(Audience Cheering)
- Ugly ass little boy, hey, Ugly ass little boy
Ugly ass little boy, hey, Ugly ass little boy
- Silencio!
- Aye bruh do your thang bruh.
Do your thang, D.C., Do your thang.
- Is that suppose to be me?
- Do your thang bruh.
- You know what? Matter of fact, (beep) y'all.
He want to ask the question anyway.
(audience laughing)
Come on my boy, I told you I got you.
It's your debut, my boy. (D.C. laughing)
Boy, you boy, you told me you told me you had me boy.
(audience laughing)
Nick Cannon, what's up boy? Your music always have me dead.
(audience laughing)
- Whoo! Now that look (beep) (audience cheering)
Whoo!
- Do it again. Do it again.
- Woohoohoo. Okay any who, any who.
I like my wings with the bone in and skinless.
(audience laughing)
- Whoo.
- (Nick Cannon) Ask the damn question
- Whoo. (audience laughing)
- You about to get a buzzer.
- Ask the question.
- Yeah, Can I? Can I keep going? (audience laughing)
Congregation, Can I keep going?
(group cheers)
Whoo! (audience laughing)
- (Nick Cannon) Ask the question man.
- All right, all right, all right.
Here we go.
So you're in the bando cooking up some work, right?
- Okay
- Okay. You're handling your business.
Now you got 10 grams on the left,
and one kilo on the right. Which one is larger?
- 10 gram...uhhh
- Come on now.
- The kilo.
- No. (audience laughing)
- You wrong (beep). It's the 10,000 grams,
but any who, it's all good.
- You said 10 grams
(audience exclaims)
- You said 10 (buzzer dinging)
- Get your dumb ass over there D.C. (buzzer dinging)
- Whoo. (audience laughing and cheering)
♪ The Backseat of my ride. ♪
- ♪ The backseat of my ride. You got so much talent. ♪
- ♪ Backseat of my ride girl, you know you wilding. ♪
- ♪ Backseat of my ride, you know we stay styling. ♪
- ♪ Backseat of my ride, in you I'ma stay climbing. ♪
- ♪ Backseat of my ride, you leave me in stitches. ♪
- ♪ Backseat of my ride, Con, I get (beep). ♪
- ♪ Backseat of my ride, you know I stay spitting. ♪
♪ So sickening me and D.C. we do it so vicious. ♪
- ♪ It's like vicious, we so wicked. ♪
♪ You know how we gets it. My whole team winning. ♪
♪ You know what's happening girl, you know ♪
♪ I get sicky with it, get witty, jig it. ♪
♪ Picky picky, this sicky sicky, (beep) icky. ♪
♪ The Backseat of my Ride! Go Go ♪
♪ Backseat of my ride, Go Go, ♪
♪ the Back Seat Of My Ride! ♪
- ♪ Backseat of my ride it's season 17 ♪
- ♪ Backseat of my ride, I'm like, (beep) you mean. ♪
- ♪ Backseat of my ride. We going up y'all. ♪
- ♪ Backseat of my ride. ♪
- ♪ We don't give a (beep) y'all. ♪
- ♪ Backseat of my ride. It's D.C. ♪
- ♪ Backseat of my ride. ♪
- ♪ Yeah they see me. Mama we on TV. ♪
♪ Made you bad. You already know, cause you know ♪
♪ That I had to make you glad. Now listen. ♪
Aye. You know. (buzzer rings)
(audience cheers)
♪ Ugly ass little boy ♪
- Silence my minions!
(audience laughing)
- Can I cancel?
- Hell yeah you can.
- I said can I cancel?
- Hell yeah you can.
- I wanna cancel the people who canceled us.
Because they brought us back because
they knew we were the (beep).
(audience cheers) (buzzer dings)
- Give me Karlous Miller. Miller, I need you here.
No one other better than DC Young Fly.
I need you here ( audience cheering).
- (Nick Cannon) Let's go Fly. Let's get 'em boy.
- Karlous you ready?
- I'm ready.
- D.C. you ready?
- I'm ready.
(silly noises)
- D.C. If don't get your damn Jess Hilarious
when she take her makeup looking ass, up out of here.
- Boy your ass ugly as hell, boy your ass
baby oatmeal and apple sauce. Ugly ass boy.
- Boy if you don't get your damn,
ever thought of switching to Geico,
looking ass up outta here.
- Boy your ass look like everybody begging ass uncle.
(audience laughing) boy you don't got no...
- If you don't get your damn...
Those the same braids Nick threw away
three seasons ago looking ass up out of here boy.
- Boy, you know what you look like?
My left nut. Ugly ass boy.
- Boy if you don't get your damn tight pants
that came with a (beep) part wearing ass.
