With only eight days left until the midterm elections,
I could not be more excited to be here with you guys
in a state with so many crucial races.
And I'm not gonna lie. When we came down to Miami,
right, there was a part of us that thought
we were gonna take a vacation from the news, you know?
But then... but then the news followed us here.
We are following the breaking news.
The arrest in Florida of a suspect
in the series of bombs mailed around the country...
...investigators arresting 56-year-old Cesar Sayoc
this morning at a car shop in Florida.
NEWSMAN: This white van that had been surrounded
by the authorities now is being moved
on the Florida highway system.
Right now Sayoc is at a federal detention center in Florida
and expected to go before a federal judge in Miami
sometime on Monday.
-What the (bleep), Florida? -(laughter)
We came here to cover the midterms,
but then when we get here, all everyone is talking about
is the world's worst penpal.
What the (bleep) is that?
And just by the way, I know this doesn't sound like a compliment,
but we have to give props to the U.S. Postal Service, right?
-(cheering, whistling, applause) -Because just think about...
Because think about how carefully
they handled those packages for them not to explode on the way.
Huh? Like, if I was the post office,
I would be making ads about it. It would be like,
"The U.S. Postal Service-- we don't want to send bombs,
but if you do, we'll get them there."
(laughter)
That's a really good ad.
And it turns out, it turns out the bombs
didn't just come from Florida, right?
Uh, they were also sent by the most Florida man
you can ever imagine.
NEWSMAN: Sayoc's been working as a bouncer and sometime deejay
at a strip club in West Palm Beach.
NEWSWOMAN: One of his social media profiles lists him
as a booking agent for live entertainment.
He apparently also tried to be a stripper.
(laughter, whooping)
He tried to be a stripper?
(laughter)
He tried to be a stripper?
That is the saddest line I've ever heard in my life.
Like, it makes it sound like he got on stage
and he was so bad
that people started taking their dollar bills back.
Like, like, instead of making it rain,
it was the first time the strip club had a drought.
It was like, "Un-rain, un-rain, un-rain, un-rain, un-rain."
I mean, how do you fail at stripping in Florida?
This is the most stripper- friendly place in the world.
Like, you can make it as a stripper
even if you aren't trying out here.
Like, yesterday, I dropped my phone.
I leaned over to pick it up,
and someone stuck a dollar bill in my underwear.
(cheering)
In my underwear.
Now I'm doing three shows a night,
and I'm paying my way through college, that's what I'm saying.
So, so the FBI, the FBI caught the Florida man
who sent bombs to many prominent Democrats
and sent multiple bombs to CNN, right?
But the question remained, the question remained:
What drove him?
And to find out, we had to look at what he drove.
NEWSMAN: At the time of his arrest,
it appears this avid Trump supporter
may have been living in this white van,
a rolling political statement, covered with targets
of Trump's ridicule, many of the same people
who were sent parcel bombs this week.
The van also had a "CNN Sucks" sign
and photos of former secretary of state Hillary Clinton
in the crosshairs of a gunscope.
Okay, look, can I suggest something guys?
Um, I know America's never gonna agree on gun control,
but can we at least talk about van control?
No, because let's be honest, nothing good comes from a van.
Right? Can we accept that?
It's either pedophiles or kidnappers or bombers.
Like, a van is just basically a pickup truck
with something to hide.
Why do we still have vans?
And you may have noticed that, um, the stickers on the van,
all of the stickers on the van,
that a lot of them were trademarks of President Trump.
Yeah. It was like, "Lock her up."
"Fake news." "CNN sucks."
So, clearly, this guy was inspired by Trump, all right?
But according to Trump and his people,
this has nothing to do with him. Yeah.
It's just the actions of a mad man, you know?
And-and, yes. Yes, I mean, you know, it could be
that a mad man was inspired by your words.
But you've got to accept that there is some correlation there.
Right? I mean, if a mad man was running down the street
swinging nunchucks, screaming, "Cowabunga!"
I think the Ninja Turtles would be like,
"Oh. Oh. I think that guy was inspired by us.
"I think, uh... I mean, that's not what we wanted.
"We were all about the pizza, but, clearly, that guy, uh...
"You know, it has nothing to do with beating up black people.
"That's not what we were going for, but, uh,
we need to rethink our message," that's what they would say.
But instead, America's orange turtle has decided
it has nothing to do with him.
And not only has he decided that,
he decided to tweet this:
TV REPORTER: "The fake news media,
"the true enemy of the people,
" must stop the open and obvious hostility,
and report the news accurately and fairly."
Okay. So, uh, if you know that a phrase has been used
to encourage people to commit acts of violence,
if you know they're using that phrase,
why would you not stop using that phrase?
Why would you not just stop saying "enemy of the people"?
Like, you either want to encourage violence
or you don't care.
Why would you stop?
Why wouldn't you stop?
(cheers and applause)
'Cause I'm sorry, if the president of the United States
calls someone the "enemy of the people,"
don't be shocked when the people go after that enemy.
And I know Sarah Sanders is gonna come out
and she's gonna be like, "Oh, 'enemy' is just an expression.
The 'enemy of the people' is just an expression."
Well, then, why not just use another expression? Huh?
If you realize this one is dangerous,
why not use another one?
(cheers and applause)
There's a lot of ways to criticize someone
without going that far.
Try "poopy-head." Try that. That's a real phrase.
Yeah. He could just be like, "The press is a poopy-head."
Yeah. It works. It'll work.
It could work for Trump. He'd just be like,
(mimics Trump): "The press, poopy-head CNN.
So poopy, folks, so poopy."
It still works for me.
Less dangerous.
No one's gonna try to bomb poopy-head.
But "enemy of the people"? Come on, man.
Like, even the worst Yelp reviewer in the world
would never use that phrase.
Even the worst and angriest Yelp reviewer would never be like,
"These empanadas are the enemy of the people!
Two stars."