This super creepy guy posted an ad on Craigslist
saying he would play folk music buck naked for parties of young women
I called him up as Buk Lao the head of a sorority to see if he'd be willing to perform for our kinky party
It turns out this guy was down for absolutely anything and he was weirder than I could have ever imagined check it out
*rings*
Hello?
I see your advertisement about dancing for the folk music, right?
Dancing?
this is Onaji, I sent you the email about that
oh yeah
Yeah, actually we have a sorority here for the Kappa Kappa Gamma
What do you have there is a sorority, is this a house you are talking about?
yeah its a house over there so I wanted to see, you know, could I have some music dancing
people are going to be drinking, hanging out having a good time, conversing- that kind of thing
How many women would be there, do you think?
Probably like 55, something like that
50 women?
And let me tell you, there are some beautiful college girls you know
So it's going to be quite nice, you know. A lot of eye candy, that kind of thing
So what do the women want to do? They just want me to strip or they want to kiss me or what?
Yeah they want you to strip and kind of play around with you a little bit you know?
While your singing, you're going to be rocking out with your cock out! Right?
Oh yeah, yeah. They you can play, they can play with me if they want to.
Okay, but do you have like a Viagra or the cialis? So that way it can stay hard?
Yeah, I can bring something, yeah.
Yeah, okay. Just because otherwise we have like a pharmacy here you know?
We have all kind of medication in case,
I just want you to be hard for 10 hours
You know? We need like a big stick, right?
Yeah, I'm like 10 inches so that would be good.
Oh yeah, that's going to be great! We actually have horse shoes here too, so we might play with it
*groans* yeah that sounds good.
Yeah, its like a silicone horse shoe, right?
Throw it on your penis- you understand?
Yeah, okay. Yeah its cool.
Okay, but you're not like a crazy right
Because I can't have like a crazy psycho killing rapist coming to the house you know? So-
No, no, no, no *laughs* Not me.
So do you party at all or do you supervise this, or what?
I'm going to party to man! I'm going to get down. I'm going to suck so much dick that night
It's going to be great.
Oh good, good. Yeah good.
Yeah, all right. Yeah
We would love to kind of see what kind of things you're open to I'm down to pay extra like we just have some really
Crazy-it's gonna be a really really hot girls that kind of thing like one lady, she loves watermelon- you know?
So maybe it would be great if I could cut a hole in it and you could put your penis inside- you know?
So these girls they like to- like you suck or jerk me off or whatever?
Yeah, yeah for sure. Honestly you should be paying me for this *laughs* right?
Yeah, that would be good. Yeah.
Yeah, okay. I will be in touch with you-
just keep an eye out for my phone call, but thank you so much for that time and
Take care of yourself, and that dingdong okay, okay?
Okay I'll see you, bye.
Dude that shit was the weirdest phone call I didn't even know where to like
*laughs* this guy
He ended up emailing me a bunch of super creepy naked pictures of himself
I called him up a couple of days later as Tyrone, another performer at this sorority party who he'd be dancing with
*rings*
Hello?
This is Tyrone. I was told that you would be the performer going to the sorority party.
Oh, yeah, right.
When can we meet up to like plan the choreography?
Yeah
oh, you mean like ahead of time?
Yeah, because we have like costumes, we have to coordinate that kind of thing.
What kind- what do you mean, what kind of costumes? She didn't tell me anything about that.
Oh, well like just like a little playful stuff
I got a few different like socks and stuff like that, like Haynes and Puma
I have some dress socks
At some point we are going to be dressing up like a cowboy
other times we're just going to be putting socks on our dicks and clockwise twirling that bitch
Yeah, she told me something about a watermelon and other stuff-
Oh yeah!
she was talking so fast, I didn't know
Oh yeah
That's right. Dog like three weeks ago, she got me a mini watermelon
I was able to put half of my penis up in there.
I think this time they're going to get those jumbo bitches from Costco or something like that
Yeha okay, so you put your dick in a watermelon for what? What happens? Because I never did that.
Well then it kind of like hangs out-
Then you try to like keep it elevated
like a motherfucking pendulum and like they just get a real kick out of it, and then after you pull your dick out
After you pull your dick out they pour some Ciroc up in there. Bitches start slurping, so it's like a drink
Okay
That's pretty wild
Like I am telling your dog these asian girls that get down don't like you know
Everybody gets in there with a straw you know what I'm saying? Like Slirp Slirp.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, and she said something about a back room too maybe?
It's more like like a dungeon,than a back room
I guess they could give me tips back there too then.
yeah, do you like whips?
Yeah, whips are okay
Just like whips and chains, that kind of thing
yeah, wait the girls whip you?
they like to chain you up and like kind of just point at your dick
and then be like oh my God look at your penis *laughs*
And they laugh at your ass.