- Boy I know you aint talking about nobody.
Your voice sounds like, Justina's. Ugly ass.
- Boy if you don't get you damn
little bit of hair, little bit hair,
no beard having ass on the face, boy.
- Why your ass look like that (beep) get mad,
when the (beep) say he aint got no Black & Mild?
What you mean you ain't got no Black & Mild?
- Boy, if you... if you, don't get your damn
you look like the Black & Mild when you put it
out trying to light that bitch
again looking ass up out of here.
- Boy if you don't get your damn, I aint going
to buy a car if it aint damn less than an 86, ugly (beep).
- Boy if you don't get your damn baby braids
look like stitches on your head ass up outta here.
- Boy if you don't get your damn
I wasn't playing, these cost two new, ugly ass
(whistle blowing)(audience cheers)
- Keep going! Keep going!
(whistle blowing)
- Here's the first time in history.
Both of you guys are just doing incredibly too good.
So we're gonna get you two the both
up outta here. You both won. Back to your spots please.
(audience cheering)
New School, let's give the people what they're waiting for.
D.C. Young Fly, I need you here.
(audience cheers)
Old school?
- No.
- Give me the Tommy gun, Tommy.
- Let's go Tommy!
- Let's go OG. this is what you do.
- Man I can't roast you on TV. Damn Man.
Oh come on man.
Come on man.
(silly noises)
- Boy your ass look like you wear church socks
when you go swimming, ugly ass.
- With them Louis sneakers and them cornrows
your whole package is funky.
- Okay.
- Okay. But you happen to look
like Lamar Jackson if he was a monkey.
(audience exclaims)
- All right, look, when your ass played in Living Color.
It wasn't even color on the television, Ugly ass.
(audience laughing)
Everybody's in black and white.
(audience cheers)
(whistle blows)
- Tommy, you out.
(crowd chants)
(bell dings)
- Your scene is, Art Museum.
- I don't care. Call my mama man.
This field trip boring as (beep) anyway bruh.
(bell dings)
- A Bus Stop
- Bro where this (beep) at? Boy I just got this job man.
(beep) Never been late catching the bus.
(bell dings)
- Comedy Club
- Welcome to the 85 South Show. We in the Building!
- Aye man you know what time it is!
(bell dinging rapidly)
(audience cheering)
- A funeral casket.
- Damn man, here lies Justina's walls man.
- That's crazy. And they used her tracks to make the drapes.
- Damn!(bell dings)
- The scene is a jewelry store.
- I was just finna say I seen a bug
in this jewelry store. I'm an exterminator.
- (DJ) All right (bell dings)
- The scene is a drive-through.
- How you doing? Welcome to Chick-fil-A.
It's okay. Drive on down. Come on down.
Yes. Welcome to Chick. Hold that right there.
How you doing? Welcome to Chick-fil-A.
Yes, we're outside. We never go inside
Welcome to Chick-fil-A (bell dings).
- The scene is a Church.
- I want to welcome everybody
to the Wild 'N Out Baptist church. (panting)
And I know y'all have been seeing some things
but I'm here to tell ya (bell dinging)
- (Nick) There's a hater in the house, should we get him?
- (Crowd) Let's Get him.
- There's a hater in the house, should I get him?
- Let's Get him.
- Camera man, put it on my boy with the brown jacket.
Boy I'm on your ass boy. It's Cleveland
from The Cleveland Show. Ugly ass boy.
- There's a hater in the house, should I get him?
- Let's get him.
- Camera man, put the camera on Auntie in the green.
(crowd exclaims)
I'm on your ass, Ms. Cleo head ass
(beep) wrong with you, ugly ass girl?
How many wishes do you want?
- Your answer is, a mother from the hood would say this.
(buzzer rings)
- What is, I mean it's a roach but it's
in the Raisin Brand so you just
mix it up a little bit. It ain't going.
- I ain't never heard that one.
(buzzer sound)
Things your parents said but never did.
(buzzer dinging)
- That's nothing. Cause my mama raised me well.
Mama, you did everything baby!
(bell rings)
- Signs you're dating a Karen.
(buzzer dinging)
- What is, hell naw you brought mayonnaise to the barbecue.
(bell rings)
- Only a scammer would say this
(buzzer dinging)
- What is, hell naw, the bank froze your account?
Hell naw.(bell rings)
♪ Pick up and kill it, and kill it, and kill it ♪
- Your topic is 'Celebration'.
