Jealousy and Anger
When we have feelings of jealousy,
we should take steps to keep these
emotions from leading to sinful anger.
Here now is Dr. Gene Getz:
We have an incredible accentuated
illustration here of jealousy and anger,
which actually led them to say they wanted to kill him.
That is real jealousy and that is real anger.
I mean this is a very intense situation.
But the fact of the matter is,
there are levels of jealousy
and anger that can lead us to do
things that we shouldn't do.
And so the Principle applies to all levels
of jealousy and anger in order to keep
our feelings from becoming sinful.
Now, anger per se is not sin.
Because Paul said be angry,
and in your anger, don't sin.
It's an emotion that we all have
but we're not to sin in the process.
Let's look at Genesis chapter 37,
where we see this happening:
Then they took him, [they] threw him into the pit. ...
This was the prelude to really destroying him.
Fortunately there wasn't any water in it and he didn't drown.
But later we read that they took him out of the pit.
One of his brothers decided to do that
because he felt it was a better deal and
he didn't want to have to go back and
tell his dad they killed him.
So they sold him to the Midianite traders.
And when we read in Genesis 37:28:
When [the] Midianite traders passed by,
they pulled Joseph out of the pit
and [they] sold him for 20 pieces of silver to the Ishmaelites, who took Joseph to Egypt.
And then we read in verses 31, 32-- and this is probably one of the most
insensitive things they could ever do.
And I think even Lloyd Webber picked
up on this and accentuated it with
hyperbole to get across their
insensitivity to their father when they
came back and told him a lie and what
happened to their son. We read:
So they took Joseph's robe,
[they] slaughtered a young goat, [they] dipped
the robe in its blood.
They sent the robe of many colors to
their father and said, "We found this. Examine it.
"Is it your son's robe or not?"
In other words, the father concluded
that he was killed by a wild animal.
And Jacob bore that burden for many
years until he discovered the truth.
He mourned. I mean, the mourning that he had.
Now obviously, his intense love for
Joseph only intensified the mourning.
In some respects, he probably paid the
result of his favoritism with the results
of intense mourning.
But the fact is, any father would have
mourned over this situation.
And we see the insensitivity of these
brothers to their own father.
But you know, this kind of thing can
happen to even the greatest people
that God has ever used.
One of them was the apostle Paul.
Acts 26--Luke records a conversation of
Paul, as he shared this. He said:
I locked up many of the saints in prison...
This is Paul before he became a believer:
...since I had received authority for that
from the chief priests.
[And] when they were put to death...
And by the way, I think one of the
things in Saul's younger days,
as a young man around 30 years of age--
30 plus--he was about the same age as Jesus.
When the chief priests really gave him the permission.
He was out there to prove who he was as a young (probably) member of that Sanhedrin:
...When I received authority for
that from the chief priests.
[And] when they were put to death...
Put to death! It wasn't just Stephen.
There were other believers.
...When they were put to death,
I cast my vote against them.
And in all the synagogues I often tried
to make them blaspheme by punishing them.
Being greatly enraged at them, I even pursued them to foreign cities.
Not only Damascus, but other foreign cities.
These are details that are not recorded
in terms of the specifics there, but that
was the kind of man that Paul was.
And yet God got ahold of his heart and
changed him. Changed him.
And he wrote these words:
Do not be conquered by evil, but conquer evil with good.
I've mentioned the experience that I
had going into a Texas prison and
talking to a man who was reared in the
ghetto, who became--they called him "Big D."
His name was Alonzo Dixon
and he could bench 520 pounds.
And to him, death was nothing--
to create death in the life of somebody else.
And there in prison he met Jesus.
And as I interviewed him,
I was talking to a gentle giant.
And I asked him the greatest lesson
that he ever learned while he was in prison.
He said, with tears in his voice:
humility--I learned to be humble.
Paul learned to be humble. And he wrote and he said:
Don't be conquered by evil, but conquer evil with good.
This is what Jesus Christ can do in a
person's life when we turn our lives over to Him.
And so the question:
What specific actions have you found to be effective in overcoming feelings of jealousy and anger?
Well one thing that has, I think, been very, very helpful--
at least in my life as I've tried to practice it--
comes from a Principle in Proverbs.
Proverbs Principle 27:
In order to keep anger from being sinful,
we must more and more develop our knowledge and
understanding of ourselves and others.
Perception and understanding is very,
very important in controlling temper.
Proverbs 14:29 addresses this:
A patient person shows great understanding...
And what creates patience? Understanding.
...but a quick-tempered one promotes foolishness.
What kind of understanding can we
get to control our temper?
One thing is, somebody else's behavior
can remind ourselves of what we were
once like because we did the same thing.
But understanding why a person is angry.
I remember a guy calling me one day
on the phone; a young man;
Dallas Seminary student.
He was mad; mad at me; mad at the professors; mad at the elders.
And he was making all kinds of accusations.
And as I stood there that Sunday afternoon,
I wanted to yell back but I said to myself:
This man has some real serious issues
that he's dealing with--that he would
be that vulnerable to call me on the
phone and tell me these things.
And so I listened, got control, and said:
We need to get together tomorrow and talk.
We did. Found out all the stuff that was
going on in his life; the problems he
was facing with his studies.
He was fired from his job.
Nothing he told me--but it all created it.
And I told him at the end of about an hour, I said:
If you had told me those things yesterday, you would have made
it easier for me and easier for yourself.
And he smiled through tears and he said:
I know. But you're the first person
that's ever told me these things
and loved me enough to tell me these things.
Those were his exact words.
And he said that later on another occasion:
You loved me enough to tell me what
was wrong with me.
Now when he first did that, the only
thing that kept me from really reacting
--defending my fellow professors, my
fellow elders, and myself--was to try to
understand where he was coming from.
And I found this to be very helpful.
It doesn't always work, in the sense of
getting ahold of that concept as
quickly as you can. But if you have that
in your mind, it's a very, very important Principle.
Another verse, 17:27. Proverbs 17:27:
The intelligent person restrains his words, and one who keeps a cool head
is a man of understanding.
Isn't that a powerful proverb?
In those situations where you keep a
cool head--relates to understanding, to perception.
So those are some wonderful verses
that help us in practicing this Principle.
And let me read it again:
When we have feelings of jealousy and anger, we should take steps to keep
these emotions from leading to sinful actions.