What was that moment where you figured out, what was the date, where you were like,
oh wow, I don't know shit. Oh, I mean, I don't know, since I was 13. No, I'm talking about
20 year old Tripp. Ok 20 year old Tripp. Okay. What was 20 year old Tripp doing?Oh, okay. Yeah,
I got something. Well, I am now in the real world. I'm 22, I'm fresh out of college.
Your social circle is not just baked in. You're out there. And so, I mean, the thing isI didn't
know what to do. I had no idea what to do. All I could do was drink alcohol to reduce the anxiety
to go over and approach a woman and the anxiety was so bad that it didn't even really work. The
alcohol barely made it easier to go over and talk to a woman. I remember too, when I was 22 I just
read the book, The Game by Neil Strauss three times. You read it? No, but I remember seeing it
a lot. It's the origin story. I'm not unique in that sense, it's the origin story for many men.
They found that book. Maybe not now, maybe now the origin story is finding Tripp Kramer.
I don't know, but back in the day, it was that book because that book told men, if you're not
a super good looking dude, and you're not really charismatic, there's actually ways to learn how
to attract women, even if you're a total nerd and you're catching all those Ls. So anyway,
fresh off of that book you could take some techniques from the book, and you can try them.
And so I would try them. And I tried them only maybe three times. Why three? Well because
I got rejected every single time. And not only did I get rejected,
they did the worst thing you could possibly think of... the slap or the drink in the face. Well,
no, not that bad. Oh, I mean, hey, you said bad. Well, let's just say if you get a technique from
online to use to attract a woman... They've heard it before.
They call you out. It doesn't feel so good. Is that a pickup line? Did you learn that from the
pickup artist? Legit got that three times - once in college at the end of college and then I was
like I can't use this stuff anymore. It did me no good. It may be outdated a little bit. And
then a couple more times. And what's funny, too, is I think a couple times when I tried something,
I wasn't even trying to technique. I literally was... yeah, I remember this. I was at Busbys.
Man, if anyone from LA who's been there for a while, they're gonna be like, wow, that's a crazy
reference. This place called Busbys. I don't know, maybe it's still around, Busby's West and Busby's
East. I went to Busby's East one night got super drunk just literally went up and talked to a girl
didn't use any technique anything. She still was like, is this from the pickup artist? I was like
what? So now if I just go up and talk to a woman I'm gonna get called out for it? Because you're
trying to pick her up. It's just, you know. I don't know. I don't remember exactly what
I said or what I did. But at that point, I was like alright, this is not working. So you know
what I did? What does any man do when he tries to meet women in person and it doesn't work?
He goes online. Does more research. At least this is what you did in 2005. I was gonna say, I had
to think about it. I was like what did I do when I tried to pick up girls and it didn't work? I don't
know if you can imagine a time when it didn't work. Absolutely. Tripp. Tripp. Okay. So you
know I'm a nerd. Imagine a 20 something year old Mario, 22 year old Mario, very nerdy, still nerdy,
high school nerdy, been nerdy. Don't worry about the athletic thing. Yes, I was also an athlete,
but I was very nerdy. I didn't probably come into... Were you popular in high school?
No. But you were an athlete. Yeah, most athletes are popular in high school. I was a nerd. They
knew me, but that's not the same. Unless you were a mathlete. That too, but you know it's
different. It's not the same when you're just a straight up athlete but you're also a nerd that's
also an asshole sometimes. It's just who I was. I don't think I came into my own as far as really
understanding how to talk to girls until maybe, shit bro, like 25. But I already tasted a little
bit of success. I'd already had professional success and worked with a lot of women.
I stopped taking myself so seriously. You know, I started having fun just joking talking shit
and I realized something really quickly. It's huge. It didn't matter what I looked like,
or you know what my career status was. Was I fucking fun to be around, did I just say silly,
did I take myself too seriously? Take yourself seriously career wise, get your shit together,
pay your bills. But in random conversation and banter, I would often, you know,
make jokes. Not necessarily demeaning myself, but I can take a joke, but I can give one back. And
what I've learned with women man, if you can take a joke, give one back and she gives you another,
it's sexy. Women think that's sexy when they can have a moment to be funny with you. Because man,
we think we're funny all the time. So if we want to go back to nerdy I would call
that tension. Exactly. And you know about tension too much. I listen to you talk about tension and
I laugh all the time in my head, because that is the number one way I get girls. Other than muscles
obviously. Yeah, and muscles help. Let's be honest. Yeah, they help. Well, first of all,
I didn't have muscles. I still don't really have muscles. You're doing good. I'm working on it. And
I wasn't building any tension. I was, if we were friends, if I was friends with a guy or a girl,
I'd be fun. People would like me. That I had. But the initial... You get me with a stranger,
an attractive female stranger. There's no tension. Boring AF. You know what I would do? Oh my god,
this is a story. Hit me go on hit me. So when I was 21 years old, I'm a junior in college, I
was in a fraternity, I cringe but it's also a good story because it reminds me of what guys shouldn't
do. So I'm 21 years old, it's the first semester of junior year. It's exciting you're a junior,
you're now the oldest person in the fraternity. You're one of the older people in college.
