BIDEN, TO THE WHITE HOUSE, ONCE
JOE BIDEN IS SWORN IN TOMORROW
AT NOON.
THE USHER HAS TO DO IT BECAUSE
THE DEPARTING PRESIDENT WON’T.
YORP
YOU KNOW, I HAVE FOUND MYSELF
THINKING OVER THE PAST WEEK OR
SO -- IF MR. TRUMP COULD HAVE
SEEN INTO THE FUTURE TO THIS
DAY, IF IN 2015 HE WAS THINKING
ABOUT RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT, IF
HE COULD HAVE SEEN -- PICKED ONE
DAY IN THE FUTURE, PICKED THIS
DAY, THE FINAL DAY OF HIS
PRESIDENCY, TO KNOW WHAT IT WAS
GOING TO BE LIKE THIS DAY, TO
KNOW WHAT HE WOULD HAVE WROUGHT
AND BROUGHT DOWN UPON HIMSELF BY
THIS DAY, DO YOU THINK HE WOULD
HAVE RUN IN THE FIRST PLACE?
HONESTLY.
DON’T THINK ABOUT HOW HE THINKS
ABOUT THE COUNTRY, WE STILL
DON’T UNDERSTAND THAT, BUT WE
KNOW HOW HE THINKS ABOUT HIMSELF
AND HIS OWN INTERESTS.
HE IS LEAVING OFFICE WITH THE
MAIN LEGITIMATELY OPEN QUESTION
ON THE LAST DAY AND THE LAST
NIGHT OF HIS PRESIDENCY BEING,
WILL HE TRY TO PARDON HIMSELF?
TO AVOID FUTURE FEDERAL
PROSECUTION AND POTENTIAL
FEDERAL IMPRISONMENT FOR HIS
CRIMES?
HE IS LEAVING OFFICE TOMORROW
WITH THIS CONUNDRUM OF HOW HE’S
GOING TO KEEP HIMSELF OUT OF
PRISON.
HE COULDN’T EVEN PULL A RICHARD
NIXON IN THE END, BECAUSE
APPARENTLY HE DOES NOT TRUST
THAT HIS VICE PRESIDENT WOULD
PARDON HIM IF HE RESIGNED, LIKE
FORD AT LEAST DID FOR NIXON.
HE COULDN’T EVEN COUNT ON THAT
BECAUSE HE CAN’T TRUST HIS VICE
PRESIDENT TO DO THAT FOR HIM,
NOT AFTER HE SICCED A MURDEROUS
MOB ON HIS VICE PRESIDENT LESS
THAN TWO WEEKS AGO IN THE "HANG
MIKE PENCE" ATTACK ON THE
CAPITOL THAT HE DIRECTLY
INCITED.
THE PRESIDENT LEAVES OFFICE WITH
HIS SECOND, HIS SECOND SENATE
IMPEACHMENT TRIAL STILL PENDING.
NO PRESIDENT HAS EVER BEEN
CONVICTED IN A SENATE
IMPEACHMENT TRIAL.
DONALD TRUMP STAND AZRIEL CHANCE
OF IT, THOUGH.
HE LEAVES OFFICE WITH HIS
CAMPAIGN CHAIRMAN AND HIS DEPUTY
CAMPAIGN CHAIRMAN CONVICTED
FELON
FELONS, WITH HIS MOST
LONGSTANDING POLITICAL ADVISER,
ROGER STONE, CONVICTED FELON.
WITH HIS CAMPAIGN MANAGER, STEVE
BANNON, UNDER FEDERAL INDICTMENT
AND AWAITING TRIAL.
THE CRIMINAL INVESTIGATION OF
HIMSELF AND HIS BUSINESS UNDER
WAY IN NEW YORK, POSSIBLY
ANOTHER CRIMINAL INVESTIGATION
PENDING AGAINST HIM SOON IN THE
STATE OF GEORGIA.
WITH THE LAST TWO BANKS ON EARTH
THAT WOULD STILL DO BUSINESS
WITH HIM PLEDGING NOW TO NEVER
DO SO AGAIN.
ONE OF THEM CLOSING HIS ACCOUNTS
AND CALLING ON HIM TO RESIGN THE
PRESIDENCY.
THE OTHER ONE IS THE ONE TO
WHICH HE HAS PERSONALLY
GUARANTEED OVER $300 MILLION IN
OUTSTANDING LOANS, WHICH ARE
SOON COMING DUE, WITH NO ONE
HAVING ANY SENSE OF HOW HE WILL
POSSIBLY PAY THEM.
WITH HIS BUSINESS INTERESTS
CRATERING AT HOME AND ACROSS THE
GLOBE.
WITH A LIVE QUESTION IN PLAY
WHETHER HE WILL BE THE FIRST
PRESIDENT TO EVER FACE A
LIFETIME LEGAL BAN ON HIM EVER
RUNNING FOR OFFICE AGAIN.
