In a world that is remarkably imperfect, many of us pride ourselves on projecting pixels
of perfection.
We share images and videos online highlighting the best parts of our brightest days, hoping
others see only the parts of us we want them to.
So we exaggerate the good.
Lie about the bad.
And hide the fact that we’re actually human.
See I learned a long time ago that it’s ok to be human.
So today I plan to share those parts of me that aren’t necessarily the brightest but
are in fact 100% me.
Here are my biggest regrets and the emotions that make me human.
Don’t judge!
Number one is caring what other people think about me.
I can’t talk enough about the amount of time and energy I’ve wasted in past years,
worrying myself about what others thought about me.
If I did, this video would be entirely too long, and ain’t nobody got time for that.
So I’ll just say this.
All of the time and energy I put into caring about what others thought about me, was time
and energy I could have put into myself.
Learning new things, exploring my true interest, and investing in my own creativity much sooner.
But I will say that stumbling through this experience has taught me the importance of
knowing thy self.
If you know who you are, the opinions of others tend to be the last thing you care about.
In the words of my dad, "you can’t define a man who already knows who he is."
number two is keeping people in my life that were only meant for a season.
There’s an age-old saying that goes “people come into your life for a reason, a season
or a lifetime.”
The meaning behind this is simple, yet incredibly powerful when you start to understand it in
relation to your own life.
Now in no way am I trying to sound rude when I say this, but I made the mistake of placing
seasonal relationships on a lifetime pedestal.
And because of this, I missed the opportunity to fully understand the reason why they were
in my life for just a period of time.
I was so hung up on trying to figure out what happened or why we stop talking, to realize
that maybe that season has passed, and we’re each now in a new chapter of life and that’s
ok.
Number three is being too much of an introvert at times.
Now I’m a little weird, I have to admit.
See normal people are either extroverted or introverted.
But me on the other hand, I kid you not, I feel like I’m both.
See, I love interacting with people and having interesting conversations but I also love
silence and just observing without saying much.
I also love my alone time.
Now I don’t know if being too much of an introvert is really a thing or not, but sometimes
this causes me not to open up as much as I could to those key relationships and friendships
that I have.
However, it’s gotten better over the years and it’s still a work in progress for me.
But I thought I’d mention it in case you’re dealing with something similar.
Number four being scared of change.
There’s no denying that change is the process of life.
It’s the one thing you can argue is guaranteed to happen regardless of what stage of life
you’re in.
Now I can’t say that change itself scared me but the emotions that come with change
did.
For example, having a fear of failure.
A fear of discomfort; a fear of criticism.
I was also afraid of things that were different than what I was used to.
And because of this, I was timid and hesitant about making decisions that would require
change.
It also spilled over into this idea of lacking independent thinking.
Needless to say, I sat out on this journey to break up with fear in effort to regain
control of my life.
And all of this started with a poem I wrote titled Fear, that I’ll link to below in
case you’re interested in listening to it.
Number five rying to change my personality.
Now there’s a bit of irony in this statement because, if you’ve been following my content
and consuming my writing for a while then you’re very familiar with the phrase "stay
true to you."
And how much I stress the importance of doing just that.
Well, it wasn’t always that way for me.
I’ve tried changing my personality, my interest, my energy, you name it.
All in effort to impress others or to fit in with what I thought others wanted.
Later realizing that most people don’t care like you think they do.
Now as many would say, hindsight is 20/20 and while part of me regrets these things,
I am still very grateful for the lessons these experiences have taught me.
So if there is anything I can give you to take away from this conversation, it would
be to embrace change across every inch of life and relationships.
And when you’re confused about what to do, trust your gut and always stay true to you.
I’ll see you in the next one.
Peace!