becomes needy is either a woman that hasn't established
herself and is good to go by herself or a woman that quite frankly is being
neglected and you're not putting in the time and energy to nurture your own
relationship with her the last thing is how does she communicate when times are
tough so you guys are gonna get into disagreements you guys are gonna have
moments when you annoy each other that's just gonna happen
how does she kind of show up does she completely shut down does she give up
very easily and want to just break up over every little thing
how does she show up when times get tough I think that's I mean a huge
indicator of someone's character but also who she is as a person
in terms of where does this relationship gonna go because it's not gonna always
be sunshine and roses and if every time things get hard she just shuts down and
breaks down then this relationship isn't gonna work or it could state you could
stay together forever but it's not gonna be a healthy joyous relationship where
you're able to really communicate and work through your issues and problems
that you may have along the way so seeing how she handles these little
tidbits these little disagreements that happy happened you know not early on in
a relationship but over the course of the first year you're going to start
really seeing who a person is you know the honeymoon phase is not starting to
fade because we always want it to last forever but real life is starting to
happen and so when real life starts to happen how does she show up and again
she's not perfect neither are you but for the most part do you to kind of mesh
well together and you're able to resolve things fairly quickly
or does she harp on things or not tell you what it is that she's really feeling
and I think that women tend to do that often is they don't really are not
really honest with what they expect out of their partner and so they don't know
how to always verbalize their standards and what it is that they want they don't
often tell their partner how I think what I feel they just become a little
passive-aggressive or they shut down men can do this as well that's just not just
a woman thing and when they shut down there's no real communication and really
what that is is just giving up so I hope that that has helped you guys out there
understand women a little bit better and also to understand what things you have
to look for when you are out there dating I think what we're trying to find
is our best friend right we're trying to find the person that we can enjoy life
with and I think when you put more of an emphasis on what you value in a
relationship and not sometimes just the physical you will find the best
relationships for you you have liked this video don't forget to give it a
thumbs up and I will see you next week