I don't feel that my sister was a strict enough parent
for Tessa and now it's clear that Tessa's out of control.
I definitely feel I was strict enough with my daughter,
taking away things, time out, taking away privileges,
grounding her.
They do not work with her.
When you have a child that is out of control,
the normal means of parenting do not work.
Sometimes I feel like my brother and I are deadbeats.
I just we're not as good as we could be.
I feel like my mom could have raised us a little better.
I do not think my mom should have had kids
if she wasn't gonna take the responsibility
of being a parent.
Let's look at when you said
I'm renting out your room.
I have a transcript of that.
We'll take out the emotion of the yelling and screaming,
and just look at a transcript of that.
Theresa.
I need the blank room because we are blank sinking.
It's not just about blank you.
All you do is lay on your blank ass anyway.
You can lay your blank ass on the blank couch out there.
I've been doing this a long time.
What parenting theory is that?
That's obviously not good.
But what you didn't see is the month before
when I had explained to her nicely,
I'm very sorry.
Okay, you can sleep in my room.
We will make it.
It's only for a short temporary situation, okay?
You don't see all of that.
Okay?
What you see is the final result when it comes
to push and shove and I have to tell her
that this is the way that it is.
Should I allow all of us to become homeless?
You know?
I mean, if I have to do what I have to do to make ends meet.
Okay.
Let me stipulate that for days in advance
you said, sweetie, the reality is we just
have to buckle down here and make some sacrifices.
That's exactly what I said.
Several times.
Probably a hundred times to her.
Okay.
And so I'm stipulating that.
Are you telling me that that justifies this?
No, that's out of frustration.
That is out of desperation.
That is out of trying to take care of my kids by myself
for you know, no child support, for 16 and a half years,
no support, no nothing.
I know that's bad, okay?
I'm not saying that that's a good example.
But that is an accurate example of how a parent
that is frustrated and had enough and had so much stress,
anxiety and abuse from their child, okay?
That's the final outcome.
And I'm not saying that's right.
I'm not saying that that's good, okay?
But that's reality.
So you're frustrated.
And so you're saying that justifies this.
She responds, this is my room.
This is not your room.
Yes it is.
You, inaudible.
On blanking Saturdays, and I'm not gonna
blanking deal with this blank,
or you're gonna end up being out on the blanking street.
Okay, now.
For a month, okay?
I stipulated that.
No, but what you don't see is that for,
this is when she had already dropped out of school,
she's not doing anything, kay?
I've caught her having sex in my attic with a boy,
I mean there's, you know, it's constant, Dr. Phil.
Mm hm.
I'm not saying that's right.
I know that that's not good.
But that is pure frustration.
Then why are you trying to justify it?
I'm being real.
If you acknowledge that it's inappropriate,
if you acknowledge that that's wrong,
then why are you defending it?
I'm not defending it.
I just said it's not right, okay?
But the--
But.
That's real.
K, that is frustration.
That is years and years of trying to deal with a child
and then now you're at the point because she's caused
so much chaos, you're ready to lose your job
and be out on the street
because constantly this is a normal reality.
Okay, you're an adult
with the maturity of an adult
and you're in this situation
and that's the way you're handling it?
How would you expect her to be feeling
with her coping skills as a 10,
11, 12, 13, 14, 15` year old child?
I don't know.
So you're triggering each other.
Pretty much.