Good morning.
- When did you get here? - I spent the night.
But I remember you leaving before I went to bed.
You said, "Goodnight, I'm going home." And then you left.
Yeah, but then on my way out I tripped and fell down the stairs.
Oh my God. Were you hurt?
Nah, I just didn't feel like getting up, so I slept on the floor.
Hey, Gibby. You wanna be on iCarly?
- Totally. What do I gotta do? - I'll show you.
Put the foot in the mouth! You can do it!
I can't! I don't bend that way!
Put your foot in your mouth!
[alarm sounding]
What?
- You're having breakfast in class? - Uh-huh.
You can't just have breakfast in the middle of-- Is that turkey bacon?
What happened?
Carly! Look, Principal Franklin, it's my best friend Carly,
who loves me and see the value in me as a person.
Right, Carls? Tell the nice man.
- Tell him what? - I sent you a text.
Oh.
Sam did nothing wrong.
She didn't do the thing you're mad about.
She's not that kind of... girf.
- Girf? - Girl!
Well, you wrote 'girf'!
Oh, no.
And the other winner, who will share locker 239 with Freddie,
is Sam Puckett.
Ow! Oh, yeah!
Sam's a winner! Sam Puckett is a winner, yet again, Fredward!
[grunting]
My mom just had laser eye surgery this afternoon,
and she's coming to pick me up, so I gotta get outside.
This won't take long. I am prepared to offer you--
Wait, your mom had laser eye surgery today and she's driving a car?
I didn't say she makes good decisions.
And you're getting in the car with her?
I didn't say I make good decisions.
[horn honking]
There's my mom now.
Nice driving, Mom.
[screaming]
Yeah, baby! Mama wins!
I am the ultimate assassin! Woo!
Yes, can I help you?
I said I wanted hot sauce and there wasn't no hot sauce on my tray.
Sorry.
Here's some hot sauce.
You should have put it on my tray in the first place.
You know where I want to put it right now?!
You watch your mouth!
Hey, you watch your mouth before I put my fist in it!
Hey, hey, hey, hey! You say you're sorry to the customer!
- But he-- - Apologize.
I'm so very sorry.
[screaming]
Come here!
Come, come, come, come here.
Let me ask you this, do you want to keep this job?
No, but I need to!
[screaming]
Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah! Who's got my hat?
Oh, oh!
[screaming]
Oh, oh, look. Look at what mojo. Do you see this?
Oh, look at these fries.
Hey.
When did you... What are you doing here?
I was in the neighborhood, wanted food, didn't want to pay for it, here I am.
OK, for our first real iCarly cooking segment,
- we're gonna make... - Spaghetti tacos!
A dish invented by my brother Spencer.
Whose real name is Latisha McPeanuts.
Yeah, no it's not.
So, all you need to make spaghetti tacos are...
- Some taco shells. - Some spaghetti noodles.
- Noodles, noodles! - Noodles, noodles!
Our secret sauce.
And meatballs.
Where are the meatballs?
Right about here being dissolved by my stomach acid.
So what time is Pete meeting you here?
8:15.
Tell him where you're having dinner.
On his uncle's boat.
- Nice! - I know, I love boat food.
Uh-oh, here comes big sweaty trouble.
Hey, look here.
We got the whole iCarly gang.
Two ballerinas and their tech stooge.
She called me a tech stooge.
Ooh, fries.
Um, those are our fries.
Oh, right, sorry.
Here. You keep 'em.
[screaming]
Whoa!
[screaming]
Sam, you got her!
- Is that all you got? - Back off!
Tap out! Tap out!
[cheering]
Get out of here!
Out!
- You alright? - Yeah.
But uh...
- Hey. - Hi.
- Did you see what just... - Yeah.
Oh.
You were like, awesome.
[music playing]
[alarm sounding]
Mm.
I loves me the cold chili.