It’s the transfer market player clearance auction with Fabrizio Romano
Here we go!
-Ciao!
First up, Karim Benzema and he’s totally free
-Wait!!! Karim…
I want you to stay!
-I’m hearing Real have offered Benzema a new deal.
Up to him now!
-If you leave, it will be a disaster!
-Because you won’t have a striker?
-Worse than that!
-Worse than that?
-100 million times worse than that!
-How?
-Because the President says he’ll buy Kai Havertz
-Ha!
Fine I’ll stay!
-PHEW!
That was a close one!
-What on earth…
-SAUDI PRO LEAGUE!
-Adios Carlo!!!
-Karim!
-Saudi Pro League here I come!
-YA!
-KARIM!
HOW COULD YOU?!
KAI HAVERTZ!
NOT KAI HAVERTZ!
-Karim Benzema to the Saudi Pro League!
-Done deal and here we go!
-Kai Havertz…
-Next up, Ngolo Kante and he’s totally free!
-No wait!!!!
Ngolo…
Chelsea Franchise Club want you to stay!
-I’m hearing Chelsea have offered Kante a new deal.
Up to him now!
-If you leave, it will be a disaster!
-Why so?
-Pochettino says we need more goals, so I can’t let someone called Ngolo leave!
What?
Why are you both looking at me like that?
-Fine, I’ll stay!
-YEEHAW!
That was a close one!
-Holy cheeseburgers….
-SAUDI PRO LEAGUE!
-Au revoir Todd -Ngolo ngono!
-Saudi Pro League here I come!
-YA!
-NO!!!!
YOU JUST WAIT MR SHEIKH!
I’M GONNA GET MY FRIENDS BACK IN THE US TO BOMB THE SHIT OUT OF THE MIDDLE EAST FOR
THIS!
-Ngolo Kante to the Saudi Pro League!
Done deal and here we go!
-WAIT!!!!
YOU FORGOT TO BUY KAI HAVERTZ!!!!
PLEASE!
BUY KAI HAVERTZ!
-Next up, Ilkay Gundogan and he’s totally free!
-I’ll give you 500 million!
-ABU DHABI MADE UP LEAGUE!
-Woh girl!
-I said he’s totally free -Fine, 600m!
-Free means nothing!
-1 billion and that’s the Abu Dhabi made up league’s final offer.
-Er, done deal and here we go
-YES!
Tell Manchester City it was a pleasure doing business with them!
-Er, haven’t you forgotten something?
-Next up, Harry Maguire.
Do I hear any offers?
Any offers at all?
-Oh bugger…
-MR SHEIKH!
MR SHEIKH?!
Damn -Sorry Erik, the Saudi Pro League only seem
to want free transfers -Then we’ll let him leave for free!
-FLASH SALE!
Harry Maguire and he’s totally free!
-Mr Sheikh?
MR SHEIKH?!
-Sorry Erik, even the Saudi Pro League don’t want him
-Oh bbbugger.
The thought of beheading a skull that size probably scared them off.
-To be blunt, no-one in their right mind would want him on the wages he’s on.
-Enter Daniel Levy, from stage left!
A fwee you say?
-A fwee y- a free yes!
-Then Harry, Welcome to Spurs Harry!
-YES!
-Done deal and here we go!
Have the Spurs fans not suffered enough…
-And finally, Lionel Messi and he’s totally free
-Saudi Pro League!
-Not a chance…
I know that’s you Cristiano -What?
-You’re embarrassed you joined the Saudi Semi-Pro League so now you’re bank rolling
other players to join you out there To make you look less stupid
-Let’s go Junior!
YA!
-See you later Fabrizio I’m off to Miami
-Messi to Miami - done
deal and here we go!
-HAHA!
And Messi said the Saudi Pro League was embarrassing!