Thumbnail! Hah!
Hey YouTube World. It's me, Evelyn,
Happy Valentine's day and welcome to my weekly Q & A series.
It's a series I'm gonna post every, uh, you know, seven ish days.
I ain't got a day.
It's not going to be the same day every week,
but every week I will post a video like this where in the middle of doing
something else, I'm filming a video for something else.
I will be answering one of y'alls questions and in this inaugural,
vocab, Q & A video,
I will answer your questions about love.
Are we together? Okay. Alright. First things first.
I'm going to put my hair up. This is a silk press. Um, shrinkage.
So I'm going for a soft glam look
and I'm not going to talk about any of the products I'm using cause I don't know
what I'm doing, all right first question,
I'm going to hide their identity for privacy purposes. Uh, and they ask:
So I like this guy since the seventh grade,
I'm now 30. Should I finally talk to him? Child!
Yes.
So you mean to tell me that y'all have been passing each other in the same
Kroger's since y'all was 12? And you haven't talked to this boy,
this man, next time, I'm trying to find foundation!
This is not my color.
Okay. I'm gonna need you to go to Kroger. Find him in the cereal aisle.
I just made up a whole storyline in my head.
You need to talk to him because I need you to realize he sucks sooner than later.
Statistically speaking, this not going to be your dream.
Your dream guy.
You have a 12 year old crush mentality about this person and this person is 30
years old. This person got student loans maybe or loans.
Just loans.
I know someone's going to be in the comments like Evelyn is just going at her
face, but I be rough with it. You know what I'm saying?
Right there. That doesn't even match. Oh no.
You need to break the spell. Oh God.
So you can get to know them for who they actually are right now versus who you
felt they were when y'all was 12 child,
when y'all was 12. This person asked,
what's the best thing to put in a dating app bio?
The best thing to put in a dating app bio is what you're looking for and what
you are not looking for. Because here's the thing,
they're not going to read it anyway, but at least you put it in your bio.
If it says I'm looking for something casual, I'm looking for wifey
Okay, put it in there.
You need to be honest.
I also think it's good to put where like they might find you.
You know like you can find me like in a bookstore or you know,
you can find me, um, in the dog park,
but try to stay away from stereotypes like I live in Austin,
Texas and so anybody who puts like I love tacos.
is just like we get it like duh.
Who doesn't like tacos? Matter of fact, in your bio put,
if you don't like tacos, swipe, swipe the other way.
You should talk about your experiences on the apps.
You know, make a joke state your intentions.
You should say things like if you don't like messaging on the app and
you just want to go straight to text, say that I don't really chat on here.
Meet in real life or nah.
Otherwise you going to be in DM limbo.
I mean, you can
throw a scripture verse in there. Proverbs 21 woman,
I'm not the one. Hope that helped. Onto the question!
Thoughts on long distance relationships?
Long distance relationships suck. Okay,
Whoa. Oh, thumbnail.
Oh my God.
I think that if you're not willing to try a long distance relationship,
you didn't really like them that much.
Hear me out. You don't have to like long distance relationships.
What I'm saying is that a relationship is about trying.
It's about working with someone,
collaborating with someone to build a life.
If you are not willing, like can't even have the conversation,
you must not really value them
as someone who could potentially be in your life longterm. Oh,
I don't know how y'all do it. I want to spray this with something.
It's worth a conversation. This is probably backwards.
I don't know what's going on here with this eye look.
It was supposed to be soft glam.
I do not think that you should be in a long distance relationship if you're
casually dating someone, if you're just there for a good time,
not a long time for the vibes for funsies if you,
you know,
enjoy companionship kinda, mmm long distance is not for you because long distance
relationships comes with a set of standards,
a set of rules that you two have to agree on.
You know what I'm saying? A set of expectations.
I think they put the lighter color in the middle, like that
Dimension.
In a previous video I said that the biggest issue in all relationships is unmet
uncommunicated expectations and when you are in a long distance relationship you
have to communicate those expectations. I think I did something
and so, ohh the fallout, Oh my,
it's all over my face. Okay. Oh no.
I shouldn't have put foundation on yet. That's why they do that.
Do you expect to talk every night, every other night?
Weekends?
How are you going to decide who goes to see who, is it dependent on who makes
more money and can afford the transportation cost?
Is it decided on who has a job that allows them to take days off?
You know,
cause you don't want to have this thing where it's like "you never come see me and
I always come see you." You have,
you want to set that up and create that, form
that understanding ahead of time. If you got trust issues,
if you got jealousy issues,
if you, oh and then you can also have a conversation about what does a long
distance relationship mean? Okay. This is too hard.
It's too hard to multitask like this.
So I'm going to finish my look and come back and share my thoughts completely.
Yes
Oh yeah, yeah. Give them what they want girl.
Anyway. In my experience,
long distance relationships put people to the test.
I don't know that there is a way for it to feel balanced all the time.
It's also different personalities coming together.
If you're someone who doesn't miss people,
if you don't see someone regularly,
but if the other person needs quality time,
you know, oh love languages.
I'm making a video on love languages in the next couple of days,
so stay tuned for that.
But if y'alls love languages are impacted by the distance,
then your relationship will be impacted by the distance.
If your love language is physical touch,
that's when folks be cheating.
That's when folks be cuddled up watching Cheer on Netflix at So and So's house.
That didn't happen to me,
but being in a long distance relationship can make you feel like
you're wasting your time sometimes it makes you feel a lil,
it makes you feel a little absurd that all these people in your vicinity and you
had to choose the one that's going to leave or you had to be the one to leave.
You know what I'm saying?
It feels like forcing yourself to struggle when you don't have to struggle,
and that's why I understand why people don't want to enter in long distance
relationships because it's difficult for no reason other than you chose it.
Part of having that conversation is saying, hey
if it doesn't work out,
then it doesn't work out. And that's a tough one to talk about,
especially if you've been in a, in that relationship for some time already.
If it's distance is the reason that we're breaking up,
like everything is great except the mileage.
Oh, that is, that's heartbreaking.
That can be very tough to accept and understand and get through.
I'm not doing it again.
Ehhh
I don't recommend, but I feel like you have to at least try.
So that's that on that. In the comments below, share your own advice.
Tell your own story. Let me know what you think
and we'll see you next week. Bye.