Okay
She said she has a pharmacy there too for all kinds of pills.
Oh yeah. Yeah, they got all sorts of stuff man
So like they've got Viagras, they've got Cialis, they have pain killers up in that bitch
They got Tylonol, they have Zicam-
Wow
They have allergy pills in case you are feeling really sniffy
Do they smoke grass too?
Yeah they smoke a little bit right like those Asian girls like they take one little hit man
They get some motherfucking second hand smoke and still fucking giggling all over the place so-
Well that sounds like a cool place, then I guess they have-
50 you're saying probably 40 or 50 women there, so I should be able to make some money gear not for so many
Yeah for sure it's gonna be great. So like I said I'm going to go ahead and just kind of figure out the next steps
I'm going to go ahead and call her up now
kind of line up the plan and follow up with you okau?
Yeah, yeah, you just tell me give me the address and the time and you know I'll meet you there
You know what I mean
Alright brother Toodles.
Bye
What a fucking weird specimen. Oh my God I couldn't end the prank
I had to leave it open-ended in case I call him back
Oh my God dude this guy
as you can see he was so down for anything that it almost felt impossible to weird him out
I decided it was time to blow his buzz by doing this
*rings*
Hello?
Yeah. Hey this is Russell. I'm actually an investigator with NYU
We had quite of a weird
issue here on campus lately
And we think you may have been a victim of it
I wanted to quickly just ask you-
get you on the phone and see if you've got any weird phone calls from any students on campus lately?
You're an investigator for NYU?
We recently busted a sex trafficking ring here on campus and included a large
amount of men who were catfished on
Craigslist to come to a certain event and then come perform or come participate in a party of some sort
And they ended up being held captive and then a whole slew of other things
So there was a dungeon here and their makeshift basement. It was quite. There's quite a scary ordeal
Were you possibly, you know hit up by any of these individuals?
No I wasn't I just got a you know wrong number, but I mean you know what so what happened?
What do you mean the NYU found out about it or something?
Yeah-
Basically there were some people held captive like I said there was a dungeon in the basement and there were men locked in cages
It was it was very Barbaric it was very strange and
But the call, the calls were traced to one student here her name is Onaji.
It's an Asian American student
You know we had many men here captive for for several weeks, so that's extremely frightening, you understand?
Well, good luck to you. Whatever you're looking for yeah, no, sorry I can't help you
I just wanted to make sure you know? Because you got maybe a wrong number call because we did subpoena the phone records
and we saw that there was a 25 minute conversation with with this number
Well I don't remember unless I left it off the hook
and I don't know what happened.
I just don't want you to be the one ending up on a hook if you know what I'm saying
So did you remember at all what the context that that conversation might have been?
No, I just you know somebody was looking for George, and I said you know he's not here
I got you, so for 25 minutes. You might have talked about George
No, I don't know I wasn't on the phone that long with them
Oh okay
You know I just- don't know how that happened.
Let me go ahead and just put some notes here on your files to say that this is a miss like you weren't contacted just
Say they don't bother you again hopefully and then but I do appreciate you letting me know again
I'm just looking out for you here. I hope you understand why I'm calling
I'm not calling you're not any trouble, you didn't do anything wrong anything like that
I just wanted to you know make sure you're safe. Everything's okay. You understand okay?
Okay Thanks! Bye.
All right take care, bye.
I called him back the next day to see if he was still down to come to the party
after what he'd heard from Detective Russell Johnson. Here's what happened.
*rings*
Hello?
Yeah man! What's up? It's me. Are you excited for tonight?
Yeah well some guy called. He said that uh
he was investigating you and and the place because he said you put the guys in dungeons or jails or something there in the dungeon and
And he said it's a you know a big scam
No, no, no. There's somethings like a B.S.M. right?
They say B.S.M. right? Like a B-BSM
I don't know how he got your phone number
but he knew that I talked to you on the phone for 25 minutes
He had my phone number, and I said I don't know anything must have been a wrong number and he said well
Why were you on the phone for 25 minutes, and I said I don't know I guess I didn't hang up the phone
Sir, we have been tapping the line
We have a full recording of the conversation
When I asked you you explicitly told me that you did not know who was calling and it was a wrong number for 25 minutes
You know can we get to the bottom of this just like what's happening here
Right, well I want to talk to the woman.
Yeah, well-
Who the fuck is that, who did you put on the telephone?
Listen ma'am. I'm just gonna get off the phone.
I'll go ahead and handle the rest of this
What do you mean get off the telephone this is my conversation
*hangs up* ... sir?
Thank you for watching everybody wasn't that shit crazy?
Nothing phased that guy! Smash that like button down below if you enjoyed.
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