( APPLAUSE ) >> JAMES: WELCOME BACK.
NOW, WE LIKE TO PLAY A GAME HERE CALLED "WERE YOU PAYING
ATTENTION," WHERE I QUIZ PEOPLE IN THE AUDIENCE ON THINGS THAT
HAVE HAPPENED JUST MOMENTS AGO IN THE SHOW.
NORMALLY, POST-SHOW, OUR STAFF WILL MOCK
THOSE AUDIENCE MEMBERS FOR NOT BEING ABLE TO REMEMBER SOMETHING
THAT LITERALLY JUST HAPPENED IN THIS VERY STUDIO.
OFTEN THEY'RE, LIKE, CRANKY.
HOW HARD IS IT?
SO, TONIGHT I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE FUN TO SEE HOW WELL THEY FARE
AT THIS GAME.
THEY DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS.
THIS IS "WERE YOU PAYING ATTENTION: LATE LATE SHOW STAFF
EDITION."
♪ ♪
♪ >> James: YEAH, THAT WAS A
LESS ENTHUSIASTIC CRAP, WASN'T IT?
THEY'RE LIKE -- REALLY?
IT'S PRETTY SIMPLE.
I'M GONNA QUIZ MEMBERS OF OUR STAFF-- PEOPLE IN THIS ROOM--
ABOUT THINGS THAT HAVE HAPPENED SO FAR IN THIS SHOW.
IF THEY ANSWER RIGHT, THEY GET A PRIZE.
IF THEY ANSWER WRONG, THEY HAVE TO DROP WHAT THEY'RE DOING AND
LEAVE THE STUDIO IMMEDIATELY.
IT'S A BIT OF FUN!
( LAUGHTER ) THE EXCITEMENT IN THE ROOM IS
PALPABLE, SO LET'S GET STARTED.
LET'S BEGIN WITH SUSAN.
HOW'S YOUR DAY GOING?
HOW ARE YOU FEELING, SUSAN?
>> A LITTLE NERVOUS NOW.
>> James: A LITTLE NERVOUS?
FOR PEOPLE WHO DON'T KNOW, WHAT IS YOUR JOB MERE ON "THE LATE
LATE SHOW."
>> I DO AUDIO THINGS AND, AMONG THEM, I MIC YOU.
>> James: YOU DO?
YES.
>> James: EVERY DAY.
AND I HAVE TO SAY THIS, AND I'M GOING TO SAY THIS RIGHT NOW, AND
TO BE CLEAR, I DON'T WANT THIS TO BECOME A THING, I'M NOT GOING
TO BE NICE ABOUT EVERYONE.
( LAUGHTER ) BUT I WILL SAY TODAY IS SHOW
800, AND FROM SHOW NUMBER ONE, SUSAN, I DON'T THINK, HAS ANY
IDEA HOW HER CALMNESS AND JOY HAS BROUGHT A SENSE OF CALM AND
JOY TO ME FOR EVERY SINGLE SHOW, AND I MEAN THAT, SUSAN.
( APPLAUSE ) YOU ARE AMONG THE ABSOLUTE BEST.
>> THANK YOU.
>> James: BUT IF YOU GET THIS WRONG, YOU'RE GONE.
>> OKAY.
>> James: FIRED.
NO MORE.
OKAY?
THAT'S NOT TRUE, YOU WON'T BE FIRED.
LEGALLY, WE LOOKED INTO IT, WE'RE NOT ALLOWED TO.
BUT SUSAN, HERE IS YOUR QUESTION.
AT THE END OF THE MONOLOGUE, WHAT ITEM DID I USE FROM THE
DRAWER IN MY DESK?
>> HAND SANITIZER.
>> James: LET'S HAVE A LOOK AND SEE IF SUSAN'S RIGHT.
SUSAN, YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!
YOU'RE A VALUED MEMBER OF STAFF.
YOU'VE EARNED YOUR KEEP.
HERE YOU WILL GET THIS $50 BOTTLE BLUE CARD.
BUT COME GET IT SO YOU CAN REMAIN ALER THROUGHOUT THE SHOW,
NOT TOO CLOSE.
WELL DONE SUSAN!
ABSOLUTELY CORRECT!
SUSAN!
ALL RIGHT.
WHO SHALL WE GO TO NEXT?
LET'S GO TO ROB.
ARE YOU GOOD?
>> I WAS GOOD.
>> James: NOW, ROB, EXPLAIN TO PEOPLE AT HOME, WHAT DO YOU DO
HERE AT "THE LATE LATE SHOW"?
>> I'M IS COORDINATING PRODUCER FOR THE SHOW.
>> James: COORDINATING PRODUCER.
>> YEAH.
>> James: SO REALLY SOMEONE WHO SHOULD BE PAYING A LOT OF
ATTENTION.
>> YEAH.
>> James: ONE MINUTE HE'S COORDINATING, THE NEXT
PRODUCING.
EVERY NOW AND THEN -- POOF!