WITH EVEN HIS WIFE LEAVING
WASHINGTON WITH AN APPROVAL
RATING NEARLY 20 POINTS LOWER
THAN ANY OTHER FIRST LADY IN
HISTORY.
SHE’S THE ONLY FIRST LADY IN
HISTORY TO BE VIEWED ON BALANCE
NEGATIVELY BY THE AMERICAN
PUBLIC.
THAT’S LIKE A PHYSICAL
IMPOSSIBILITY, BUT HE’S MANAGED
IT SOMEHOW.
HIS LONG-TIME FIXER AND LAWYER
IS ALSO NOT ONLY NOW A CONVICTED
FELON, HE’S ONE WHO HAS
COOPERATED AND IS COOPERATING IN
AN ONGOING WAY WITH MULTIPLE
ONGOING INVESTIGATIONS INTO THE
PRESIDENT, INCLUDINGING THE
CRIMINAL BANK FRAUD AND TAX
FRAUD ONE THAT IS ONGOING IN NEW
YORK.
HIS NIECE IS SUING HIM TO GET
THE INHERITANCE SHE SAYS HE
STOLE FROM HER.
HE’S SOON GOING TO BE DEPOSED IN
A DEFAMATION CASE BROUGHT BY A
WOMAN WHO SAYS HE RAPED HER AND
WHO SAYS SHE SAVED A DRESS WITH
HIS DNA ON IT TO PROVE IT.
A COMPANY THAT WAS LINED UP TO
BROKER THE SALE OF HIS NOW
FLAGSHIP PROPERTY, HIS D.C.
HOTEL THAT COMPANY REFUSES TO BE
ASSOCIATED WITH HIM AND WILL
HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THE
SALE.
THE CITY WHERE HE WAS BORN AND
RAISED AND LIVED HIS WHOLE LIFE
BEFORE THE WHITE HOUSE, NEW YORK
CITY, HAS CANCELED ALL ITS TRUMP
ORGANIZATION CONTRACTS.
HE, OF COURSE, IN THE MIDDLE OF
HIS ONE TERM IN OFFICE SAID GOOD
RIDDANCE TO NEW YORK AND MOVED
TO FLORIDA, APPARENTLY OUT OF
SOME COMBINATION OF SPITE AND
TAX INTERESTS.
BUT EVEN STILL, HIS NEIGHBORS IN
PALM BEACH, FLORIDA, ARE ASKING
THAT TOWN TO ENFORCE ZONING AND
TAX RULES IN ORDER TO PREVENT
HIM FROM ACTUALLY MOVING IN
THERE FULL-TIME.
AND THE PGA WON’T PUT
TOURNAMENTS AT HIS GOLF COURSES
ANYMORE.
AND HE’S BANNED FROM TWITTER.
AND FACEBOOK.
AND YOUTUBE.
AND INSTAGRAM.
AND APPARENTLY THEY CAN’T FIND
ANYONE TO COME TO THE SORE LOSER
SENDOFF HE’S THROWING HIMSELF AT
DAWN ON HIS LAST MORNING AS
PRESIDENT AT AN AIR BASE AFTER
HE WAS VOTED OUT, AFTER ONLY ONE
TERM.
THE ONLY PRESIDENT IN U.S.
HISTORY TO HAVE EVER LOST THE
POPULAR VOTE TWICE, TO HAVE BEEN
IMPEACHED TWICE, THE ONLY
DEFEATED INCUMBENT PRESIDENT
EVER TO USE VIOLENCE BY HIS
SUPPORTERS TO ATTACK THE U.S.
GOVERNMENT TO TRY TO FORCE HIS
CONTINUED HOLD ON POWER.
HE LEAVES TOMORROW AT DAWN,
SLINKING OUT BEFORE THE
INAUGURATION OF THE MAN WHO
SOUNDLY BEAT HIM.
HE SNEAKS OUT EARLY TOMORROW AS
THE ONLY PRESIDENT IN LIVING
MEMORY TO FACE THE LEGITIMATE
PROSPECT OF POST-PRESIDENTIAL
CONVICTION IN THE SENATE.
AND A LIFETIME BAN ON HOLDING
OFFICE.
AND POTENTIAL FEDERAL AND STATE
CRIMINAL CHARGES IN THE COURTS.
OTHER THAN THAT, HOW WAS THE
PLAY, MR. PRESIDENT?
WAS IT WORTH IT?
IF YOU COULD HAVE SEEN, IF YOU
COULD HAVE GONE -- FIVE YEARS
AGO, COULD HAVE FAST FORWARDED
TO SEE ME SAY THAT ON TV, AND
IT’S ALL TRUE, IF YOU’D KNOWN
HOW THIS WOULD GO BY THE END OF
IT, WOULD YOU STILL HAVE DONE
IT?
YOU WILL GO DOWN IN HISTORY AS
UNEQUIVOCALLY AND INARGUABLY THE
WORST PRESIDENT IN AMERICAN