Okay, so before I give you
the only dating advice you'll ever need as a man,
I need to shed some light
on some of the worst dating advice you have ever heard.
You may not like what you're about to hear from me,
but sometimes the most loving thing
someone can do for you, is expose your blind spots,
especially if they're holding you back in life.
As always, take what resonates and leave the rest.
If you're new to my channel,
I help men decode modern women
so you can find, attract, and keep your keeper,
or simply have better relationships with women.
Welcome to just the tip.
Okay, so first let's look at one of the most
common bits of bad advice
you hear so often.
One, just be yourself.
Oh man, just be yourself.
How many times have you heard that one?
Comment.
This is terrible dating and relationship advice.
If being yourself worked, you wouldn't be single.
If being yourself worked,
you wouldn't have had relationships with toxic women
that ended in soul crushing heartbreak.
If being yourself worked,
you wouldn't be stuck in a loveless marriage.
Ouch, I know, I know.
I told you this may be painful, it may be a terrible realization,
but I want you to be happy,
or at least at peace in your life.
And the truth can set you free.
Moving on, two, you have to be rich, handsome, ripped,
and at least six feet tall to get a girlfriend.
How many times have you heard this one?
Comment.
This is another copout, my loves.
Look around you and you will see couples
where the man isn't any of those things.
I'm not telling you this to make you feel bad,
but to give you hope.
If other dudes can get decent women
without being Chads and Tyrone's, so can you.
Key point, what women say they want
and what makes them happy, are often two different things.
Women say they want a man
who's six feet tall, but guess what?
Statistically, they actually want men
who are 4 to 6 inches taller than them,
and they end up with men who are four inches taller than them.
Did they settle? Most often, no.
They tell me they're so happy with their fellas,
they can't believe they ever had a height requirement to begin with.
Key point, part of why women think
they want a man who's six feet tall,
is because that's what other women say they want.
Women are pack oriented and socially influenced.
Not only that, but most women don't even know what six feet tall is,
they are usually off by at least a few inches.
Furthermore, just like women lie about their weight on dating apps,
reducing their actual weight by 15 to 20 pounds,
men fib about their height by 2 to 4 inches.
How is a woman supposed to know what six feet really looks like?
You're probably wondering,
Well, Anna, that's great,
but how do I get past that filter to show her how great I am?
Well, we'll get to that in a moment, I promise.
But first, let's look at another bad dating tip.
Three, give up on women.
There are no good ones left, just rent one.
How many times have you said this one? Fess up.
I read this one in the comments all the time.
And yes, I do read your comments.
The fact is, there are some good ones left.
They may be more difficult to find, attract, and keep,
but they are out there.
However, just like all things of value,
they are scarce and there is fierce competition for them.
Fret not, you still have a chance
if you don't have a fixed, rigid mindset.
If you have a fixed mindset,
it's easier to throw in the towel on love
and try to convince others they're wasting their time too.
Key point, people who fail by giving up
often don't like seeing others succeed,
because it proves it can be done.
When others who are no better than us succeed,
it shines a light on our own inadequacies, inabilities, and fears.
If no one succeeds, it's because no one
can succeed with women.
If some succeed despite not having
the advantages you think they need,
the harsh truth is it's because they're doing something you aren't.
Key point, you're not saving men from heartache.
If a man is single and lonely,
his heart will still ache just in a different way.
Most people, men or women who give up
and live in bitterness are those who don't want
to leave their comfort zone to take risks.
It's less scary to simply feel a victim.
Fearville grows into bitter town and eventually becomes Jaded City.
If you want to take a road trip to the Love Meadow,
you're going to have to take a deep breath,
suspend your disbelief that change is possible,
and leave your comfort zone.
Those of you who've read my memoir, first of all, thank you,
know I used to be cripplingly shy.
I couldn't even walk down the street
without feeling pitifully self-conscious.
I had to get way out of my comfort zone to overcome it,
and now look at me.
There goes another plane.
You're going to have to be brave,
because the only dating advice you need
as a man to be potentially successful in love,
is to be your better self.
So, if you're not succeeding in love,
it may be because you're fibbing to yourself
and others about who you are.
You're not being your true self,
and you're not being your better self.
Now, what the heck does that mean?
Well, I'm glad you asked.
It means you're holding yourself back.
Just before I share what that can look like,
if you're finding value in this video,
please like it and consider subscribing.
And thank you so much for your super thanks donations,
and a big hug to the Wingmam fam YouTube members.
Okay, let's move on.
Okay, let's assume right now "being yourself,"
looks like you are grossly overweight with a gaming addiction,
in debt up to your mischievous eyeballs,
addicted to porn, painkillers, or pity parties,
thinking you're not good enough,
for the right kind of woman that you really want.
Or maybe assuming your passions or interests like in frogs,
aliens, ayahuasca, model trains,
or whatever is too weird for women.
Which of these is your better self?
None is, your true self is the you that moves you
toward what's emotionally and mentally healthy for you.
The you that ensures you stay
on the path toward inner awareness,
personal growth, and maybe even enlightenment.
Your true self inspires you to become your better self,
whatever that looks like for you in your life,
regardless of what anyone else thinks.
Key point, when you live in your true better self,
you strive towards growth because you love yourself,
not because you dislike yourself.
Many "successful" people strive to achieve outer success
because they don't like themselves
and think that success will change that.
They think that accolades from others,
will validate them and make them lovable.
That used to be me.
True validation comes from within, not externally.
This looks like you one,
making decisions based on an inner drive
that moves you, and isn't intended to impress others.
Two, making choices that give
your life meaning, purpose, and joy.
Three, deciding you want to be the kind of man
who is fit and healthy because it feels good,
and being healthy helps you accomplish
those meaningful goals, not because women like it.
Four, taking action to turn your life around
because it's not serving you and the man you want to be,
not because women like it.
Five, letting go of the pity parties.
Because having control of your life
means accepting accountability where you can
and embracing agency, not because women like it.
Six, talking passionately about amphibians,
or aliens, or spiritual mind trips
because you love those things
and aren't afraid to be your real self.
When you do these things for you,
there's no room for resentment,
bitterness, or feeling like a victim.
Those feelings are replaced with a feeling
of being in control of your life and being empowered.
When you do this, a funny thing happens.
You become magnetic to women.
You don't have to choose any, but they will want you.
And when you have options,
you can be as discerning as you like.
Suddenly, your mindset isn't, am I good enough for her?
It's, is she right enough for me?
Telling you these truths is tough love,
but it's good for you even if you don't like me for it.
However, if you've made it this far,
perhaps you're ready to make positive changes in your life.
Okay, so if you're ready to suspend disbelief,
to start making brave changes, and want some gentle guidance,
my WakeUp2Love program will help you.
It's designed to work from wherever you are now,
so you can start making small shifts that add up to massive changes.
WakeUp2Love is a self-development program,
it is not a pick up artist program.
You won't be memorizing lines, tricks,
or tactics that become a crutch,
relying on outcome and external validation that block true intimacy.
Instead, you'll learn to become your real,
better self in manageable steps.
Now, if you're sick and tired of feeling bitter, helpless, or hopeless,
do yourself a favor and get my program today and do the work.
It only works if you do the work.
I'll put a link in the show notes and the pinned comment,
and I'm there for you every step of the way.
You got this, lots of love, God bless.
This is not a green screen,
that's all.