- Hey, guys.
I know it's been a minute since talking about Rocko
and everything that happened,
and we did receive his necropsy results,
but I wanted to start this video by first just saying,
like, thank you to everybody who reached out
and offered their condolences to me and my family.
You guys, we literally received thousands and thousands
of messages, DMs...
We received things in the mail
that were just amazingly beautiful.
The fanart that was submitted,
everything was just really, really touching
and really cool to see.
And I just want you guys to know that it's appreciated,
even if you didn't receive a direct response.
It felt really overwhelming in a good way,
but we couldn't respond to everything, so...
But I wanted you guys to know that I'm reading them,
I'm seeing them, I'm appreciating them,
and I wanted to make sure that you guys knew that
because it really has meant a lot
through my healing process.
(bright music)
One of the things that was really, really cool is,
in a lot of the fanart,
I feel like you guys were able to capture,
like, his essence,
and it didn't just look like a toco toucan off the internet.
It looked like Rocko.
Like, in his eyes, it just really looked like him, so...
I really appreciate those.
So I wanted to take a minute and just acknowledge
some of you that sent in snail mail.
A lot of you sent me food gifts
because I think food really heals.
I think apparently we all agree on that,
so thank you guys for thinking of me.
Some of the letters that you sent
and, like, the messages that were in these cards
were so powerful.
And they always came at the exact right time
of things that I needed to hear.
This card says, "There are lessons for us in everything,
even the hard things,
even the things that break our heart."
And it says, "May you continue to learn how brave you are,
how much you can love,
and how much light one thing can hold."
You guys just, like, knew exactly what to say
on a lot of these.
There was a young girl who sent me a letter,
and she drew each and one of...
Each and every one of my birds on the paper on the letter,
which I thought was really, really cute,
and Rocko, of course, at the top.
Ashley, I wanted to let you know that I know you said
that I'm going to be meeting you at a MasterClass soon
and that you wanted me to wear the bracelet
that was within this,
but the envelope unfortunately came ripped,
and there was no bracelet inside.
So I'm really sorry, but I didn't want you to be...
Think that I didn't like it or something
if I wasn't wearing the bracelet at our MasterClass.
So I wanted to let you know that.
I tried to write each and every one of you guys back.
Some of you contributed to Rocko's medical bills,
which we never asked for but greatly appreciated.
Like, you guys just...
Above and beyond.
For those of you that have been with us for a while
here at the Bird Tricks family,
a few years ago, we lost our Bandit,
which is still really...
Ugh, fresh for me.
I miss him every day too.
And I was sent a really beautiful poem
at the time that we lost him
that I shared in his video with all of you.
And a lot of you, I felt like it resonated
and it spoke to you as well,
based on whatever you were going through at the time.
Well, this time, from my amazing friends Steve and Carol,
they sent me a poem,
and it's completely different than the one that I had read
when we lost Bandit,
and it's different in a way that just really speaks to...
Just really speaks to Rocko specifically.
And I know I'm sure that these poems,
like, resonate to everybody
very differently and very deeply,
but it was something that I wanted to share
because I felt like...
Sharing the one that I had received with Bandit
helped a lot of you through whatever you were going through
at that time.
And I kind of feel like this one
will serve the same purpose.
So at some point when I'm feeling
a little bit more put together,
I'll read this for you guys.
The other thing that I wanted to share with you guys
were just some of the comments...
These are very, very recent that I pulled.
That just meant so much to me.
And if you don't hear yours,
it doesn't mean it didn't mean a lot to me.
These were just super recent.
I had a really bad day a couple days ago.
Just sometimes, I think grief hits you
when you're not expecting it
and just really takes over your world temporarily,
and I had one of those days,
and these messages were making me laugh and cry, and they...
They just...
They spoke a lot to me, so I wanted to share them
because I want you guys to know how much it means to me
that you are saying these things and seeing these things.
And there were so many, honestly.
But yeah.
So Jodi wrote, and she said,
"The way that he lit up and played and fed himself
when you came to visit him,
that was his message to you that you were his heart,
and I'm sure he was telling you,
'It's okay, Mama.