And you're still like in the scene. Because when you're a senior you're still in the scene
but you're kind of like alright, I'm almost out of here. Yeah sernioritis hits you really hard. Yeah,
exactly. You don't live in the frat anymore. You're just kind of in your own little world.
But I feel like the juniors a little bit more the king of... where like a senior
in high school is the king, I feel like the junior. Anyway, I felt that energy.
And it was the first semester and I thought you know okay, like I'm cool, I'm a little cool.
Started to dress a little better. Got contacts which made me feel more confident.
And now all these cute girls because it's the very beginning of school arecoming over to the
fraternity to pre during. So what did I do when all these cute girls are coming over to pre drink?
You drink. Well yes, I did drink and I also did not talk to a single one. What?
You were a junior. They're coming to talk to you. So I was in denial and in the wrong mindset
thinking okay, again, this is just delusion, a complete delusion. I was too cool like the
girls will come to me. Like what? I love that guy. That's my favorite guy. It was so false,
so wrong and also obviously covering up just being nervous to talk to girls. I thought I gotta
play it cool. That's what I thought, I had to play cool. You know not go over to them
right away. Okay, girls come in and I eventually did talk to some of them. But it
took like, I don't even know. I have no memory of it. I have lots of memories of not talking to
them. So I'm sure it eventually kind of happened but even from that nothing really happened.
I mean there'd even be nights where it didn't happen like I would see them come in and like
I would be there and be like I'm too cool to talk to them. It'll just kind of happen. I don't want
to show, I don't want to be too needy or something and then they'd just leave and it's like ah shit
well maybe I'll see him at the bar, I don't know. Wow have I learned. It's like you know
who the person who gets girls does? They go talk to girls. They go talk to girls, they literally
do the exact opposite. They play leader. Hey, what's going on? I haven't met you girls yet.
Where are you from? Who do you know here? Oh, cool. Awesome. Come inside. Let's get a shot.
Initiating the conversation. Yes being part of the conversation. Yes. Being part of
conversation is great. But when you initiate the conversation and it's a good vibe off the first
five words, it don't even have to be complex, just like oh, what's up how you doing? It's not like
oh, so hey, what's up? How you doing? Same words, different approach. But you know what? Both are
even just good enough. Better than what I did. Cause you didn't do anything. Talk about the L,
I didn't do anything. And if you're not on their radar nothing's gonna happen. I know
it sounds like when I say it, it's like, duh. But in the moment it wasn't duh. That was just
my reality. You're nervous. You don't know any of these people. In general, we are nervous to like,
we're nervous to meet new people anyway, to have that first interaction with new people. You add
the attraction factor I mean, now you're like, I just don't want to fuck this up. And it's like...
And then it's five girls instead of one and that always gets more tough too because it's
more intimidating to talk to a group of people, or a group of attractive women. The cool thing about,
you know, being the host of a party, because I know a lot of, there may be some people that are,
you know, in frats right now. You're the host. Yeah, you're the host. Be the host, simple. It's
like I talked about in a recent. Remember? Yes, you went to a party early and it wasn't your
party but you met everyone before as people came in. And I didn't act like the host. Hey, welcome
to the party. What's going on? Grab a drink. I was there. But I was very active and exhibiting
leadership type host like qualities where that's significantly more attractive. And that's,
and this is a tangent on a different topic. It's interesting when you do that and you meet other
guys and you're introducing each other at a party and you never met each other before.
Girls see that too. And you instantly stand out a little bit as the approachable person because
you just met all of these dudes and not even like in a what's up bro whatever. Just like yo,
come on in. Like everybody's having a good time. Here's a drink. Here's a drink. And it's just like
you're initiating and kind of guiding and creating the energy for the entire party. Yeah. Now that is
a trick that I still use to this day. Yeah, it's powerful. I did it in LA. I was like, I don't know
any of these dudes, but I'm gonna tell a whole bunch of jokes. We're just gonna have a good
time. Now, obviously, that flows into everybody's feeling good so if everybody's confident then now
everybody can talk to girls because everybody's feeling good. That's how you do the fraternity
style dating thing is that you have to have that one initiator kind of get everybody ready,
prepped like a coach. Sure yes. Like Tripp Kramer at Tripp Advice.com. But that's the thing is
it doesn't matter whether you're at a frat
or a party, or you go alone to a bar, or you're on a first date, like all the interactions with women
are going to be better and you will build more attraction if that's what you're doing. Yeah. And
women just don't like wallflowerss. They want to be with the man, the man in charge.