DO YOU THINK YOU HAVE BEEN PAYING ATTENTION DURING THE
SHOW, ROB?
>> YEAH, MOSTLY.
>> James: BE HONEST, HAVE YOU EVER ZONED OUT DURING A SHOW?
>> NO, BUT I'VE TAKEN MY FOCUS ON TO OTHER, MAYBE TOMORROW'S
SHOW OR SOMETHING.
( LAUGHTER ) >> James: THAT IS SUCH A BULL
( BLEEP ) ANSWER.
NO, NO, I MAY HAVE ZONED OUT OF THIS SHOW BUT ONLY BECAUSE I'M
ZONING INTO OTHER SHOWS.
( LAUGHTER ) NOW, ROB, THIS IS AN EASY ONE,
OKAY?
I'M GOING TO READ YOU A VERSE FROM LIKASON WHICH YOU JUST
HEARD NOW AT THIS DESK.
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS GIVE ME THE MISSING APP THAT I NAMED AT
THE END.
OKAY?
MESSAGE ME ON GROUP ME, GWINNETT ME ON GOOP ME, CANCEL MY RES ON
OPEN TABLE, BETRAY MY -- WHAT.
>> TRUST ON CANE AND ABEL?
>> James: HE'S GONE WITH BETRAY MY TRUST ON CANE AND
ABEL.
LET'S SEE IF HE WAS RIGHT.
MESSAGE MOW ON GROUP ME, GWINNETT ME ON GOOP ME, CANCEL
ME RES ON OPEN TABLE, BETRAY MY BROTHER ON CANE AND ABEL.
OOOH!
JUST FOR THE MOMENT HE ZONED OUT FROM THIS SHOW AND STARTED
THINKING.
OH, BROTHER, WHAT'S ON THURSDAY'S SHOW AND HE'S GONE?
NOW, NORMALLY, YOU'RE PAID ATTENTION.
WHAT DO WE NORMALLY GET THE AUDIENCE TO DO DURING THIS
SEGMENT?
>> WE'D HAVE TO SING ON OUR WAY OUT.
>> James: THAT'S RIGHT, BUT BECAUSE OF COVID RESTRICTIONS,
WE'RE NOT GOING TO GET YOU TO SING.
YOU'VE GOT TO DANCE YOUR WAY OUT OF THE STUDIO.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THE DANCE YOU MUST CREATE ON YOUR WAY OUT.
♪ ♪
♪ YOU LOVE THE DOUGIE.
MUSIC, PROP, LE WE'LL SEE YOU LATER!
WHOO!
♪ ♪
♪ OH, MY GOD!
OH, MY GOD!
THAT WAS SENSATIONAL!
UNBELIEVABLE!
LET'S TRY ONE MORE PERSON.
LET'S GO TO PETE.
( LAUGHTER ) PETE, THAT'S THE BEST -- PETE,
COME ON.
PETE, YOU'VE NEVER LET ME DOWN.
FOR ANYONE AT HOME WHO DOESN'T KNOW, WHAT DO YOU DO ON THE
SHOW.
>> JUST TRY AND STAY FOCUSED, BOSS.
>> James: JUST FOCUSED ON THE CAMERAS.
PETE, I ASKED ROB THIS QUESTION, DO YOU EVER FIND YOURSELF WHEN
YOU'RE ON CAMERA ZONING OUT AT ANY POINT?
>> YOU'RE TALKING TO A CAMERAMAN, BOSS.
( LAUGHTER ) >> James: IT'S A MIRACLE IF
YOU'RE ZONED IN.
LET'S BE HONEST.
>> I'M LOOKING AT WHAT I FEEL LIKE.
>> James: PETE, DO YOU FEEL CONFIDENT YOU CAN DO THIS?
>> ABSOLUTELY NOT.
>> James: WELL, LET'S FIND OUT.
PETE, HERE'S YOUR QUESTION, IN THE MONOLOGUE, I MENTIONED THE
NAME OF MICHAEL COHEN'S NEW TELL-ALL
BOOK.
WHAT IS THE FULL NAME OF THAT BOOK?
>> "BETRAYAL: AN INSIDER'S -- >> James: LET'S SEE IF YOU'RE
RIGHT.
THERE IS, I'M SORRY, PETE, YOU'VE LET ME DOWN, THE CAMERA
CREW DOWN, IT IS TIME TO DANCE YOUR WAY STRAIGHT TO THE PARKING
LOT, AND LET'S BE HONEST, PETE, YOU CAN PROBABLY GO HOME NOW.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THE DANCE YOU MUST CREATE.
♪ ♪
♪ PETE, LET'S HAVE MUSIC, CASEY
LIGHTS, PETE, DANCE YOUR WAY OUT OF HERE!
LET'S GO!
OH, YES!
GO, PETE!
♪ ♪
♪ SOME PEOPLE ARE PAYING
ATTENTION, SOME ARE NOT.
WHEN WE COME BACK, HILARY SWANK'S GOING TO BE HERE.
COME ON BACK, EVERYONE!