I'll be on your shoulder protecting you
and stealing food when you're not looking
every day for the rest of your life.
You'll see me in the colors of the sunset
and the beauty in the flowers.
we'll play together again, someday.'
Imagine all the fun foods and treats he can eat now
without worry of blood sugar spikes and drops.
You did right by him,
and the love and care you showed
was a great example for your daughter."
This person's username.
I'm not mentally okay, but don't worry about me said,
"I sadly found Rocko after he passed,
and I could tell you'd had your feathered baby
for a long while.
I'm glad he had you though.
You guys look...
You guys took extremely good care of each other."
I thought that was really cool
because he took really good care of me,
and it was neat to hear that
from someone who's new to the channel.
Tonya wrote, "My heart broke for you
as I watched what was happening.
Rocko knew how much he was loved.
His spirit is always with you."
Isabelle says, "They soar high and out of our reach,
but the impact they have on us is forever.
Remembering is a gift."
And that's one that I try to remind myself every day,
that I shouldn't be upset and crying and mourning.
I should be...
Really grateful to be able to have these memories.
John wrote, "I'm so sorry for your loss.
I've been following you guys
for the better part of three years.
Your ways click with me.
I have yet to get a bird of my own,
but that will change in the next few years.
Trying to find the perfect rehome.
All that aside, I've been enamored by Rocko
and your personal relationship with him.
As someone who just had to put their friend to rest,
Jake, my dog, my confidant, my best friend,
my reason for getting out of bed,
I get the heartbreak.
Thanks for all you do.
Kenrick wrote, "We all know how much you really miss him.
Rest in peace, Rocko."
And Samantha said,
"I like to believe our animal babies
will welcome us to our paradise,
and he wants you to be happy when you think of him.
Such a sweet story, rest in peace."
And that one really resonates too
because I don't want him to be...
I want him to see me and know that I'm still,
like, living and helping and not just sad,
but it's hard right now.
This person said, "Hugs to you.
He isn't suffering anymore,"
which is a huge thing I have to remember.
Elise says, "Gotta be thankful that Facebook photos
sends us...
Sends these to us.
I'm sure he is waiting for you with your family.
I believe that all of our loved ones are.
And never give up...
Never give up helping,
as I think that's why...
You are here on earth."
That one meant so much to me.
Amber wrote, "I'm so sorry Rocko
couldn't stay with you longer."
That's exactly how I felt.
I felt, like, robbed of time with him, and so...
And those were just a few of the ones I pulled.
You guys were amazing and very motivating
and very helpful for navigating through my grief.
So thank you.
So like this video title indicates,
Rocko's necropsy results really shocked me,
and I was filled with anger and confusion.
Many of you know the hemochromatosis talk.
"Hemochromatosis" is another word for iron storage disease.
Back in the day,
when toucans were first brought into captivity,
they were fed things like monkey chow,
and they were dying from iron storage
because they were getting too much iron in their diet.
And nowadays, we know to be wary of iron.
And so there's been a diet that has been developed
that's very high fruit diet, non-citrus.
We have a specialized pellet,
created by a company called Missouri,
that is a low-iron pellet
specifically made for toucans
and iron-susceptible or iron-sensitive animals.
And I went so far as to have...
Like, we have a special faucet in our sink
that gives us reverse osmosis water for him,
so that there's absolutely no iron in water,
which was controversial.
I always had people saying, like,
"Why do you give him special water?
That's really over the top and unnecessary."
But I did because I was just...
I was just nervous of any iron
that could sneak into his diet.
And back in October of 2021,
when Rocko was first diagnosed with being pre...
Being diabetic,
a blood test had also revealed
that he had iron storage disease.
Now, this is touchy because if you ask most toucan people,
they will tell you with 100% certainty
that you cannot diagnose iron storage disease
through a blood test.
It has to be done through a liver biopsy,
which, as you can imagine, is incredibly invasive,
and most people don't do it for that reason.