♪ Pick up and kill it, and kill it, and kill it ♪
- ♪ We celebrating. Y'all come let's party. ♪
♪ Matter of fact D.C. you get it started. ♪
- ♪ Imma get it started. Oh here go the cold. ♪
♪ Nick We appreciate 300 episodes! ♪
- ♪ 300 episodes wit Fat Joe. ♪
♪ Y'all know everything. I got that flow. ♪
- ♪ Uh huh, got that flow. You'll never be wack. ♪
♪ You done already said that. They had ♪
♪ to give your job back. cause you that (beep) ♪
♪ You already know you pull the trigger. ♪
♪ Yeah, you the one to turn everybody bigger. ♪
♪ Yeah to you, Imma salute that, new jack. ♪
♪ And I'm gonna stand here and I got your back. ♪
- ♪ Yo, he got my back. And I breathe that tight ♪
♪ and everybody know that D.C.'s so nice. ♪
♪ New school, old School, we gonna say this right. ♪
♪ Today's price is up, yesterday's driving. ♪
♪ Pick up and kill it, and kill it, and kill it. ♪
(bell dings)
- Your topic's, "School Subjects"
♪ Pick up and kill it, and kill it, and kill it. ♪
- ♪ Pick up and kill it, please don't you laugh. ♪
♪ My father sold drugs, so I'm good at math. ♪
- ♪ You good at math? So what little buddy ♪
♪ I'm skipping class, especially social studies. ♪
- ♪ Especially Social Studies, that packed a punch. ♪
♪ I'm skipping class and going to lunch. ♪
- ♪ Talking about lunch, boy you is scrambling. ♪
♪ I'm in the bathroom. (beep)I'm gambling. ♪
- ♪ You are gambling, boy, Spanish. ♪
♪ I love Latinos, so I'm going to Spanish. ♪
- ♪ uno, dos, tres, cuatro, cinco ♪
♪ seies, seite, ocho, nueve ♪
♪ Pick up and kill it, and kill it, and kill it. ♪
(bell dings)
♪ Pick up and kill it, and kill it, and kill it. ♪
- Your topic is Nick Cannon music.
♪ Pick up and kill it, and kill it, and kill it. ♪
- ♪ If we keeping score, I'm not a bore. ♪
♪ (beep) you, you know my music better than yours. ♪
- ♪ First of all, this topic is stupid. ♪
♪ I ain't never heard your music. ♪
- ♪ Never heard my music. Every beat on ♪
♪ this show, I produced it. ♪
♪ Okay, you heard it. You got worded. ♪
♪ And a matter of fact, I pay you so don't say a word bitch. ♪
- ♪ Okay. Ten and four, I heard gigolo. ♪
♪ Okay wait. I remember B2K. Uh-uh stop it. ♪
♪ The other one, I forgot it... I forgot it. ♪
♪ Pick up and kill it, and kill it, and kill it. ♪
(bell dings)
♪ Pick up and kill it, and kill it, and kill it. ♪
- Okay, the Queen Lisa Raye is so fly.
- How fly Is She?
- She listened to her sister music
with the volume off, because she signed to So So Def.
(audience laughing)
- (Cast Member) I see What you did there.
- My boy G-Eazy is so fly.
- How Fly Is he?
- My boy done made a song with everybody, except Nick.
(bell dings)
- Alright, old school Wild Out.
- Let's go, D.C.
♪Ugly Ass Little Boy ♪
- Silence my minions.
I am Lisa Raye's thoughts. (laughs)
Man (beep)! Boy your ass look like Tekashi 84.
Boy, I'm on your ass boy. (audience laughing)
(bell dings)
Here we go! New Jersey, turn up!
- Turn up for what!?
- I just checked my sperm count
and it says Nick Cannon!
(audience cheering)
(hip-hop music)
- You're fertile! You're fertile! You're fertile!
- New Jersey, Turn up!
- Turn up for what?
- Y'all ain't gonna believe who we got in here man.
It ain't about me. It's about my boy,
Buzz Lightyear, man. Turn up!
Oh my god, Buzz Lightyear, man!
(hip-hop music playing)
♪ To infinity and beyond, to infinity and beyond. ♪
- Aye JV, I always stay with a scheme
It's crazy that your name is G
When their ain't no G's on your team.
(audience shouting)
- Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on
- Yeah she said you got a G
- Talking about I ain't no G
and you think yo coochie is goodie.
- I knew you look familiar if that's Buzz Lightyear
(beep) you Woody.
(bell dings)
Listen Kid 'n Play it's finna get wicked
now what y'all did back in the day.
We'll never forget it. It was stupid tremendous.
I hope that you're listening. Now I'm the house party.
That's a beautiful vision. Now what y'all did?
Yeah, I'm gonna carry the mission.
I just want to pay my respect cause (beep) we winning.
(Applause)
- Oh good one.
(bell dings)
- That was the most gangsta compliment, I've ever heard.