- [Jordan] Been to a Trump rally before?
- No, sir.
- [Jordan] What are your expectations?
- Truth.
- Truth?
At a Trump rally?
- Yeah. - Good luck.
(upbeat rock music)
- Barack Obama had big part of 9/11.
- Which part?
- Not being around, always on vacation, never in the office.
- Why do you think Barack Obama
wasn't in the Oval Office on 9/11?
- That I don't know.
I'd like to get to the bottom of that.
- We don't even know if he's a citizen.
- If you don't look at the birth certificate
there's almost no evidence there.
- Exactly.
- So, there is nothing Barack Obama could do
to prove he was born here.
- If there was maybe witnesses
that were attendants at his birth.
- Like his mother, would you listen to his mother?
- No, no, she has motivation to lie.
- So you don't trust
Donald Trump's birth certificate either?
- Yeah, because he's been here forever--
- How do you know, what's your proof?
- Well, his parents--
- No, they're biased, I'm talking about like people
who could be in the room. - Why would they be biased?
- Well, I'm just using your logic against you.
- Okay.
- Outside of having no proof, what proof do you have?
- I don't have any.
- [Jordan] You don't have any proof?
- My opinion. - Your opinion.
And what's your source?
- Um, just Facebook or Twitter, I mean, everything, and I--
- So you'll look at, like, facts and (bleep)
and you put it all together. - Exactly.
- Obama is a Muslim, he's a terrorist.
Nobody will ever tell me different.
Do I have proof?
No.
Do I have articles?
No.
- But your mind is made up without any information.
- My mind is made up.
- Fill in the blank for me.
Two men getting married is, blank.
- Disgusting.
- I should answer it's legal in the United States.
- Oh, it's legal, but I don't like it.
- Do you think a gay couple
should have the same rights as a het--
- No, I don't, I really don't.
I don't think it's fair.
- [Jordan] To the gay couple?
- Well, no, but, the regular couple,
they work so hard, you know.
And the gay couple, they want more.
- When you say more, do you mean equal?
- Yeah, they want equal in that.
- And that's just too much? - Yeah.
- No, that's the wrong answer, sorry, hold on.
One word descriptor, Joe Biden.
- Dickless.
- Elizabeth Warren?
Scummy. - Pete Buttigieg.
- Pete Buttigieg?
- Pete Butt?
That's two words.
- I can't say the whole thing on camera.
- [Jordan] What's the whole thing?
- Pete Buttplug.
- Pete Buttplug, oh, it's homophobic!
That's why you can't say it.
Can a woman be president?
- The presidency is a man's job.
- I have, Women are qualified to be president.
- No.
A female has more hormones.
She could start a war in 10 seconds
if she has hot flashes, whatever, boom!
- Haven't all wars been started by men?
- Mm, yes.
Whenever I hear president, I think of man.
It's a man's job.
What's the, I may be--
- Uh, closed-minded.
- No, yeah, well, no.
Um--
- Misogynistic?
- (laughs) No.
- [Jordan] You're voting against your own interests.
- That's it.
Thank you very much.
- These extreme nations,
they don't treat women with respect.
- We treat women with respect here.
- Yes, we do--
- [Jordan] That's an American ideal.
- Yeah.
- Tell me about your shirt.
What's it say?
- It says (laughs) Hillary sucks.
(laughs) But not like Monica.
- Hilarious.
So we were talking about treating women with respect.
- It's an American ideal
that we treat women with respect, so--
- [Jordan] You got to give me the back of that shirt
one more time, that's too much fun.
- [Man In Red Cap] Trump that bitch!
- Ha-ha, we don't even see the irony in it.
I love it, right?
- You know what, so what, if he wants to grab (bleeps),
I wanna grab (bleep),
I wish I could grab as much (bleeps) as he is.
- Well, I'd like to grab Al Qaeda by the (bleeps),
and shove some Yankee Doodle Dandy right up the chest.
I got news for you, I asked a lot of women here
and half of them would love
to have their (bleep) snatched by Trump.
I got news for you.
- That is news to me.
- One man's sexual assault is another man's flirtation.
- You must be quite the charmer with the ladies
- I used to be.
You know, I got the ring now, one of them landed me.
She even squeezed it so I can't get it off.
Because she sorta like took it off once
and there was a little mark there, so she's no dummy.
- Oh, I think she's a dummy
if she thinks somebody else is gonna (bleep) you.
- It's locker room talk.
That's what boys do.
He didn't do it.
- Well, I don't talk like that.
- Well.
- Do you have any children?
- I do. - Do they talk like that?
- No, they don't.
- So, not those boys.
- Well, no, not those boys.
- Do you have a husband? - I do.
- Does he talk like that? - No.
- Well, not that boy. - No.
- Grab it while you can.
Trump.
- What, what is it?
