Let's go to the men
who actually enjoy a woman
who they have to chase
and is playing hard to get.
The reality is that,
that is within the dynamic of
men being fixated on infatuation.
That's when men may want sex from you.
(Music)
Do men love women who play hard to get?
You hear all the time that
men are the hunters
and men love a chase
and blah, blah, blah.
Listen, you all got this whole game twisted
and you are being fed
some false perceptions of men
when it comes to healthy relationships.
Now, I want to stress that
when we're talking about healthy relationships,
a lot of the information you've been provided
is wrong and misguided.
And of course, I'm here to explain why.
So, when we talk about
do men love women who play hard to get?
The simple answer is no.
No, when a man is looking to have
a serious relationship with you.
So, let's go to the men who actually enjoy
a woman who they have to chase
and is playing hard to get.
The reality is that,
that is within the dynamic of
men being fixated on infatuation.
That's when men may want sex from you.
That's when men are seeing you as a conquest,
is this game they're playing,
and yes, they may enjoy the fact that
they have to put in extra effort to get you.
And in reality, I would argue
it's not the chase that they enjoy.
It's the fact that
you are not accessible to everyone.
It's the fact that
you are not easily had by anyone.
Because if you played hard to get,
but he knew of you as a woman
who's been easily had.
And I don't say that in a disrespectful way,
but in a factual way.
If his perception of you
is that you have been easily had
by many other men,
then you playing hard to get
isn't going to turn him on,
isn't going to show you in a better light,
isn't going to make him want you more.
So, it's really not.
Even though I said yes initially
because I do believe that again,
some men love the challenge, the game.
But it's less about the actual game
and the fact that everyone can have you
and he wants to be the one that says he can.
And so, that's what he's really drawn to.
But when we're talking about real feelings,
romantic true desire in a woman,
you got to throw that stuff out the window.
The whole men being hunters mentality
doesn't apply when they're
emotionally invested in a woman.
Because now, the hunt the chase,
you playing hard to get
hurts like hell.
It is damaging to them.
It hurts.
It can create insecurity in them.
It's a struggle.
It's stressful.
They don't want that.
They want you to embrace that
they want to love you.
That they want to show that
they're the man that can be there for you.
They don't want this game playing.
They don't want this cat and mouse,
they want you to embrace them.
And the more you play hard to get,
the harder it will be for him
to keep up the effort.
Because now he has to worry,
is she playing me?
Is she really serious about me?
Now, he has so much more to question
because you are making things difficult.
You seem confusing.
You become frustrating.
He can build animosity towards you,
resentfulness.
And even those who stay in the chase
after they get you
they're like okay, I'm done now
it's your turn.
I'm not going to keep doing all this work.
I had to do all this work to get you
and you want me to keep
putting forth that kind of effort?
Now it's payback time.
It's time for me to receive.
So, you see a lot of those dynamics
become very unhealthy relationships.
I'm not going to sit here and say
it's never worked out for anyone.
But I'm going to tell you in most cases,
it does not work out
because it is built on an unhealthy,
unstable, toxic foundation.
But the original question is,
do men love women who play hard to get?
Again, I tell you no
when he's serious about you.
When he's not, he might not mind it.
And in today's world, you could argue that
even then, he may not care for it
because nowadays,
it's easier to get it from someone else.
Why is he really going to enjoy
the hassle that you give him?
But there are men who love...
They look at it like a video game.
Again, it's a conquest, it's a mission.
And once they finish and achieve their mission,
guess what? They're gone.
They drop you onto the next game,
onto the next conquest.
So, do you really want that dynamic?
There's nothing really healthy about it.
And this is why I'm telling you that
you've been fed negative
unhealthy perceptions of things.
These principles do not work
in your favor
for something healthy and successful
and I stress that.
We're talking about healthy, successful,
long lasting relationships.
It does not work like that.
So, again, when he's emotionally invested,
when he's serious about you,
no games, no chasing.
Either is going to be a mutual effort
to build something amazing
or you might as well shoot yourself in the foot now.
Because that's what you're going to do
if you do this whole chasing
playing hard to get thing.
It's risky business,
some have gotten away with it.
Many have paid a price for it.
I don't want you to pay a price for it.
I want you to have success,
fulfillment, happiness, and an amazing relationship.
I hope you enjoyed this video.
I hope you found it helpful
and I'll see you in the next video.
(Music)