WE ARE SO MUCH MORE THAN ONE THING.
I AM A SON AND A BROTHER AND A HUSBAND,
AND I'M A FRIEND, MEMBER OF A CHURCH.
BEFORE WE EVEN START TALKING ABOUT,
THEN WRITER, SPEAKER, BROADCASTER
WHICH HAS BEEN MY CAREER CALLINGS.
BUT ON TOP OF THAT, I'M A CHILD OF GOD.
ALL OF THOSE ACTUALLY HAVE A ROLE TO PLAY.
ALL OF THOSE HAVE A PART IN OUR SENSE OF IDENTITY.
I THINK IT'S HUMAN TO WANT TO CONTRIBUTE TO THE WORLD.
I THINK THAT'S INGRAINED IN US, PART OF THE IMAGE OF GOD IN US.
WE ARE MADE TO MOVE. WE ARE MADE TO ACT.
I THINK THE PROBLEM COMES WHEN WE DEFINE
AND ADD VALUE OR VALUE ANY CERTAIN ACTIVITIES
AS PART OF THE ANSWER TO THAT.
IT WAS FUNNY BECAUSE I NEVER THOUGHT
THAT I WAS GOING TO BE ON AIR WHEN I STARTED OFF ON RADIO,
EVEN WHEN I HAD THAT CLEAR DIRECTION.
GOT IN MY FIRST RADIO GIG OVER IN PERTH,
IN WESTERN AUSTRALIA.
AND THAT WAS A PROFOUND TIME
OF BECOMING A PROFESSIONAL IN THE JOB, IF YOU LIKE.
I WAS HUNGRY TO EXPLORE PEOPLE'S LIVES.
STORIES ARE SO INCREDIBLY COMPELLING.
I WAS HUNGRY TO FIND SOME CHRISTIAN ANSWERS
TO THE WORLD'S ISSUES.
AND THE MORE THAT WE COULD TALK ABOUT SOCIETY,
WHETHER IT BE SIMPLY THE LONGING OF THE HEART
FOR SPIRITUAL THINGS THAT IS THEN DIRECTED
INTO ALL SORTS OF OTHER KINDS OF AVENUES,
THE MORE I FELT THAT I WAS KIND OF BEING OF
SOME KIND OF BENEFIT TO THE WORLD.
IT WAS A REAL DREAM COME TRUE.
AND WE STARTED OFF BETWEEN SYDNEY AND MELBOURNE.
AND THEN WE GREW TO ABOUT 10 OR 12 CITIES, I THINK.
THERE WAS ANOTHER TEN-YEAR DREAM
THAT WAS RUNNING ALMOST PARALLEL TO IT.
AND THAT WAS THE DREAM FOR MERRYN AND I TO HAVE A FAMILY.
AND OVER THAT TEN YEARS, WE TRIED EVERYTHING.
WE TRIED IN-VITRO FERTILIZATION NUMEROUS TIMES.
WE ACTUALLY WENT THROUGH THE ADOPTION PROCESS.
WE WERE ASSESSED FOR EIGHT MONTHS.
WE THEN WERE ON THE WAITING LIST,
WAITING FOR THAT PHONE CALL TO COME,
TO COME AND PICK UP OUR LITTLE BOY, OUR LITTLE GIRL.
THE PHONE CALL NEVER CAME.
AND THAT'S WHERE THAT 10-YEAR DREAM CAME TO AN END.
SO THAT WAS ONE IDENTITY
THAT I WAS NOT GOING TO BE ABLE TO HAVE.
I WAS NOT GOING TO BE EVER CALLED A FATHER.
THE ONLY OTHER THING THAT MERRYN HAD WANTED TO DO
WITH HER LIFE WAS TO LIVE AND WORK OVERSEAS.
BUT LEAVING EVERYTHING THAT WAS HAPPENING FOR ME
IN AUSTRALIA WAS GOING TO UPSET THAT VERY SOLID IDENTITY
THAT I HAD AS A NATIONAL RADIO SHOW HOST.
AND THAT WAS WHAT REALLY TOOK ME DEEP
INTO THE TOPIC OF IDENTITY,
BECAUSE I COULDN'T HAVE ONE.
THE OTHER THINGS
THAT I'D BEEN BUILDING MY LIFE ON WERE GONE.
AND SO I WAS ASKING THOSE QUESTIONS ALL OVER AGAIN.
WHO ARE YOU, SHERIDAN?
I THOUGHT I'D ANSWERED THOSE QUESTIONS IN MY TWENTIES.
TURNS OUT, SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO ANSWER THEM ALL OVER AGAIN.
SO WHEN WE FIRST MOVED TO ENGLAND
AND THEN PEOPLE WOULD ASK ME,
"SHERIDAN, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
THEY ALL KNEW WHY MERRYN WAS HERE.
SHE WAS HERE TO WORK AT THE UNIVERSITY.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING, SHERIDAN?" WHO ARE YOU?"