- The (bleep)!
Yeah, grab it all while you can!
Except I can't talk like that in front of my daughter.
- You just did.
These things you say, people can hear.
Is there anything Trump could say that could come on up
that would make you not vote for him?
- No.
- No matter what he says or does,
I will vote for Donald Trump.
- What if he said the N-word, would you still vote for him?
- Um, it wouldn't be right, but I would still vote for him.
- What if he said, uh, everybody should go, uh,
(bleep) little pigs, would you still vote for him then?
- I would still vote for him. - Yeah?
- Three weeks ago I had a dream,
and in that dream I was given this vision.
- You on a screen printing dream?
Your dream told you that Trump is gonna win,
and then Ivanka, and then Don Junior, and then Eric,
Tiffany is gonna be winning in 2048 and then Barron.
Great.
- [Man In Red] All right.
- But Barron only serves one term.
- [Man In Red] No, no, two terms.
- [Jordan] No, that's only one term, that's four years.
Yeah, actually these are mostly one term presidents.
- [Man In Red] No, you're not reading it right, brother.
- No, this is 2024 to 28, that's four years.
- And then another four.
- No, no, these are one-term presidents.
Ivanka, one term; Don Junior, one term.
- What does it say for Ivanka?
What is the date?
- Ivanka is 2024, 2028.
- That's eight years.
- That's four years!
These have a four year period,
(mumbles) somebody else gets elected.
It doesn't say anything about reelected.
- It does!
It says, has her getting elected in 2024 and 2028.
- Your math is wrong.
- I think the impeachment trial itself is a joke, period.
- It's a shitshow.
- We think it's a complete sham.
He hasn't done anything wrong.
- How did we get here with no evidence.
- He didn't do anything.
Well said.
- (mumbles) right, he didn't do anything.
- He didn't do anything.
- So, we should let everybody testify.
- Correct.
Oh, yeah, no.
- No? - No.
- You think John Bolton should testify?
- No.
- Why not?
- Well, he could testify,
but I think he's vengeful for getting fired from his job.
I think he's a liar.
- John Bolton's a liar.
- Absolutely.
- There should be a system set up where he takes an oath
and then under oath he tells the truth,
otherwise he's punished.
- I think there should be, yeah.
- And maybe there's a judge who's put in charge,
like the highest judge in the land,
appointed by a Republican,
and then we can all see what he has to say.
Would you be for a system like that?
- Sure.
- I read the transcript for,
not verbatim, but I've read the transcript, meaning like,
I've watched everyone read it on the news.
I haven't seen the transcript--
- You know that's not what reading the transcript means?
But you watched people read the transcript.
- Right, I haven't personally read the transcript,
have you read the transcript?
No (chuckles).
- I have, spoiler alert, he asked a foreign country
to interfere in our election.
That's crazy, right?
It's (bleep) crazy.
- There's no, whatever that word is, quid pro crow,
My lips are cold.
- It's hard to say.
- Right.
- It's even harder to convince other people
that it happened.
- New word I just learned.
- There's no crime, that's been,
there's no crime that he's been accused of.
- What does that mean?
- What? What do you mean?
- They're not making the accusation
or brought an actual penal code...
Yeah.
- You can tell he hasn't done anything wrong,
just by his demeanor.
I mean, he would be trying to hide things.
- If he were blocking witnesses or evidence
or something like that, you would be like,
Oh you're hiding something, but otherwise--
- Right.
He's saying, Let them see everything.
- Let them see everything. - I'll prove whatever you--
want me to prove.
- Right.
Trump is blocking witnesses.
- I don't care. - Oh!
But we were saying earlier that if you're blocking something
it shows that you have something to hide.
- Didn't Obama hide his birth certificate?
- He did, and Trump found that thing.
And it said, he was born American citizen.
- Yeah. - I know, so,
so, who's got egg on their face?
- Yes.
- No, who has egg on their face?
- Well.
- Read the transcript.
- [Jordan] Read the transcript.
- Yeah.
- Did you read the transcript?
- I don't have to (chuckles).
Everyone else has.
I can read it if I need to.
- Yeah, but it's important
that everybody read the transcript.
- It is very important.
Pay attention and think for yourself.
- But to be clear, you have not read the transcript.
- I haven't. - Right.
But it is just important.
- Yeah, don't be a sheep, think for yourself.
- But again, just to be very clear,
you have not read. - I have not read it.
- You just trusted somebody else.
- Correct.
- What did you say about, don't be a sheep--
- Think for yourself, do your own research.
- Do your own research.
Right.
Don't be a sheep.
It was a message these people
who were being herded through gates
and corralled into pens to be guard over by men on horses
knew all too well:
these totally not sheep
are ready for 11 more months of this.
Whatever this is.
And so am I.
Campaign 2020, here we go again.
(upbeat music)