So people don't usually put a lot of weight
on this blood test,
and I was told not to trust the blood test
and to just not worry about it
by a lot of toucan breeder-type people.
But this was a space where I had to really pick a path.
You know, Dave and I talk about this all the time.
Like, pick a path, pick a person,
pick a path, pick a trainer, pick a path.
Because if you start taking information
from too many different sources, it ends up...
Your head is gonna just explode,
and you won't end up going anywhere clearly.
So I chose to trust my vet,
and I did a 90-day medication treatment for iron storage
while we were also playing with insulin,
trying to figure out how to get his body
to respond to insulin.
It was easier for me to do this than to do nothing,
if that kind of makes sense, because ignoring data...
I just couldn't ignore data.
I just felt like, "I have this data.
I need to do something."
Did the treatment work?
No.
But neither did the treatment for diabetes,
and doing nothing would've got me to the exact same path,
so honestly it was just kind of a lose-lose path.
Well, it turns out that that blood test
was actually correct.
Rocko's necropsy showed that he had iron storage disease,
which...
Pretty much did damage to his organs,
including his pancreas,
which made him susceptible to getting diabetes.
I think the hard part about this
is this means that when I did the test early 2021
and found out he was pre-diabetic
and thought that that was what I was combating,
that he already had iron storage.
There were no signs or symptoms that I saw.
I had no idea.
He looked perfect.
He acted perfect.
Most days.
He could be a moody 'can sometimes, but...
This means he had it long before
it ever showed its ugly face and symptoms.
This means that maybe that blood test is only accurate
when the animal is so far gone.
I have no idea.
I am not the veterinarian here.
I'm not the scientist.
This is a study of a single toucan not all toucans.
When I asked my vet how in the world
could Rocko have gotten iron storage disease
on a diet that is well known
to be utilized today with toucans,
she had no idea.
Like, there's no answer.
I don't know.
She doesn't know; nobody knows.
Why did he get it?
I don't know.
We avoided iron like the plague,
like, to the point of getting made fun of sometimes
by other toucan people of being so excessive about it,
so it just like...
I don't get it; it makes zero sense to me.
I almost feel like I avoided iron
to the point of what I previously thought
was, like, a detriment,
by not offering protein that includes iron
and veggies.
Like, low iron veggies and things like that,
that I discovered could be fed during
trying to treat diabetes through diet.
But he ended up with iron storage disease,
and that's ultimately, like...
That's what did it.
So that's it.
Following the latest information on toucans
didn't save him from the same fate that toucans suffered,
like, years ago
when they were first brought into captivity,
and I don't know why.
If you have a toucan as a pet,
please make sure you're keeping up on your well bird exams.
We talk about this so much for parrots,
and now it's really, really relevant for toucans
and any animal, honestly.
They should be getting an annual well animal exam,
but this is what we call well bird exam.
And like, keep an eye on those blood sugar levels
and make sure that you give your toucan a lot of sunlight
'cause they love to sun bathe
and tell them you love them every day.
And on the days that they'll let you,
show them that you love them.
Hanging out with my cutie 'can.
So cute.
You're the best.
I was just on a birthday trip for about four days,
and this is my first day being home,
sayin' hi to everybody.
But I feel like Rocko was the most happy to see me.
(bird squawking)
Happy to see you too, bud; I missed you.
I missed you.
To those I love and those who loved me,
when I am gone, release me.
Let me go.
I have so many things to see and do.
You mustn't tie yourself to me with tears.
Be happy that we had so many years.
I gave you my love.
You can only guess how much you gave me in happiness.
I thank you for the love you each have shown,
and now it's time I traveled on alone.
So grieve a while for me if grieve you must.
Then, let your grief be comforted by trust.
It's only for a while that we must part,
so bless the memories within your heart.
I won't be far away, for life goes on.
So if you need me, call and I will come.
Though you can't see or touch me, I'll be near.
And if you listen with your heart, you'll hear.
(heartfelt music)
all of my love around you, soft and clear.
And then when you must come this way alone,
I'll greet you with a smile and say welcome home.
(heartfelt music)