I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO ANSWER ANYMORE.
WHAT TENDED TO HAPPEN
IS I WOULD SAY SOMETHING ALONG THE LINES OF,
"OH, I'M ACTUALLY WORKING ON A BOOK.
"I WANT TO WRITE THIS BOOK.
"BUT I USED TO BE A NATIONAL RADIO HOST."
AND ACTUALLY, MERRYN PICKED ME UP ON IT ONCE.
AND SHE SAID, "YOU KNOW,
"WHEN YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT WHAT YOU DO,
"IT'S NOT LONG BEFORE YOU START TALKING
"ABOUT THE RADIO SHOW."
SHE SAID, "IT SOUNDS A LITTLE..."
AND I WENT, "WHAT, PATHETIC?"
AND SHE SAID, "NO."
"IT JUST SOUNDS LIKE YOU'RE INSECURE IN WHO YOU ARE NOW,
"AND SO YOU'RE GOING BACK TO YOUR LAST SUCCESS.
"AND YOU'RE GIVING PEOPLE THAT.
"ACTUALLY, YOU'RE BIGGER THAN THAT."
I HAD, BY THIS STAGE,
I HAD WRITTEN ARTICLES ABOUT BEING A CHILD OF GOD.
I HAD GIVEN SERMONS AT CHURCH ABOUT OUR IDENTITY IN CHRIST.
I'D WRITTEN MAGAZINE ARTICLES ON THIS TOPIC.
I THOUGHT I KNEW THIS TOPIC.
BUT WHAT HAPPENS IS YOUR MOST TREASURED IDENTITIES,
THE ONES THAT YOU ARE REALLY LIVING IN
ARE TAKEN AWAY FROM YOU,
THEN YOU GET TO DISCOVER HOW MUCH THAT IDEA
HAS ACTUALLY GONE DOWN HERE.
I HAD TO DISCOVER A BIGGER SENSE OF SELF,
A BIGGER SENSE OUTSIDE OF CAREER, OUTSIDE OF MINISTRY,
EVEN OUTSIDE OF PARENTHOOD,
A CAREER THAT TOOK ITS PLACE
SECOND OR THIRD
BEHIND THAT GREAT IDENTITY OF BEING A CHILD OF GOD.
THE THING THAT HELPS ME TO NOT LET GO OF THAT IS
TO REMIND MYSELF EVERYDAY OF A COUPLE OF VERSES
IN THE BOOK OF EPHESIANS THAT ARE NOW BECOME MY LIFE VERSES.
EPHESIANS 5:1-2 SAYS "FOLLOW GOD'S EXAMPLE,
"AS DEARLY LOVE CHILDREN AND WALK IN THE WAY OF LOVE,
"JUST AS CHRIST LOVED US AND GAVE HIMSELF UP FOR US
"AS A FRAGRANT OFFERING AND SACRIFICE TO GOD."
IF IT WAS UP TO ME, I WOULD NEVER HAVE GONE PUBLIC
ABOUT OUR TEN-YEAR JOURNEY OF INFERTILITY.
IT IS AN OBJECT OF SHAME FOR MANY PEOPLE,
EVEN IF THEY'RE NOT THE BIOLOGICAL CAUSE
OF THEM NOT BEING ABLE TO HAVE A FAMILY.
I'VE HAD TO LISTEN TO THAT VERSE, "LIVE A LIFE OF LOVE,"
AND SAY, "AS I GO AND DO THAT,
"I AM SERVING PEOPLE."
THOSE DIFFICULT ASPECTS IN YOUR LIFE CAN ACTUALLY
BE THE THING THAT GOD USES
TO BRING YOUR GREATEST CONTRIBUTION INTO THE WORLD.
THE FUNNY THING IS
THAT THE MORE AND MORE I'VE SPOKEN ABOUT THAT
OPENLY AND HONESTLY, THE MORE RESPONSE HAS HAPPENED,
AND THE MORE PEOPLE SOMEHOW ARE ABLE TO
BRING UP THEIR OWN DISAPPOINTMENT WITH GOD,
THEIR OWN SPIRITUAL FAILURE,
AND HAVE BEEN ABLE TO LET GO OF IT
AND ACTUALLY WALK INTO NEW LIVES OF HOPE.
MAYBE DIFFERENT LIVES THAN THEY EVER ENVISIONED ORIGINALLY,
BUT NEW LIVES OF HOPE.
SO AS YOU LIVE A LIFE OF LOVE, AS MUCH AS YOU CAN,
I FAIL EVERY DAY, BUT AS YOU PURSUE THAT,
YOU FIND THAT IT HELPS TO FREE OTHER PEOPLE.
IT HELPS TO ALLOW OTHER PEOPLE
TO DISCOVER A BIGGER SENSE OF IDENTITY
AND A BIGGER SENSE OF CALLING
THAN WHAT THEY'RE CURRENTLY LIVING.