First we need to slice up these cucumbers.
- Got it! - No! Where do you even find that?
( music playing )
Rhett:
Link:
Rhett:
and make it ridiculously fancy.
So we're gonna make the most expensive version of this that we can.
We are going to take chicken
from Pasturebird Farms,
then we're gonna take camel milk
and make buttermilk brine outta that,
and then we're going to dredge it in emmer flour
which is heritage strain of wheat.
- Heritage... strain of wheat. - Heritage.
And then for the bun we're doing a saffron duck fat brioche.
Rhett and Link: Nice!
We're actually gonna do a Japanese technique
called tsukemono pickles,
and then last but not least, a honey mustard.
So this is manuka honey.
It comes from one specific tree.
- One tree? - One type of tree
that only grows. It's not like-- there's not one tree.
Guys, honey come from a bee not a tree.
Another thing we're gonna do is throw in this
2013 von Winning Ungeheuer Riesling.
That's it, man. You guys wanna make some food?
So the first step is the bread, that is emmer flour
and something called Antimo Caputo 00 Flour.
Cool and then you're gonna take this duck fat
and you're gonna dump that all in there.
( screams )
Now you're gonna dump in water and milk
and then take the egg yolk and drop that in there, too.
We're just gonna go ahead and run this on low.
Can I taste this? 'Cause I really like raw stuff.
I know you do, yeah. I would never wanna stop you from doing that.
- It's very distinct. - Just take with your hands
- and just scrap all that dough in there. - What does the kneading do?
So the kneading is essentially stretching out
the gluten networks.
- Kneading creates a gluten network. - Gluten networks?
- I bet you we can make some money off of that. - Sure could.
The Gluten Networks.
For the people who don't like gluten.
There's some like natural athletic instinct going into this.
Yeah, I've watched The Gluten Network many times.
Gimme a break.
Yeah! There you go!
Ha! Ow!
So what we're gonna do is we're gonna make Japanese tsukemono pickles,
which is a compressed pickle.
First we need to slice up these cucumbers.
- Got it! - No! Where do you even find that?
- You're not allowed to touch these things. - Fine.
We have a Japanese mandoline actually.
It is still very dangerous,
so this is a chainmail butcher glove
that leaves you just impervious
to any slashings, slicing.
This is great. You should wear one of these all the time.
Screw it. You guys just do that.
I'll be back here with my glove.
Link: Nice!
So this is kombu seaweed.
It's a type of actually Japanese dried algae.
They look like old bowties from like the 1956 Oscars.
- And then we're also going to take, uh, - Hello!
fermented tuna shavings called katsuobushi.
Cats are so bushy.
And then I'm gonna drizzle this Balsalm de Oro.
It is a white balsamic vinegar.
The real work is gonna happen
in this crystal tsukemono press.
It's going to actually compress the pickles down.
Go to sleep, cucumbers.
One week, become a pickle!
Hey, they're back! They've been sleeping for one week.
- Can we taste? - Look at that.
- They're wild, man. - Wow!
There's a weird fishiness.
I don't think it's weird, I think it's fancy.
Let's try this chicken. So we have it actually
sitting in brine, it's been there for 12 hours.
It is a camel buttermilk.
And what we're gonna do is dip it in flour,
fry it in pure chicken fat also known as schmultz.
- Drop this very carefully into our turkey fat. - I wanna do that!
- You don't trust me. I get it. - I don't--
Yeah, that is actually the reason.
I thought the secret for Chick-fil-A was
that it was peanut oil.
Peanut oil is really good for like holding temperature
but it doesn't develop flavor that well.
If you really want flavor use something like chicken fat.
That is looking really nice, actually.
All right, let's talk sauce.
So this is a 2013 von Winning Ungeheuer.
( music playing )
( gargling )
I'm getting notes of wine.
- Yeah. - All right, so we're gonna take the wine
and we're gonna pour it in this pan.
So what this is gonna do, it's gonna take all those notes,
all that piercing acidity and it's just gonna reduce them down
to like that amount. It's super concentrated.
And then you're gonna dump all that Dijon mustard.
And so that is the raw manuka honey
- from the one very tiny tree. - The one little tiny tree.
- And then how much of this-- - And then just like a little pinch.
You can pinch and then you can whisk and then you can taste.
You know what? That should be our nicknames.
Pinch, Whisk, and Taste.
You can be Whisk. That'd be great if you can whisk all that together.
I'm gonna have to pinch Whisk if he keeps this up.
Salt? Need anything?
I think it needs to go on a sandwich.
There is the bun.
And of course the pickles go on the bottom.
Let's do more than the normal amount.
Since we're gonna be sharing this.
And of course we have packetized our honey mustard sauce.
That's beautiful.
Link, that's impressive.
- Let's lower the top. - And then the top.
Ooh!
Look at that thing.
And in case we forgot,
this is what the original looks like.
This is for you, beautiful Pasturebird.
- Rhett: Show it to the peeps. - Link: Oh gosh!
- Link: Wow! - That is unreal.
Everybody grab a piece.
Oh, how much did this thing cost?
$208.33.
$208?
It tastes very fancy.
It's not as good as a Chick-fil-A sandwich.
I think this may be the first time
we haven't actually made it better.
Am I hurt? Yes.
Am I personally insulted by you? Absolutely.
Do I agree? I kinda-- I kinda do.
I kinda do.
Leave a comment below
with what fast food dish we should fancify next.
And click through to watch us try discontinued cereals
to figure out which one should be brought back.
Link:
It's now available at Mythical.Store.
Waffles not included.